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*NO* Final Fantasy 'The White Rider'


DragonAvenger
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Name: The White Rider

Your ReMixer name: Brandon Strader

Your real name: Brandon E. Strader

Your email address: oinkness@gmail.com

Your website: http://www.bstrader.net/

Your userid: 3123

Name of game(s) arranged: Final Fantasy

Name of individual song(s) arranged: Airship

Squaresoft; 1987

Hi. I hope you don't mind that this last batch of submissions were all from FF1 project. I just haven't had a chance to work on anything else lately.

I actually used the "updated" version of this song (GBA, PSX, etc) as a reference. It's a little slower than the NES version, but I think I mainly focused on the melodies that were in the NES version. Hey, we used both versions of the soundtrack when making the FF1 album. :-)

So I'm going to copy/paste what I already wrote in the artist comments for this song for the project, but also possibly give some additional insight. Here goes:

"If you had asked me in January 2010 (at the start of the FF1 project) which song I would end up doing, Airship wouldn't have been it. It wasn't even on my radar. I love every song from FF1 -except- for Airship. At least, I used to dislike it. I made a mix for Airship that ended up being far too much like "dark pop", so I scrapped that and redid a new version of the song. The idea this time was to do something in the realm of power metal, though I don't think it actually came out that way. I wrote joke lyrics and did vocals, but they "made" the song so I just had to keep them. The first riff with the lead from the source sets the tone. In the following verse riff, the vocals sing the lead from the source. The chorus is original, but it doesn't linger on that for too long. The White Rider was a joy to make, and I hope it gives people a little chuckle -- while they bob their heads! The title is a tribute to the band Camel, with the excerpt titled The White Rider from their brilliant 1974 album, "Mirage"."

Ok, a little additional insight I guess. Source breakdown; bubbly synth echo-ey intro, some powerchords (just some tension building stuff really, if you guys need me to chop the tension bits off for source reasons, aight) then it hits the rockin' bit with the source melody. Then it drops into the verse where the guitars are playing the source rhythm and the vocals are following the source lead melody. The chorus bit was original, but hey, you've GOT to have a chorus for a rock song, and there was nothing left to use in the source. Already used the source, basically twice, for that first riff then the verse and bridge bit. So yeah, rock song layout, verse, bridge, chorus, with that added lead source bit for the opening and closing, the "tension building" riff again at the end silenced quickly by a record needle noise. Shoutout to OA who suggested ending it like that to cut down on some of the time and not fade out with the echoey synth. I also chopped about half of the echoey intro too, just to get into the song faster. I probably wouldn't have really subbed this except OA said it was passable, so I was encouraged.. Hope ya'll enjoy it and the album. o_o

Oh yeah, the lyrics..

Now we're flying through the air without a care

On a ship made out of wood, who knows how it works!?

Flying through the sky....

If we fight then we may die...

If we stay up here we're safe,

To avoid the trolls and the snakes!

As we chose to fly above,

The ones below us are breathing their last breaths

We are focused on our goal

A task we must complete without regrets

Parking our ship in a field, we take a stroll

Coming up to meet us there is a filthy troll!!!

I whip out my sword...

To embrace the monster horde...

Black Mage casts a spell

To send them all to burning hell!

Then we chose to fly above,

The ones below us are breathing their last breaths

We are focused on our goal

A task we must complete without regrets

-------------------------------------

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  • 2 weeks later...

Nice arrangement, and the new chorus fits pretty well. I'm glad you trimmed the intro and outro, making the overall length contain more source. THe original airship wasn't my absoluter favorite, but it was a good enough track, and you've added some pretty humorous lyrics (i liked the shoutout to Nekofrog in verse 2! :-) ), and a pretty nice vibe overall.

Production was clear, and the vocals are prominently featured. You played within your capabilities, and overall I really dig the uniqueness of the track.

Yes

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  • 1 month later...

Yeah, the vocals are too dry and upfront. There's also some light but pronounced lisping going on, IMO, though it makes the performance sound kind of Euro. That said, this was still put together well enough production-wise to be passable. The arrangement was pretty solid. Cool shot going for the PlayStation soundtrack instead of the NES one; you can definitely hear the influence of that.

However, the source check didn't work out. There's a lot of Final Fantasy in this, just not enough to make the source material the dominant aspect of the track.

The track was 4:17-long, so I needed 128.5 seconds of overt source use for the source material to be dominant:

31.5-1:01, 1:03.5-1:21.5, 1:22.75-1:25.75, 1:26.75-1:34, 2:07.5-2:25.5, 2:27-2:29.75, 2:31-2:37, 3:11-3:41 = 105.5 seconds or 41% source usage.

So basically, there's an extended original intro (31.5 sec), 2 extended original choruses (33.5sec & 34sec) and an extended outro (36sec) that add up to more than half the track. You should find a way to incorporate some supporting writing from the source into some of the wholly original sections you have. "There was nothing left to use in the source" is not a valid explanation. :lol: You could easily take the riff at :12 of the source, slow it down and use it in the background of your chorus vocals, or any number of other options.

Good track, Brandon, it just needs more source usage woven in during the original sections to put it over the top.

NO (resubmit)

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Wow. Those vocals are so.....not metal. I think the track is pretty good, well-mixed, but the vocal is so inappropriate. Your voice really doesn't fit the genre, and it's not mixed appropriately either. You ought to try bringing down the lead vocal and making it wetter.

Sorry to say it, but I think the vocal is killing this mix.

NO

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  • 2 months later...

Drums and guitars sound solid here, though the kick might be a too loud, and the drums as a whole sound too compressed (especially on the crash.) Guitar performances are also good. I don't think the vocal 'kills' this mix but I agree that it seems too dry, not compressed and not up front enough. I actually think I heard some clipping too around 2:24? A lot of the track during the vocals sounded sparse to me also, just single rhythm guitar notes and simple drums. I would have loved to hear more pads, instruments or other textures.

As it is, it seems very minimal except for the parts with the vocal harmonies & lead guitar. I also agree with Larry that there's too much original material between the intro and original choruses. I'm not opposed to original choruses (did it with Kindred) but there needs to be more stuff from the source tune. Maybe try a rhythmic change for example as opposed to basically playing it back as-is.

NO

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Pretty good! Vocals need to sit in the mix better; too dry, but a good performance.

Original sections need some source usage to put it over the top. If you can't find material in the source tune you've picked, go back to the rest of the soundtrack and pull something out of there; no reason to have completely original sections when there's so much material in the FF soundtrack to draw from.

I like it, but needs more source. NO

Oh, also, Larry, not counting the time between things like 1:25.75—1:26.75 is silly. :P

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Gotta agree with Jesse that the vocal didn't suit the style for me, and I hate making that criticism because there's only so much people can do with their own voices. This needed a more powerful take to match the rawk, maybe even bringing it an octave up if you can hit those notes. I thought the choruses did a much better job by bringing in harmonies, that gave it more depth. However, that's not even the biggest issue; the amount of original material in this is problematic and makes the source less than dominant. Can't sign off on it, which is too bad, because I do think apart from the vocal delivery, it's a cool song.

NO (resubmit)

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  • 1 month later...

Oh man, this sounds like a mashup rather than an actual metal mix. Like the vocals have been taken from a folksong and mixed with a metal song.

I want to list the little problems I have with the song that aren't the vocals, I think people have said enough about that.

The drums. Just because it's a metal song, it doesn't mean your kick has to be dry and flat. A lot of people have a problem with the kick drum in metal and rock pieces. The problem is that you end up with a nice full song due to the guitar, and a really dry popping noise in the background from the kickdrum. I'm not sure how to explain what you can do to improve it, but listen to some pro-bands and compare your kick to theirs. I know yours is scripted rather than played live, but it can still sound realistic.

The other thing is the toms. Beef them up. Toms are the power behind a drumtrack. Make them sound nice and full so those breakdowns come out and really catch your attention.

I don't want to reject this, because everything in the mix that I have issue with comes down to personal taste. The source was apparent enough for me, I'm not going to go into percentages like Larry does. I know it's going to cause a tie-up in the votes, but I think it's good enough to pass.

YES

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