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Sonic Advance 'Ice Mountain'


SkyLights
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Having everything in the high range panned center or left means it's unbalanced. Even at 1:02 when the shaker-like sound comes in, there's still nothing in the high range in my right ear, which makes it feel like the stereo soundscape is leaning left. Divide things a little more between the left and right channels. Just make sure to keep kick, snare, bass, and lead in or near the center.

The 1:53 section has a couple of backing piano notes that sound out of key, clashing with the key signature of the track. Just move those notes a seminote up or down and they'll work.

It's a little repetitive in places you could have great interpretations of source. While on the topic of source, could you provide a link to source. I found a vgmusic file with it, but I'm not sure it's the right track. I tend to be source-deaf at times, and I'd rather not comment on the source 'til I'm sure I got the right source.

I like the progression... I like the whole track, it's pretty. You should be a bit more mindful of the piano's sound. Towards the end it sounds a little too loud, not its volume but its sound. The ending is also a bit sudden. Fairly hard piano notes, and then it's over. Fading velocities would be awesome there, methinks.

I think this could get YESes from the Judges after some refinements, possibly needing more source. It's got a nice sound, but it needs to be clearer imo. Cut some frequencies, fix the panning, work a little with velocities, and fix those clashing notes, and it'd be pretty good already then.

So to answer your ultimate question: you don't suck. This could be great, it's already close imo.

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I'm not too familiar with the source, but for being "terrible" this isn't half bad. It's very relaxing...I just want to chill while listening to it.

Your drums, if you hadn't intended on it, need more punch (snare and kick), even for the relaxing atmosphere you're going for. They could also change up patterns a bit more often; some fills would be nice.

Also, less reverb. on everything. Keep the delay, especially on the piano, but you don't need SO much reverb and delay...keep it simple.

I don't know if this is finished or not, but it doesn't really seem to change at all. You should try to add new sections, vary the instrumentation, you know, that terrible OC adage..."make it your own!"

In either case, this is better than you give it credit for, at least I like it. Change it up and make it even better...:)

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Wow, this is a pretty groovin source you picked. Mix sounds good, I have things to say.

ARRANGEMENT / INTERPRETATION

[bORDERLINE] Too liberal - not enough connections to the source (too much original writing)

PRODUCTION

[x] Low-quality samples

[x] Drums have no energy

PERFORMANCE (live recorded audio/MIDI parts)

[x] Wrong notes, general sloppiness (only because of the delay)

STRUCTURE

[x] Too repetitive

PERSONAL COMMENTS (positive feedback, specifics on checklist criticisms, any other thoughts)

Honestly I have to say this is a pretty strong track overall, I like the way you use dynamics. First off, that cymbal I hear at around :15 has got to go--are you going for a cymbal bell? I'm not a big fan of the choice honestly. I really dig the bassline that comes in around :45, very funky. However, not a big fan of the bass tone, sounds a bit midi-ish to my ears. Not sure how I feel about the synth that appears at 1:03, because it sounds a bit out of tune. However, I like the placement, so even if you can't tune that it's not a big deal. At 1:22, because of the delay, the F# in the lead rubs up against the G, causing it to sound sloppy. Anyway you can adjust the delay or change the rhythm of the line to prevent that from happening?

As for your drums, i feel like they're mixed too low in general, especially that snare drum. I'd like to hear a little more crack in the snare as well, perhaps a bit of compression and raising some of the highs?

Your sound palette sounds good, but it does get a bit repetitive after a while--a lot of that is due to the static drum groove you use, and that cymbal in the left channel that I hate ;). It helps that you do occasionally drop the drums, but I'd like to hear you work with changing up the groove occasionally, just to keep it fresh. Perhaps at the end, before the solo piano stuff.

As for arrangement, I think it's really clever the way you wrote the melody. However, through this whole mix, I do only hear that melody once. I think the rest of the mix is very cohesive to the original in terms of chord structure and melodic/rhythmic motif usage...but part of me feels like that melody should get a little more attention than it's given. I'll leave that up to you.

All in all this is a very well put together track. You don't suck, you're actually pretty good :D

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Wow, that was a great game.

I think the track is really good for a first post. Around 1:40 - 2:10 ish, I could have used something... more. It was missing something as simple as a little more volume from the relaxed strings part, something as kind of a filler in the mid range, to help the melody not stick out as much.

I definitely agree with others, the piano part at the end should decrease in dynamics slowly toward the end of the piece. Not even so much in volume, just adjust the samples you're using (not sure which piano synth you've got going here) to give the sound that a real piano player would use when "pressing" (for lack of a better word) the keys rather than striking them. Its hard to describe, it just needs to mellow out a bit more at the end.

Overall though, I'd say this is very nice from a production standpoint, and definitely a better first try than I could have done.

To comment on the source material, the percussion is perfect. This is my absolute favorite track from one of my favorite sonic games, so I know it very well, and the percussion really needs to be just where it is for this kind of an arrangement. Its kind of out of the way, the focus of the original just used the percussion to keep a beat going really, the focus of the piece is really on the string parts.

Just noticed this as I was listening, you have a diminished piano chord at around 1:50 that sounds very out of place, you might want to either look into changing the chord, or the material around the chord to put it more in place if you planned it that way.

I love the use of the source material. You varied it, but only just enough, so that I was able to catch where every part of the mix came from, but it still had that kind of fresh vibe that I can only seem to find in a remix.

My suggestions are just to increase the quality of the samples a bit, especially on the piano synth since it seems to be the main focus of the mix. Other than that, it seems very solid to me. Good job!

-thegamefreak

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  • 1 month later...

All production values aside (as I have no knowledge of any music theory, etc) I came across this song while I was working yesterday and I just have to say that I really enjoy what you have here. I hope that you continue to work on this piece and hopefully get it submitted. I would love to see this finished and polished up! :razz:

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