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Jet Force Gemini - White Bear Rescue


phantasia
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First off let me say that Water Ruins is my favourite track from this game, so I'm excited that you're attempting a remix!

Definitely not a disappointment either, I love the sadness of this track and the instrument choices are great. That acoustic guitar is beautifully played in the intro, and nicely recorded too. I noticed that you used the same ambience sound (0:02, 0:11) in this mix and your other one though - probably worth changing one of them up ;)

The time signature change at 1:04 I think could benefit from some percussion to help it along for those unfamiliar with the source - it almost seems like it's a different tune. Just something subtle to switch between whatever crazy time signature the start is (any idea? I don't have a clue...) to the normal 4/4.

A problem I think with playing the guitar live and the rest digital is that at some points the guitar sounds too loose within the mix. I reckon you could get away with more reverb/echo on some of the digital instruments to make them spread out a little more and fit better with the guitar. I think changing that bass to a cello might work out nicely too.

Really like the long claps every 8 beats - it's like the tribals are chipping away in the mine. Same with the industrial whirrs and ambience in the intro.

Great fingerpicking section around 1:57, I'd like to hear more of this, and more acoustic guitar. You could definitely get a solo in there, Rodrigo Y Gabriela style. Give it a try!

Looking forward to hearing more.

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Huge update. I added some pretty crazy guitar stuff I recorded (some pretty loose from the source, but at least Liontamers 50%-rule is followed), and also tried to sort of connect with the beginning of the song. Don't know if that was redundant. What do you think?

Many thanks for listening and commenting! :)

EDIT (important transition fix):

http://tindeck.com/listen/cuir

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Wow, big improvement! My favourite bit is 2:43-3:06. That guitar has a harp-like sound to it, and the marching band snare is great. Really like the slow section after that, and then the solo is cool too.

The solo definitely needs more backing than just the strings and cymbal though - maybe some of the mining sounds from the start to tie it in to the end? Certainly a bit more percussion. I think the ending feels too separate from the rest of the piece, although you did stray from the source with the solo so it's a good idea to tie it back to the start in some way.

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Thank you Darksim for your comment, I agree with you. Therefore - another update where I added some pretty crazy mining fx percussion for the solo and outro to connect those two. I hope it worked out.

Critique away! Good/bad/ulgy/cool/awkward/odd/awesome/pro/newb/lulz. Whatever comment you have, it's welcome.

http://tindeck.com/listen/wkem

Thx.

(btw, original song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji8OG3KwoHA)

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  • 4 weeks later...

So happy to see this being updated, and glad you added a few of my suggestions too! That guitar playing is so nice, it fits in really well with the rest of the instruments now, and the percussion is spot on. The snare rolls gave me goosebumps!

Not really sure if I can give you any more ideas really. It sounds like you've got the feel of the track perfectly - the struggle of the enslaved tribals working in the mine - and so I say good luck with submission :D

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very awesome concept here! you've adapted and personalized the source really well. the guitar and percussion are mixed pretty well for the most part but that string sample strikes me as unrealistic. i also felt like that section with the string countermelody (let's see.. 1:08-3:07) went on a bit too long- it was the only part of the song that started to lose me. the changeup at 1:55 was good but then it's more of the same until 3:07. i think this whole section could have built up a little faster. the long cello notes in the next section sound nice.

as far as the rest of the track goes, i think it's all pretty great. i'm on the fence about this one because the arrangement is brilliant but it just feels kind of.. sparse. i can't quite put my finger on it, tbh, but it's a lurking suspicion.

anyway, i personally enjoyed this quite a bit. take these crits as you will, and best of luck when you decide to submit! :nicework:

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As far as samples go, I have to side with halc on this. The string samples are a bit weak at times. I'll go a bit further and say that the bass could probably be a little bit stronger, but except for the intro when you're playing high notes with the bass, it's not really an issue and I think the judges would probably be willing to let it slide. But the synthy strings definitely don't fit in here and that sample issue definitely needs to be fixed. Cello notes sound good though :-)

The mix reminds me a lot of zyko's work - very personalized and human, very organic, rough-around-the-edges performance and production. It sounds like I'm bashing on your mix but really, I think these qualities serve to enhance it, not detract. I enjoyed your remix very much but there's a chance that, even if you fixed the strings issue, it might be a bit too rough for the judges. I hope not, but there's a chance.

If I were you, I'd fix the strings, then submit it and see how it goes. If it passes the panel, then cool! If not, you can cross the resub bridge when you come to it.

Good luck! Awesome remix :-)

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Thanks for the crits and comments :). I've been working a bit on a new version, with some remakes in the section halc mentioned. Not sure it'll be good though, but I'm experimenting a bit.

I'm a bit suprised about the string comments, since my samples are from EWQLG orchestral ;p. Perhaps there are better samples. I could try finding some.

Anyways, I'll soon be gone for a few weeks on vacation, but update will come when I get home :)

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Hmm... Well, I still agree with halc that the section with the string countermelodies gets to be plodding and a bit overlong, but ultimately I think this is a very enjoyable remix and it deserves to see the light of day, so I say submit it :-) You definitely tightened up the strings so I think you've got a fighting chance with the panel. It's kind of a borderline call, but in this case I'd say go for it! :-)

Best of luck to ya!

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sorry about the delay getting back to you on this :P

good improvements over the last version. still can't say that string sample is perfect but it does sound better than the last version. i think you could fatten it up just a little more with some stereo spread perhaps, but I wouldn't consider it a dealbreaker if you left it as is.

aside from that, i'm pretty much loving this. best of luck on the panel- hoping to see it on the frontpage! :D

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