*NO* Axelay 'Dancing Colonist'

[Liontamer]

* ReMixer name: Written Pages
* Real name: Fred Epe
* Email address: fred.epe@gmail.com
* Website: (see below)
* Original game/title/composer: Axelay / Colony / Sotaro Tojima & M.C. Ada

For my last submission, some of the judges gave me both valuable/useful and cool feedback. I wasn't sure if I should work on Pots of Treasury and resubmit it or use the feedback and get started on a new song instead. I love to move on and try new things, so I chose the latter option and in this case, I chose another Konami title. To me, the folks at Konami have always provided the best music in videogames, back in the 16-bit era and even now ("Silent Hill"). Again, except for the drums, nothing was sequenced.
This leads me to one thing I would like to share with "big giant circles": I am sure you got the judge job at OCREMIX for a reason, but I strongly suggest you do your homework before passing judgement on a submission. Just one example: you criticized my piano "sequencing" last time around; that statement wasn't true - at all! None of the instruments in my songs and remixes are sequenced (well, except for drums ;-)) . You can criticize my playing all you want, sure - but please don't make it look like I sequenced something that I didn't. I am pretty sure most musicians would agree that this is an important fact to note. Just read the info, man ...

Peace out!

--
-= www.unwrittenpages.com =-
-= www.myspace.com/unwrittenpages =-

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Heh. Well, I can't speak for BGC, but sometimes we'll think something sounds hand-sequenced when it's played live. Doesn't happen often, but it happens. But you gotta be asking yourself why anyone would think the performace didn't sound live. Moving on...

You...you remixed Axelay. Holy shit. This game never gets enough props, you earn tons of cred for even tackling this one.

So don't mess it up!!!

http://snesmusic.org/v2/download.php?spcNow=axe - "Colony" (axe-06.spc)

Starts out a bit loud, but already sound interpretive in just using the intro of the original. Picked up at :33 with some beats and e-piano. Now I can easily see why anyone would think your piano work was hand-sequenced. The performance sounded robotic, the timing wasn't smooth at all. Hopefully some piano playing Js can give you more direct advice. The beats and backing instrumentation are also really bland and ultimately leave the texture feeling empty most of the way (1:05-1:15 being an exception). Tons of dead space.

Luckily picked up fairly nicely at 1:45 with some a nice J-rock type of synth lead in the forefront, though the occasional brass embellishments sounded really fake.

2:15 dropped back to the previous verse. The brief bridges and the chorus are filled out a lot better, but the verses are so empty.

What needs to be worked on? Varying up the drum pattern at the core of the arrangement more would help. And fleshing out the texture of the verses with some additional instrumentation. Practicing your performance on the keys is probably something you don't want to hear, but the e-piano easily sounds sequenced. You can complain and treat it as an insult, Fred, or you can suck it up, practice more, and get better. It's definitely a good base, but needs a lot of fine tuning.

NO (resubmit)

[big giant circles]

This leads me to one thing I would like to share with "big giant circles": I am sure you got the judge job at OCREMIX for a reason, but I strongly suggest you do your homework before passing judgement on a submission. Just one example: you criticized my piano "sequencing" last time around; that statement wasn't true - at all! None of the instruments in my songs and remixes are sequenced (well, except for drums ;-)) . You can criticize my playing all you want, sure - but please don't make it look like I sequenced something that I didn't. I am pretty sure most musicians would agree that this is an important fact to note. Just read the info, man ...

Yes, yes, my bad and all that stuff. Honestly, we're beyond the glory days of MIDI/poor sample quality. There are so many ways to feign realism in a mix. Take this mix (http://www.ocremix.org/remix/OCR01487/) in which the opposite occurs, a fake piano sounds realistic. What I'm getting at is it's not my job to read every single email. It's quality control. YOUR job on the other hand, is to make sure that the mix sounds decent (which the piano last go around really did not). And tying in my point that realism can be achieved rather easily these days, I implore you to not look too deep into my overlooking the fact that your piano was live and not sequenced. It still would not have impacted my vote otherwise. And it very well could have been sequenced. Likewise and once more, there's several mixes that could be mistaken for live performances that are not.

Plus, if I honestly read every single remixers' submission email, I would probably never get around to actually analyzing the track. Some people can write books about the simplest things. (Not accusing you of that, but I'm explaining my reason for not reading every last word of every email.)

ALRIGHT

No hard feelings. So onto your mix.

The opening synth is a little on the abrasive sound, while the strings are actually pretty nice. Makes for an interesting texture. For as loud as the intro was, when the melody drop occurs at :34 or so, it much quieter. A bit thin as well. The simple organ melody is a little bland with the synth bass and the drums. Actually, let's talk about the drums for a second. There's some serious lack of beef on them. They're not poorly arranged, but they could stand to have more "Oomph!" in them. Come to think of it, there really should be more low-end in general in here. For all my criticisms so far, I'm actually digging the foundation here, but the mastering fails the mix's ambition once the song is fully underway.

The guitar needs some low end support to. It sounds quite far back for now. And a little heavy in the mid-high frequencies. You should also try some stereo separation on your guitar performances. It'll really thicken up the sound and help with the overall balance (or lack thereof). Meaning, that your mix lacks effective use of the stereo field. Aside from the phasing on the rhodes (or whatever the lead organ is), there's not much to go around.

Now, I do like the more intense moments of your remix, but in regards to the general arrangement, aside from being a little slower with better instruments, there's nothing outstandingly innovative or different from the original. Maybe play around with that a little. Chop and rearrange. Keep us guessing.

At any rate, I suppose I could overlook all these issues and pass this, but the sequencing is just too mechanical.

NO








































(that last part was a joke. all in good fun, bro)

[zircon]

Intro is pretty rockin' in terms of the buildup. I was feeling like something HUGE was coming, but then at :29... what? What happened? Simplistic beats w/ basic jazz organ at :33? I was expecting something way heavier based on that intro. In fact the styles here are all over the place. 1:05 we're back to the dramatic orchestra, and then 1:12, its random guitar stabs with the bingo night organ. Overall I think the soundfield and the writing was simply not cohesive from a musical standpoint, even though I REALLY liked some sections, like 1:46 in particular. Why not just pick that mood and stay with it throughout? Don't go back to the lame organ.

Production wise, the beats are almost non-existant, in the sense that the kick is very hard to hear, and the cymbals override almost everything. They're REALLY loud. Turn them way down, turn the kick way up. More varied percussion sequencing would be really nice, as the beat basically stays the same throughout. Closed hihat, more toms, different kick sequencing, more fills.. using any of these would be good. In the heavy sections like 1:46 and 2:56 things get a little too cluttered sonically. The guitar doesn't sit well in the mix.

The orchestral stuff is good overall, well-executed, but again, I don't like that organ at all. Just because it was in the original doesn't mean you have to use it... and I strongly advise against it as it pulls down everything. The synth bass is also really weak compared to other elements. Guitars are well-performed and the tone is great, but again, mixing-wise, I wasn't really feeling it. Were they double tracked? Seemed kind of mono to me.

The arrangement in general seemed fairly interpretive and well-done, but I believe the biggest problem is the lack of variety in the different sections of the mix. You approached everything the same way in terms of instrumentation, and as a result things FELT repetitive even if you were introducing new variations throughout. In other words, I'm in agreement with Larry.

The combination of my issues w/ production and my somewhat lesser issues w/ the structure & arrangement results in a NO here, but I would like to see this resubmitted. The concept overall is pretty hot, I just think it needs another 20% to really hit our bar.

NO, resub