Zero Punctuation (Hilarious) Game Reviews

[The Damned]

It's a tick.

But it lacks the eight legs that ticks have. So it's an insect.

But then, it's pre-evolved form only has four legs...

But then, Ariados is supposed to be a spider, and it only has six legs...

[Bleck]

it is named Jolt Tick

[Tensei]

I haven't played Pokemon since Gold/Silver... kind of caught on to the same-ness of every release and I always had trouble navigating the "what is everyone weak to" chart that I printed out and set on my lap. I was done when they started giving Pokemon TWO types and I couldn't do the math to figure out what they were weak to.

Most of the type weaknesses make sense (water beats fire, duh), and the ones that don't can generally still be explained away (bug types are weak to poison because of insecticides, water is strong against rock because of water erosion, etc.). I have played like every single pokemon game since I was 10 years old, and I never needed to use a printed chart to figure out the weaknesses.

[The Damned]

I guess Modus is dumber than a 10 year old? :<

Ticks are arachnids, Bleck. It's close enough. They're all gross and icky.

[Modus]

Most of the type weaknesses make sense (water beats fire, duh), and the ones that don't can generally still be explained away (bug types are weak to poison because of insecticides, water is strong against rock because of water erosion, etc.). I have played like every single pokemon game since I was 10 years old, and I never needed to use a printed chart to figure out the weaknesses.

My brother says the same exact thing. But why is ice strong vs. ground? Why is flying strong vs. fight? Rock strong vs. bug? About half of them make perfect sense and the others are whatever they are for the sake of balance.

I once took this class called anatomy. All we did was memorize stuff, hundreds of stuffs. I got a D- while my friend, Talya, studied 5 minutes before each test and got an A. She happens to be a Pokemon fanatic

I guess Modus is dumber than a 10 year old? :<


I once took this class called Media Writing in college. It was understood that no one was supposed to get an A and no one did but three people.

I'm sure you can guess where I'm going with this.

[DarkeSword]

I guess Modus is dumber than a 10 year old? :<
Be nice.

[Modus]

I'm ok. He only hurt my feelings not at all :)

[Dexie]

My brother says the same exact thing. But why is ice strong vs. ground? Why is flying strong vs. fight? Rock strong vs. bug? About half of them make perfect sense and the others are whatever they are for the sake of balance.


Have you ever tried to punch a bird?

[Modus]

Have you ever tried to punch a bird?

No.

Well, twice.

EDIT: I feel like I'm being too anti-Pokemon. I'll try to even it out by saying I loved Pokemon Stadium. Not sure about its sequels but Stadium, especially dem minigames... oh yeah! And the trading card game game. You know, the game about the card game. It was really hard, but at least I didn't have to buy the cardboard version.

[Bleck]

Rock strong vs. bug?

have you ever seen a rock fall on a bug

[Modus]

have you ever seen a rock fall on a bug

Not recently, but I've seen this bug with his rock-crushing pincirs.

http://faqsmedia.ign.com/faqs/image/ani127.gif

[The Damned]

There's probably some kind of obscure Japanese story about a fighter being killed by a hawk or something that would explain the Flying versus Fighting thing.

And I have dropped a rock on a bug, it was a rather large rock on a freaking huge beetle, the guts went everywhere. On my shoes, my pants, on the cat, everywhere.

Never ever squish large insects; they are natures water balloons... but instead of water, it's gross stuff. Just leave them alone.

[Gario]

Yes. Not successfully, though...

Fucking peacocks.

[Emperor Charlemagne]

have you ever seen a rock fall on a bug

One time I tried to kill a yellow jacket by repeatedly throwing a rock onto it as a kid.


The fucker was stronger than I gave it credit for; the motherfucker would not die despite the amount of rocks dropped on it.

[Gario]

That was a flying bug - you should know that it's immune to earth types. Sheesh...

[Emperor Charlemagne]

Goddammit I KNEW I was doing something fucking wrong as a kid.

[Bleck]

That was a flying bug - you should know that it's immune to earth types. Sheesh...

rock does double damage to flying

two birds with one stone

[HalcyonSpirit]

Bug is also weak against Rock. Four birds with one stone.

I think that yellow jacket was hacked.

[Overflow]

Well, if you were a rock type it would have been eight birds. That should have been enough...

[Thin Crust]

Dear God, he's multiplying!!

http://www.nuklearpower.com/comics/8-bit-theater/040703.png

[Soul Splint]

Damn, I turn my back on this thread for one second and we're all of a sudden applying typing to real life scenarios. If someone really wants to explain some weaknesses, explain the dark vs psychic vs fighting vs ghost relationships. Psychic killing fighting makes sense, but the others? You cannot rationalize this one (but I want to see someone try) :-D

[Overflow]

Fighting VS Dark:
A bunch of jocks beating up a bunch of emos.

[Dexie]

Damn, I turn my back on this thread for one second and we're all of a sudden applying typing to real life scenarios. If someone really wants to explain some weaknesses, explain the dark vs psychic vs fighting vs ghost relationships. Psychic killing fighting makes sense, but the others? You cannot rationalize this one (but I want to see someone try) :-D

I got this.

Psychic is weak to Dark and Ghost (and Bug for that matter) because all three are common fears people have. It's hard to concentrate when you're afraid of something, right?

Fighting beats Dark because Fighting types are supposed to be heroic, straight up fighters, while Dark types are underhanded and fight with cheap tactics. Who always wins in stories? The hero.

Dark beats Ghost because, well...have you ever tried to scare the darkness?

Next!

[Scufo]

Okay, how about

Psychic beats Posion?

Ground beats Rock?

Bug beats Dark?

Ice beats Dragon?

Fighting beats Steel? Have you ever tried to punch something made out of steel?

[Thalzon]

Remember, dark is evil here.

Why is poison weak to psychic?

EDIT: Beaten to it. But ice beats dragon because dragons are cold-blooded.

[Soul Splint]

Fighting VS Dark:
A bunch of jocks beating up a bunch of emos.

You win the internet.:lmassoff:


Dragon weak to ice isn't surprising, they usually are in most stories and movies that I'm familiar with.

But Poison weak to Psychic? Hmmm.....
That's gonna take a couple of nights to sleep on it.


Even better, WHY do bugs resist fighting?
I don't know about anyone else, but the few times I have punched a bug I definitely won the fight.

[Kenogu Labz]

Bugs vs. fighting: Bugs that size are gonna have some pretty thick exoskeletons.

[Emperor Charlemagne]

I mean yeah, an ant can lift 50 times its weight.

Now, imagine a huge-ass ant.
You get the picture.

[Overflow]

I mean yeah, an ant can lift 50 times its weight.

Now, imagine a huge-ass ant.


Made of metal.

[chthonic]

has someone already said "who gives a fuck"

[RDX]

psychic beats poison because shit man how you gonna poison a psychic

expanding on that thought

Ground beats Rock?
Where did that rock come from?

Bug beats Dark?
Lots of bugs come out at night. Ever turn on the lights are 2 in the morning in a place that's usually dark? Guarantee there's gonna be at least one spider sitting on the wall. And most bugs either can see in the dark or they don't use their eyes. Or they don't have any.

Ice beats Dragon?
cold blood

Fighting beats Steel? Have you ever tried to punch something made out of steel?
japanese myth

Even better, WHY do bugs resist fighting?
I don't know about anyone else, but the few times I have punched a bug I definitely won the fight.I'm seriously willing to bet at least half of the type match ups have something to do with some ancient japanese myth or something. It's possible.

[HalcyonSpirit]

But Poison weak to Psychic? Hmmm.....
That's gonna take a couple of nights to sleep on it.

I suppose you've never read Dune? :razz:

[The Damned]

Or that psychic energy somehow purifies poison... or mind over matter, or something.

[Soul Splint]

I suppose you've never read Dune? :razz:


I have, but its been years. Elaboration?

[HalcyonSpirit]

I have, but its been years. Elaboration?

The most obvious example that comes to mind is when Jessica, being the story's equivalent of a psychic, drinks the Water of Life and is able to change the structure of the poison it contained so as to render it harmless.

Basically, what Damned just said above about psychic energy purifying poison.

[The Damned]

Frank Herbert was one of the influences on Satoshi Tajiri's creation of Pokémon back in the early early 90s. OK, not really...

[Mr. Bottle Rocket]

Well shit, now I must like pokemon because I quite clearly love dune.

[Malaki-LEGEND.sys]

You guys should take your pokegasm over to the actual Pokemon thread.

[The Damned]

When the next ZP episode is out, sure. Until then, the discussion is valid, just like every other game he reviewed and we talked about.

[Tensei]

But why is ice strong vs. ground? Why is flying strong vs. fight? Rock strong vs. bug? About half of them make perfect sense and the others are whatever they are for the sake of balance.


Dude, I totally got this. Ice vs. Ground: Frozen Soil is more brittle etc.

Psychic Vs. Dark thing can be explained away by the fact that Dark Types are evil (their type in japanese is aku, which literally means evil) so their minds are basically too evil to comprehend, a psychic void, etc.

They're kind of pussies physically so they do get pushed around by Fighting types, and they piss their pants at the sight of big scary bugs.

Same goes for Psychics who get scared by ghosts, dark types, and bugs.

Fighting in general beats everything that can be considered brittle, from Ice up to Steel (Brick Break, Rock Smash), but has trouble reaching Flying types. Their attacks are also ineffective against poison types since those often have amorphous bodies that can absorb physical punches. The same goes for bugs because catching flies with chopsticks, etc.

[Scufo]

I always thought of Dark types more as "dirty fighters" than genuine evil. Moves like Sucker Punch and Thief and Beat Up. That's why I like the idea of Fighting types beating them because they are straight up more skilled and dirty fighting doesn't phase them.

But hey I guess if the ORIGINAL JAPANESE says they're evil then whatev.

[PROTO·DOME]

Surely to make a balanced game, they had to come up with a few random, nonsensical weaknesses to keep it fun?

[Cyril the Wolf]

Surely to make a balanced game, they had to come up with a few random, nonsensical weaknesses to keep it fun?

FUN??!?! WHO PLAYS GAMES FOR FUN!!!

You sir, clearly need to reevaluate your stance on life. <3

[ocre]

http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f278/katietiedrich/comic163b.png

[The Coop]

Yakuza 4 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3035-Yakuza-4)

[The Coop]

Crysis 2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3079-Crysis-2)

[Thin Crust]

Crysis 2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3079-Crysis-2)

Hey, he's not in this one either.

[big giant circles]

Nintendo 3DS (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3112-Nintendo-3DS)

[Thin Crust]

Hey, he's not in this one either. What's going on Yatzee?

[The Damned]

For some reason, I can not watch any video on the Escapist. Any of them. It's not that they aren't playing, it's that they aren't even loading. Like, as in, there is no place for the video on the page for them to appear. It's like it's been filtered out by adblock or something, except according to adblock, there isn't any video to block. The server itself seems to be not sending anything video-related to my computer at all.

And yes, I checked adblock, it's not listing anything related to videos to block, and I've even tried disabling the entire site just to see if that was the problem. No good, video are still completely non-existent. I've made sure everything is up-to-date, and still nothing.

I can only assume that I have been video-watching banned from the Escapist for some reason, or that Sony network hackers have somehow fucked with the page.

[KyleJCrb]

Did you try another browser?

[Brushfire]

For some reason, I can not watch any video on the Escapist. Any of them. It's not that they aren't playing, it's that they aren't even loading. Like, as in, there is no place for the video on the page for them to appear. It's like it's been filtered out by adblock or something, except according to adblock, there isn't any video to block. The server itself seems to be not sending anything video-related to my computer at all.

And yes, I checked adblock, it's not listing anything related to videos to block, and I've even tried disabling the entire site just to see if that was the problem. No good, video are still completely non-existent. I've made sure everything is up-to-date, and still nothing.

I can only assume that I have been video-watching banned from the Escapist for some reason, or that Sony network hackers have somehow fucked with the page.

Are you having the same problem across multiple sites?

[The Damned]

Are you having the same problem across multiple sites?

Nope, I just watched a Thor Trailer, and I was on GameTrailers before without any problems.

Did you try another browser?
IE shows a proper video border, but won't play the video at all (gives a red x and just sits there, doing nothing). But if I fuck with IE a bit, it will play eventually. So it must be something that Firefox doesn't like about that site.

The thing is, I've had this pop up before, but it ended up fixing itself a few days later, if I recall correctly.

[Mr. Bottle Rocket]

Portal 2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3153-Portal-2)

I pretty much expected him to say what he did in this one.

[Scufo]

Portal 2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3153-Portal-2)

I pretty much expected him to say what he did in this one.

I agree with pretty much everything that was said.

Really good, but not as good as first, because it has some minor flaws. Whereas Portal has none.

[Thin Crust]

Again, the guy isn't there. He's in every episode for a year and then all of the sudden, he disappears.

[Scufo]

who are you talking about?

[Thin Crust]

This guy
http://img153.imageshack.us/img153/2908/48673883.png

[The Damned]

The thing is, I've had this pop up before, but it ended up fixing itself a few days later, if I recall correctly.

Case in point: I can watch this week's episode without a single problem.

Like I said, it's some random quirk that FireFox and/or The Escapist has.

[Scufo]

This guy
http://img153.imageshack.us/img153/2908/48673883.png

oh. okay?http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/ce/Transparent.gif?

[The Coop]

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3188-Castlevania-Symphony-of-the-Night)

[Less Ashamed Of Self]

This was another really good one. The last 3 have all made me lol quite a bit.

[Thin Crust]

Hey, he's an origami figure this time.

[Less Ashamed Of Self]

oh. okay?http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/ce/Transparent.gif?

Yeah... um... who is this guy? There must be a backstory.

[Mr. Bottle Rocket]

There is, yahtzee scoured the net for the image of the most expressionless face he could find and he came upon this guy which he remarked as "being the only person whose expression showed no signs of any discernable emotion" (or something to that effect). That's it.

[Thylacine]

There is, yahtzee scoured the net for the image of the most expressionless face he could find and he came upon this guy which he remarked as "being the only person whose expression showed no signs of any discernable emotion" (or something to that effect). That's it.In other words, he's Yahtzee's "Nice Work" guy in the sense that we're probably never going to know who he actually is unless we randomly bump into him on the street?

[big giant circles]

Mortal Kombat (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3250-Mortal-Kombat)

[Thin Crust]

Hey, he's a photo cutout of a person in a costume this time.

[Arek the Absolute]

Hey, he's a photo cutout of a person in a costume this time.

noone cares stop posting about it

[The Damned]

We missed last weeks. He covers Brink.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3286-Brink

[The Damned]

Last week was something about E3, skip it.

This week is some game I've never heard of, but he seems to genuinely like talking about.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3540-Hunted-The-Demons-Forge

[Thylacine]

???

Last week was the Witcher 2 (which I can't get a link for because my computer isn't loading the Escapist - Did Lulzboat attack again?). He hasn't done an E3 video this year. He only did a write-up on Extra Punctuation.

And if he does do it, it might get postponed another week because everyone will be wanting DNF (which should be a fantastic review).

[The Damned]

I think you're right. I've must be thinking of another video I saw.

Too many E3 videos, all overlapping. I'm getting them mixed up.

[Thylacine]

Alice: Madness Returns (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3652-Alice-Madness-Returns)

This one feels like a return to form for Yahtzee. Honest, clear-cut, simple metaphors throughout, and just enjoyable to watch. (Dead thread is dead - not hunting the other reviews down at this moment).

[KyleJCrb]

Poor Yahtzee. He sounds more deathly ill than usual when he gets sick this week.

[The Coop]

I leave for three months, and you guys get lazy :razz:

Shadows of the Damned (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3675-Shadows-of-the-Damned)

F.E.A.R. 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3724-FEAR-3)

L.A. Noire (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3347-L-A-Noire)

The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3443-The-Witcher-2-Assassins-of-Kings)

Duke Nukem Forever for real this time (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3581-Duke-Nukem-Forever-for-real-this-time)

Infamous 2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3611-Infamous-2)

The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3780-The-Legend-of-Zelda-Ocarina-of-Time-3D)

Call of Juarez: The Cartel (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3801-Call-of-Juarez-The-Cartel)

Bastion and From Dust (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3839-Bastion-and-From-Dust)

Catherine (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3872-Catherine)

[Thin Crust]

I think people lost interest in him. I know I have.

[big giant circles]

I think people lost interest in him. I know I have.

I do phase out occasionally, but he's still as good a writer as he was back when he first caught my interest, so I'm still happy to watch his reviews.

[JerryTerry]

I think people lost interest in him. I know I have.

Or maybe people got sick of waiting through a '30-second' advert that freezes to buffer every 2 seconds while the "Your content will be displayed in..." counter refuses to go down during these periods.
Every. Single. Time.
Especially when said advert only decides to appear halfway through the episode, returning you to the start of the video after wiping the content your computer had already buffered.

Or maybe that's just me. Still watch it every week, though.

[The Coop]

I've read about those 30-second advertisements, but I've never once seen one when watching the Escapist videos. The only thing I ever see is the surrounding, static game promotion graphics that come up before the videos ever play (which is Dragon Nest at the moment).

[KyleJCrb]

Thank you, AdBlock, for blocking all of the stupid crap like that.

[linkspast]

I leave for three months, and you guys get lazy :razz:

Shadows of the Damned (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3675-Shadows-of-the-Damned)

F.E.A.R. 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3724-FEAR-3)

L.A. Noire (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3347-L-A-Noire)

The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3443-The-Witcher-2-Assassins-of-Kings)

Duke Nukem Forever for real this time (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3581-Duke-Nukem-Forever-for-real-this-time)

Infamous 2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3611-Infamous-2)

The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3780-The-Legend-of-Zelda-Ocarina-of-Time-3D)

Call of Juarez: The Cartel (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3801-Call-of-Juarez-The-Cartel)

Bastion and From Dust (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3839-Bastion-and-From-Dust)

Catherine (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3872-Catherine)

But now you`re back...

I was actually thinking about this guy (the show really) when I saw all the junk that was (is) going down with Extra Credits, and wondering where he was.>

But now you`re back...

[Gollgagh]

But now your back...

I want to tear your hair out.

[big giant circles]

Or maybe people got sick of waiting through a '30-second' advert that freezes to buffer every 2 seconds while the "Your content will be displayed in..." counter refuses to go down during these periods.
Every. Single. Time.


That's kind of how I feel about all the Legend of Zelda games and their @$#@%#@#$@#$ing unskippable cutscenes.

OH HEY I FOUND ANOTHER COMPASS. THANK YOU SO MUCH NINTENDO FOR EXPLAINING TO ME FOR THE 600TH TIME WHAT THEY DO AGAIN.

[/derail]

Anyway, hurrah Yahtzee, still fresh and funny to me, I don't mind the ads so much personally. His reviews usually entertain me enough that it's a fair trade.

[Scufo]

I still watch and like ZP, and adblock is your friend.

[The Coop]

A little late, but...

Red Faction: Armageddon (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/3942-Red-Faction-Armageddon)

[The Coop]

Deus Ex (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4093-Deus-Ex)

[Zerothemaster]

I was just watching the LOZ:OOC one. At school. I had to stop because I didn't want to burst out laughing XD

[The Coop]

Deus Ex: Human Revolution (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4137-Deus-Ex-Human-Revolution)

[Phonetic Hero]

i was just watching the loz:ooc one. At school. I had to stop because i didn't want to burst out laughing xd

fuck me it's cold in here

Edit: Goddammit, my caps isn't working... I'm a lot angrier than I appear, but you can't tell. Because I have no capitals

OH OK NOW IT WORKS

DERP

[big giant circles]

Deus Ex: Human Revolution (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4137-Deus-Ex-Human-Revolution)

I stopped watching towards the end when he gave the spoiler warning. Seems like he liked it otherwise though!

[The Coop]

Driver: San Francisco (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4181-Driver-San-Francisco)

[FuriousFure]

Looks like he actually liked this game. barely any real criticisms and every dislike seemed ended with "but it doesn't disrupt the flow"

I never really got into the driver games and what I saw of Driv3r made me want to stay further away, but might need to check this one out.

[Gario]

Yes, I'd gather he liked the game since he actually said he liked the game from the offset.

[FuriousFure]

Yes, I'd gather he liked the game since he actually said he liked the game from the offset.

ah. well, I do apologize for contributing to the thread, I thought it was a satisfactory, albeit obvious, opening statement. Although, it could have been seen as synopsis instead of a revelation.

I wonder how is going to feel about Gears of War 3, if/when he wants to review it. I'm sure this one is going feature even more hair tussling!

[The Coop]

Dead Island (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4694-Dead-Island)

[The Coop]

Resistance 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4728-Resistance-3)

[KyleJCrb]

Resistance 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4728-Resistance-3)

I gotta say this is one of my favorite recent reviews. Absolutely hilarious.

[The Coop]

Gears of War 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4763-Gears-of-War-3)

[Gollgagh]

oh

I'm not sure when it happened, but the in/outro is now normalized!

yay!

[The Coop]

Hard Reset (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4784-Hard-Reset)

[The Coop]

Rage http://user.xthost.info/thecoop/blank.gif (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4824-Rage)

[The Coop]

Kinect (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4863-Kinect)http://user.xthost.info/thecoop/blank.gif

[The Coop]

Batman: Arkham City (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4915-Batman-Arkham-City)

[Thylacine]

That bit about Catwoman moving about the city was hilarious.

Does it seem like Yahtzee is funnier on the more mainstream games, or is it just a better familiarity with the source material that does it?

[The Coop]

Battlefield 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4948-Battlefield-3)

[The Coop]

Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4972-Uncharted-3-Drakes-Deception)

[The Author]

He's been boring me lately.

[The Coop]

Call of-Duty: Modern Warfare 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5006-Call-of-Duty-Modern-Warfare-3)

[Modus]

I hate it when he reviews these games because nobody buys them for the campaign. I don't want to hear critique for the campaign, because who cares.

That said, a friend gifted me MW3, and the multiplayer is... adequate. One thing I'm having a hard time getting used to is how fast you die. All the emphasis is on reaction time. The graphics are very good, but the palette feels extremely dark, giving it a strange cartoon-like atmosphere because real life has more contrast. The maps are also far less interesting than MW2's.

[GeckoYamori]

If nobody buys them for the campaign, why is the majority of the game's budget spent on it?

[Modus]

I dunno. Citation?

Even if it's true, FPS campaigns have never been able to engage me. I love single player games, but not in this form. Chalk it up to personal preference I guess.

EDIT: Tried booting up the MW3 campaign to prove myself wrong, but I get an error on the first loading screen every time I try. Glad to see that budget was spent so well that I can't even start the game XD

[GeckoYamori]

It's an educated guess. The single player campaigns require writers, voice actors, set piece levels with a shit-ton of scripted events going on, lots of special animation work, and god knows what else. Do you have a citation for most buyers ignoring the single player?

[The Coop]

... because nobody buys them for the campaign. I don't want to hear critique for the campaign, because who cares.

I do, on both counts.

Frankly, that multiplayer has become far more important to gamers than the single-player experience is disheartening to say the least.

[DusK]

Do you have a citation for most buyers ignoring the single player?
I'm not sure about MW3, as I'm not interested in the least, but a quick visit to the Battlelog forums (BF3's online service) will yield that there's a definite understanding between the community and DICE that the game is multiplayer-centric. Battlefield's always kinda been a primarily multiplayer game. Kinda like UT.

[Modus]

I do, on both counts.

Frankly, that multiplayer has become far more important to gamers than the single-player experience is disheartening to say the least.
For FPS games. I really don't care to do a campaign in a format where the only mechanic is to aim down your sights and fire.

Single player is very important to me, but RPGs and action games have better means to support an engaging single player experience. For me, anyway.


It's an educated guess. The single player campaigns require writers, voice actors, set piece levels with a shit-ton of scripted events going on, lots of special animation work, and god knows what else. Do you have a citation for most buyers ignoring the single player?

No, but I think there's a lot of work that goes into multiplayer too. Map design, sound design, network engineering, scripting for all the killstreaks, programming for matchmaking, tons of testing needed to simulate a multiplayer experience designed for 16+ players at once. I think it's every bit as complex as a campaign, and probably costs a pretty penny.

[Native Jovian]

Frankly, that multiplayer has become far more important to gamers than the single-player experience is disheartening to say the least.
It hasn't. Otherwise single-player only games like Deus Ex: Human Revolution or Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim wouldn't have sold as ridiculously holy shit well as they did.

[The Coop]

Yes, I forgot to put that I was referring to FPS games in my previous post, which was my bad.

[The Coop]

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5020-The-Elder-Scrolls-V-Skyrim)

[The Coop]

Saints Row: The Third (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5056-Saints-Row-The-Third)

[The Coop]

Assassins Creed: Revelations (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5114-Assassins-Creed-Revelations)

[The Coop]

The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5148-The-Legend-of-Zelda-Skyward-Sword)

[The Coop]

Serious Sam 3: BFE (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5184-Serious-Sam-3-BFE)

[The Coop]

Top 5 of 2011 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5207-Top-5-of-2011)

[Dj Mokram]

Oh man, I totally forgot about ZP. Gotta catch up to all these...
Thanks for keeping the list up to date The Coop. It's a time saver. :)

[The Coop]

Super Mario 3D Land and Rayman Origins (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5239-Super-Mario-3D-Land-Rayman-Origins)

[Overflow]

Can you say: bias?

[Gollgagh]

well that's an endorsement if ever I've heard one

[Unstable Hamster]

Yea there is a pretty big bias there. But I will admit that Rayman Origins is DAMN good. I still have yet to grab Mario, so I can't really say anything about that one. Still though, Rayman is an ungodly amount of fun, especially with 4 people.

[chthonic]

wow, yahtzee. really? that was weak

[The Coop]

Sonic Generations (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5284-Sonic-Generations)

[The Coop]

Star Wars: The Old Republic (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5323-Star-Wars-The-Old-Republic)

[The Coop]

Amy (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5346-Amy)

http://user.xthost.info/thecoop/blank.gif

[big giant circles]

I haven't been able to connect to the Escapist for a couple days now. No idea what's up.

[Thin Crust]

Works for me.

[Ramaniscence]

I haven't been able to connect to the Escapist for a couple days now. No idea what's up.

You too? I thought is was just my ISP being stupid.

[Bleck]

I can, but it's very, very slow

[big giant circles]

You too? I thought is was just my ISP being stupid.

Yep, still can't view it :-\

[Mr. Bottle Rocket]

I was just there, didn't have any issues. :0

[The Coop]

Resident Evil: Revelations (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5373-Resident-Evil-Revelations)

[Overflow]

Not even one mention of the circle pad pro?

Hmm.

[Scufo]

My internet sucks anyway, but I can't load ZP at all.

[The Damned]

Ha! Usually, I have the problem of not being able to load and view the site or videos. Now it's all turned around.

HA, I say!

[The Coop]

Darkness 2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5394-Darkness-2)

[The Coop]

Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5416-Kingdoms-of-Amalur-Reckoning)

[The Coop]

NeverDead (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5443-NeverDead)http://user.xthost.info/thecoop/blank.gif

[The Coop]

Syndicate (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5478-Syndicate) http://user.xthost.info/thecoop/blank.gif

[The Damned]

Oh for fucks's sake... now I can't see any of the videos again.

Fucking escapist... no other site does this, just theirs.

[The Coop]

Mass Effect 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5497-Mass-Effect-3)

[The Coop]

Twisted Metal (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5531-Twisted-Metal)

[Zerothemaster]

C'mon Yahtzee... Review SH:Downpour.

You know you want to...

[The Coop]

Yakuza: Dead Souls (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5558-Yakuza-Dead-Souls)

[Calpis]

God, I can't stand his bludgeoning of Japanese words. Ya-kooooooza.

[Dj Mokram]

C'mon Yahtzee... Review SH:Downpour.

^ This. It's gonna be a massacre. And he'll most likely drop some acid on the SH HD Collection too.

[The Coop]

Ninja Gaiden 3 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5576-Ninja-Gaiden-3)

[BlueMage]

Completely off-topic, goddammit Coop, I just spent the last five minutes watching your awesome signature. AGAIN.

Reasonably on-topic - Yahtzee's bar is currently closed, and this annoys me.

[chthonic]

I like AAA Gaming as a buzzword

gotta ring to it

[The Coop]

Silent Hill: Downpour (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5595-Silent-Hill-Downpour)

[The Coop]

Kid Icarus: Uprising (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5634-Kid-Icarus-Uprising)

[Dj Mokram]

Silent Hill: Downpour (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5595-Silent-Hill-Downpour)
T'was a little saddening to see him try to redeem the SH serie as whole.
No mention of the abomination that was SH HD Collection either. Oh, well.

Meanwhile, a single man (Jasper Byrne) made a better Silent Hill game on his own than Konami ever could (http://www.lonesurvivor.co.uk/).
And it's in freaking 2D. :shock:

[CinnamonJihad]

Kid Icarus: Uprising (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5634-Kid-Icarus-Uprising)

Ya know, I actually appreciated his rant about all of the arbitrary Nintendo hate going on. I don't understand where it comes from. I have had to listen to tons of people slam Nintendo and accuse them of ruining modern games, and I guess I can't seem to make that connection. I don't think Nintendo's actions as of late warrants any hate, especially as I consistently like the games they publish.

[The Coop]

Fez and I Am Alive (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5662-Fez-and-I-Am-Alive)

[Thylacine]

I wonder if tonsillitis would count as a work-related illness in his world. It's a little intense that he did a review while in that condition.

[Emperor Charlemagne]

ha ha of course Yahtzee would like a shitty art game like Fez.

[The Coop]

Prototype 2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5688-Prototype-2)

[The Coop]

Risen 2: Dark Waters (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5710-Risen-2-Dark-Waters)

[The Coop]

Sniper Elite V2 (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/5745-Sniper-Elite-V2)

[relyanCe]

Ya-kooooooza.
no it's yuh-KUUUUU-zer