Jump to content

Review a game in three sentences


Zipp
 Share

Recommended Posts

Zelda 2:

I LOVE this game.

Sadly for me, it hates me, oh it hates me with a passion. It's the most brutal and unforgiving zelda game that exists and that will ever exist, but also it gives me the best feeling of accomplishment when I finally beat it.

Really?

It's my favorite Zelda game but I find it incredibly easy. I can get to the final palace in one sitting, and playing it enough makes it very easy to remember the simple path through the maze.

And then there's shadow link. Ehhh...

Great game? Agreed. Difficult? Not at all.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Really?

It's my favorite Zelda game but I find it incredibly easy. I can get to the final palace in one sitting, and playing it enough makes it very easy to remember the simple path through the maze.

And then there's shadow link. Ehhh...

Great game? Agreed. Difficult? Not at all.

I play this game once every 1 or 2 years, so when I come back to it I have forgotten mostly everything, yeah my memory sucks. Anyways I said it was the most difficult and brutal ZELDA game, which really can't be argued. There are many more dificult games out there, specially on the NES.

I find bionic commando and ninja gaiden 3 easy, because I've played them to death. Most people have nightmares trying to beat them.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Chrono Cross

Together with Xenosaga, this is Square Enix's most convoluted plot line... which puts it high in the running for most convoluted plot of all time. Despite suspicions, I didn't actually like Chrono Cross. I have to admit to getting choked up quite often during it, but that was an effect of the beautiful music, not because anything interesting was actually happening on screen.

5/10

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This one's gonna be reviewed as dialogue...

<b>METAL GEAR SOLID 4: GUNS OF THE PATRIOTS</b>

SUNNY: It is my life's dream to cook eggs.

NAOMI: to cook eggs you must be careful not to let them burn.

SUNNY: wow, your tits are huge.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ok, I'll bite.

Final Fantasy VIII:

Extremely abusable junctioning/magic system. I mean, stabbing yourself and healing for 5000 hp? ...whatever.

how about 2xCut with Ice junctioned to Elemental on the Ultima Weapon while wearing Aurora Armlet for 19998 HP healing in FFVII

^ this is how I got through most of the battle arena with just Cloud

also sprint shoes

Link to comment
Share on other sites

how about 2xCut with Ice junctioned to Elemental on the Ultima Weapon while wearing Aurora Armlet for 19998 HP healing in FFVII

^ this is how I got through most of the battle arena with just Cloud

also sprint shoes

Not as easily abusable as the junction system overall, though. I didn't even mention the "Recover" and "Revive" skills you can use for free once you learn them.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

how about 2xCut with Ice junctioned to Elemental on the Ultima Weapon while wearing Aurora Armlet for 19998 HP healing in FFVII

^ this is how I got through most of the battle arena with just Cloud

also sprint shoes

I just linked Knights of The Round with HP Absorb. xD

For Jenova Synthesis i had counter linked with deathblow. xD

Link to comment
Share on other sites

wait somebody said SoM had something bad

how is that possible

I tried really, really hard to like the game, to be completely honest. In keeping with good spirits of the premise of this thread, I will try to sum up in further detail why I think this game sucks in 3 sentences:

Leveling up magic is a tedious pain in the ass unless you enjoy casting spells repeatedly for hours on end even when they have no effect whatsoever, and it doesn't make things much better when your comrades keep running directly into rocks/mushrooms for 30 seconds before realizing that they are idiots and you are trying to actually go somewhere. The personalities of each of the party members is downright uninteresting, and additionally they don't seem to be able to battle very effectively since half the time when you seemingly hit an enemy right in the center it acts as if your attack was non-existent. The soundtrack had a few really good tracks (namely the banished and pandora themes), but unfortunately the ones you hear the majority of the time, such as the battle themes and most village/overworld themes, annoyed me to no end.

Terribly structured sentences, I know, but I was trying to fit a lot into a little, and I had even more but those were the big ones. Also, like I said it had Santa so it's not all bad.

For what it's worth I think a lot of the remixes here from the game kick large amounts of ass.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sonic Unleashed

Daytime stages are ZOOM ZOOM WHEEEEEEE. Nighttime stages beg for a Knuckles appearance. Severely underrated game.

7.9/10

Custom Battler Bomberman (or Bomberman 2, in Europe. lol what name)

It's Bomberman. Just with custom parts. And a health bar.

9/10

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...