[jabond23]

Alright. I was in the remix request forum and saw that someone wanted an epic metal version of the big boss theme from Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island for the SNES. This was requested by a forum user, Swordbreaker and KyleJCrb kept it alive. Gario also said he wouldn't mind hearing a metal version of this song.

Anyways. It clocks in at 5:13 long, but its not at all repetitive. I tried adding some new sections and interludes that set it apart from the original theme. I'm pretty sure i've got all my writing done that i wanna do. As for the production/mixing, most of that is done as well, but i'm not sure if its as crisp as it could be. I think maybe some of the volumes need to be adjusted as well as EQ, but i wanted to put this up for critique in the mean time.

Let me know what ya guys think. :D

Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xDjN45wheM
WIP: http://ocrwip.fireslash.net/?fid=242
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[Gario]

Hah, I was waiting to see what you'd do with it. You didn't disappoint - I love that intro .

Yeah, the EQ is really, really hot throughout, so you certainly need to work on the upper end of the EQ, there (lower it significantly). Again, a common issue you tend to have though is that the leads never stick out - you need to mix the leads into the forefrone a bit better.

Sone of the notes were a bit off in the beginning (at 0:21), you should take a look into that.

I really like the arrangement direction you took with this one - Swordbreaker better like it . It's a touch on the liberal side, but I can still identify the source well. The song felt just right when it comes to length; it didn't leave me hanging nor get me bored, at all. Very sweet arrangement.

May I add that this was indeed epic?

Indeed.

[jabond23]

I'm glad you enjoyed it Gario. Like i said, this was a lot of fun to do cause its just an intense track to begin with and epic is definitely what i was going for.

I lowered the high's tremendously on the EQ's for all the tracks. Especially the ones that jumped out too far. I also reworked the volumes so the leads stand out much more as well. I'm hoping this is sounding better. As for the part :21, are you talking about the guitar? Or the orchestra behind it?

I think i might actually sub this one, but only if i can get the production tight. I know the judges like the more interpretative side of remixing nowadays. Which is actually better anyways. You can go on youtube and find a handful of just covers but find no remixes for that track.

http://ocrwip.fireslash.net/?fid=243

[Gario]

Sorry for the late response...

As for the part :21, are you talking about the guitar? Or the orchestra behind it?

The guitar hits some sour notes. I'd just stick to the source, for that tiny part .

Wow, nice organ - I couldn't hear it before. The balance of the mix is doing better, I'll admit. The guitar still drowns the orchestra when it shouldn't from time to time, but that's not hard to fix (I don't think).

Yeah, keep cleaning it up - I don't have my volume up enough to give you better feedback (sorry!)... Isn't anyone else gonna help a brotha remixer out?

[jabond23]

That intro part at :21 is still the original but i plan on fixing it. I thought they were the correct notes according to the source, but doesn't mean they sound good when played on a guitar. :D

I also fixed the volumes issues with the guitar overpowering the orchestra at certain points. The orchestra now stands out quite nicely and its a little more cleaned up compared to the last version.


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http://ocrwip.fireslash.net/?fid=249

[SwordBreaker]

I just noticed this. I should check the WIP boards more.

First off, thanks for taking on my request, dude. This is such a cool track that deserves more remixes.

I like the direction you took with the remix overall. Epic stuff. High energy and fast-paced. A very authentic thrash metal sound. The performances on the guitar playing, soloing and synth are also pretty cool. I especially love the intro of the track. There are a couple of problems here, though:

1) A tad liberal for OC ReMix. Don't get me wrong; I enjoyed the originality in the track and the mix-ups so it's not repetitive. The thing is that you basically crammed the whole source tune in the first minute and a half and some towards the end...and the rest of the track is just original work. I recommend that you spread out the source tune more throughout the track...like cutting the source tune into parts, then weaving each part with your original stuff so that the transitions are seamless. Another idea is to alternate the lead synth part and solos of the source tune between your guitars and synth.

2) Guitar sounds muddy. Drum samples are sort of drowned out. I'm not the best guy on technicalities to improve the quality of guitar sounds. Let's hope our OCR rock experts can give more feedback. Sixto, OA, CHIPP Damage, Nekofrog, Tensei-san are examples of such people.

3) Like I said before, the synth piano playing and guitars complement each other well. I'd like the synth to stand out more though. Also, I don't like the synth sounds used in the part after the first minute. I prefer the higher-pitched one that you used before that timeframe.

4) The orchestrated sounds still sound like an afterthought compared to the guitars and synth. Also, the orchestra-only part that comes up in the middle of the track is unnecessary as it cuts down on the energy of the playing abruptly. I prefer that you used that part with the intro and after the 4th minute...it'll sound better.

Keep cleaning this up, man. I like where you're going with this and it'll be great if you perfect your work so it can get accepted on OCR.

[jabond23]

Yeah, i've had remixes rejected before because they weren't liberal enough, but i see what your getting at. I'm gonna fix the latter synths you mentioned to the higher synth. It does actually sound better that way now that i hear it. I'm gonna tweak the volume a tad and the EQ as well to make that lead synth you like stand out a little more. Also, i'm cleaning up the rhythm guitars and drums to be a little more on the higher side so they don't sound so muddy and drowned out. That orchestrated part you were talking was my attempt to break up the track but keep it epic at the same time. What i'm gonna do is just take out the orchestra only part but keep the part where it plays with the guitars/drums so it flows nicely and keeps the energy moving along nicely.

I'll put the fixed up version on here tomorrow when i mess around with a bit more and then see what you think of it. I might change the second leads part after the what i call, the "chorus" with the really fast drums and the rhythm organ, at around 1:45 to something more along the lines of the source tune so it better carries the source sound throughout.

[jabond23]

Alright. I fixed a lot of the things i mentioned in my previous post. I also switched around the breakdown to add in the part from the beginning of the source. When you hear it, you'll see what i'm talking about. I actually like the breakdown a lot more now with that part added. I added a couple bass boosts, or bass blasts, whatever ya wanna call them, to the mix just add an extra layer to the mix. I'm think this version is sounding a lot better.


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http://ocrwip.fireslash.net/?fid=257

[SwordBreaker]

Yup. Sounds a lot better. Guitars are cleaner. The extended intro of the track sounds much better now. Keep cleaning it up, man.

As for that breakdown switch up, it sounds better than the last version. There's still something off about that part, though. Can't exactly put my finger on it. The lead guitar with the source and the rhythm guitar don't really mesh well in that part.

Still needs more source overall. Perhaps you can add certain hints of the melody and harmony of the source itself onto various parts of the track. Doesn't have to be a 1:1 copy of the source if you know what I mean...just like you did with the improved intro, source plus your original playing. Also, like I said before, I'd like more of the cool synth playing throughout the track...replacing the samples I didn't like after the first minute.

Finally, can you change up the ending? Make it more epic like the intro or something. Maybe slowing down the rhythm then ending with a fury of drum playing and an extended guitar note just like what live bands tend to do. Get me?

[Nase]

Sound: Too shrieky. I did a bit of EQing on the mp3 out of boredom yesterday, and it sounded better to me with a decent boost at 200-500 Hz and a cut at 2kHz-5kHz (IIRC).

The way it is now, the drums lack presence and the guitar riffs sound like a puddle of noise. It's hard to make out the notes at times. The EQ settings mentioned above definitely improved on that.
Try giving the drums a lower mid boost as well.

Out of interest, are you using cheap speakers? The sound makes for a slightly painful experience on decent ones.

Talking about the arrangement, some sections are awesome. Good energy in general, loving the breaks. Good drum programming.
The piece seems to lose focus during all the wankery though. The structure just feels a bit random at times, with one solo after another. I have absolutely nothing against soloing orgies, but some transitions could be better.