[Hylian Lemon]

I know, I have other projects to attend to, but I made this for a friend's birthday. So here we go. This is a remix of Mushroom Gorge from Mario Kart Wii. We will be following a fresh mountain stream as it passes through a cloud-making factory!

Fog Factory v2 (Oct 19)

Source - Mushroom Gorge

[Spakku]

Maybe it's just my TV, but your source link doesn't sound quite like how I remember it.

Your musical guide makes me think you didn't push the arrangement far enough. The following is suggestions, but put your own judgment ahead of mine, as you're clearly already more of a musician than I am.

0:00 - 0:30 sounds pretty and peaceful, but it should probably be quieter.
0:30 - 1:14 sounds mechanical but I feel you should go for more industrial.
1:14 - 1:41 sounds good as far as that it conveys...well, conveyance. But the instruments need to flow better, so as to convey water as well.
1:41 - 2:09 doesn't sound so much like heat and pressure as it does malice. I don't know how how to improve that, though.
2:09 - 2:16 sounds about right.
2:16 - 2:53 should use softer, lighter instruments. It's wind and clouds, it needs to be a gentler arrangement.
2:53 - 3:37 should drop the strings. They just feel out of place.


My changes are more drastic, though, and wouldn't go together quite so easily. If you plan on going farther with arrangement variety, you should consider lengthening the track.

[Invader_Quirk]

I thought it was fantastic. It's better than a lot of stuff already on the site. It progresses nicely and expands on the source. I say submit it, although I'm no music expert by a long shot.

[Hylian Lemon]

Thanks for the comments. I'll try to incorporate some of your ideas, Spakku; they generally do make sense. Except how does one classify the difference between mechanical and industrial?

And to be honest, I really only came up with the "story" when I was almost done with the remix. Would it be better without the step-by-step guide?

[Spakku]

If you get rid of the story guide it would leave the track more open to interpretation, which I think is a generally good thing. And there'd be less of a risk of fucking it up by incorporating my ideas.

Mechanical is how you play it, industrial is the sounds you use.

[The Derrit]

I agree that overall it sounds pretty mechanical, and also the flutes and the synth don't mesh that well, you might want to try and find a less disruptive synth to use.

Aside from that bravo i like it so far, its got a ways to go though.

[evktalo]

Good stuff, I enjoyed it. As always, I'm impressed by your use of tempo changes. I also dig the time signature changes.

I agree with Spakku that the intro should be quieter. The next part with the industrial percussion loop (probably not technically a loop) is begging for some higher-quality samples thrown in, it's pretty lofi, which is fine in itself, but could use additional something with more presence. I feel the sound quality could be improved throughout the track, but that point especially caught my ear.


--Eino

[Hylian Lemon]

All right. I still have to work on the main synth, but I didn't want to look dead, so I made several other updates:

Fog Factory v2

-Intro is quieter
-Next section has better industrial sounds and overall quality
-Added a few of these new sounds here and there throughout the mix
-Removed strings from ending

And I had questions about the main synth. I'm attempting to learn a little about all the knobs and stuff, but in the meantime, could someone be a little more specific about the change it needs? So far I have "less disruptive" and "higher quality." What makes it "disruptive," for example?

[Spakku]

When they say "higher-quality samples" they mean they want you to improve the actual instrument files that your computer is using. As in getting new ones.
Sound fonts, and what-not. Though, I'm not sure where to get them.

[evktalo]

Intro is better now, good! New industrial sounds sound *great* to me. They overpower the strings instruments in their first section, but it didn't sound bad. I like the percussion taking the lead. It gives character to the whole mix. I'm thinking upping the industry percussion in some later section could be good, sort of balancing the arrangement.

I don't have the qualms about percussion sample quality anymore. Good work! Did you change the piano? It feels like it sounds better than last time. Outro is nicer without the strings.

I like this! The basswork deserves a mention too, good lines. Just checked the source, great work changing the feel of the track!

--Eino