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OCR Mascot Bios - 20 more up for grabs!


Dafydd
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Presenting Mark VII of the bio

---

*whistles*

Sometime before Dr. Thomas Light created Mega Man, he began work on a prototype robot. This subject, Proto Man, was Light's first creation, and fled the lab for personal reasons despite not being fully completed. After some time, the evil Dr. Albert Wily found him in a state of disrepair and mended him, upgrading his combat systems in the process. Under the alias Break Man, he put these new weapons to use in an attempt to stop Mega Man in Mega Man 3. Despite these initial confrontations, he quit helping Dr. Wily during the events of the fourth game, when Wily kidnapped a young girl to blackmail her father. Proto Man saved the girl, allowing his "little brother" to stop Wily. After that, Proto Man took a neutral approach to the conflicts started by the bat-haired maniac, only interfering when he felt it was absolutely necessary.

Proto Man is often seen wearing his trademark black shades and a slick yellow scarf, and he almost always hides his brown hair under his helmet. He also is known to whistle to announce his arrival before he shows up. He prefers more mysterious clothing while dressing casually, such as trenchcoats and slacks. These facets of his character work collectively to uphold the aura of coolness he continually projects. He feels conflicted in regards to the ongoing war between Dr. Light and Dr. Wily; one is to thank for giving him life and the other is responsible for saving it, yet the two are constantly at odds with each other. Proto Man seldom keeps in contact with those concerned about him, but he always looks out for Mega Man; after all, isn't that his duty as the older brother?

http://wiki.themmnetwork.com/index.php?title=Proto_Man

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Proto_Man

Edited by Mirby
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Taking Arthur. Already added a quote (from MvC3) and refs: http://ocremix.org/info/Arthur

It gets a bit list-y, but its not a bad start. :-)

Bring on the edit recs!

Whenever his beloved princess is in distress, there is no one nobler to come to her rescue than the gallant Sir Arthur. Armed with his trusty javelin, Arthur has repeatedly braved the forces of darkness, venturing out into the ghoulish realms to take on zombies, dragons, gargoyles, and other fiendish foes.

Along with the javelin, the hard-charging knight can stock up on torches, swords, crossbows, and more, each with their own unique demon-fighting properties. During battle, if Arthur takes damage without first upgrading his suit of armor, he'll lose the suit and be forced to persevere in nothing but his shorts! When wearing some higher classes of plate, however, Arthur can withstand more hits, as well as channel magic into his weaponry to make his attacks even more potent.

Only by smashing through the monstrous hordes can the heroic Arthur gain the keys to the gates in his path and deliver the princess from the clutches of evil. Whether his kingdom is endangered by the likes of Sardius, Loki, or the Goblin King, nothing will prevent this determined warrior from reaching the damsel, saving the day, and adding to his legend. Even if he has to do it twice. Ho!

EDIT: Ain't no one banning ME from attempting a bio. :-) Seriously though, this should be relatively minimal edit work (the game plots are all the same, i.e. barebones story, rescue the princess) and will take one off the list.

IMO, I'd also say let Polo work on Bayonetta; he's a great editor and should make it quick. Also, some of the other in-progress ones are in limbo, so I don't see the point in holding back the productive from other work.

Edited by Liontamer
bio edits per Polo & Darklink's critique
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"Before Dr. Thomas Light built Mega Man, he was working on a prototype robot. This subject, Proto Man, fled the lab for personal reasons despite not being completed yet."

Would this also solve the issue with the word "different"?

I like "prototype robot". But why the change to "subject" and losing "over a misunderstanding"? I would prefer something closer to what we had before. Something like...

"Before Dr. Thomas Light built Mega Man, he was working on a prototype robot. This robot, Proto Man, was the first of his creations, but before he could finish his work, Proto Man fled the lab over a misunderstanding."

Buuuut then we have "Proto Man" twice in that sentence, and "robot" twice in very close proximity, so that's not quite it either.

"Stop" and "stopped" are far too close together for my liking. Perhaps change the second instance to "quit"? Also, I suggest dropping the word "out", resulting in "he quit helping Dr. Wily during the events of the fourth game".
Nice catch. I thought I had mentioned "out" earlier, but apparently not. Personally, I don't like the sound of "quit helping" other than as an imperative, but that's really just me.
During his battles, if Arthur takes a hit without first upgrading his armor, he'll lose his suit of armor and be forced to persevere in nothing but his shorts! Yet when equipped with a higher class of armor, Arthur can absorb more enemy firepower as well as channel magic into his weaponry, making his attacks even more potent.
That's a lot of "armor" in a short piece of text. Try to reduce the repetition by substituting for something else. "When equipped with a higher class of armor" might be replaced by "when clad in finer steel" or something to that effect (I'm guessing steel probably doesn't cover all the options). That last sentence could stand to be a little shorter anyway.
the Goblin King, Loki, or Sardius

I had to read the sources to figure out whether the Goblin King and Loki were the same guy or not. Changing the order so that the Goblin King comes last would resolve any ambiguity.

Ho!

What is this word even meant to mean in this context? I thought it meant something along the lines of "hello" or "halt". Did you just throw that in there?

Other than that, :nicework:!

EDIT: Ain't no one banning ME from attempting a bio. :-) Seriously though, this should be relatively minimal edit work (the game plots are all the same, i.e. barebones story, rescue the princess) and will take one off the list.

IMO, I'd also say let Polo work on Bayonetta; he's a great editor and should make it quick. Also, some of the other in-progress ones are in limbo, so I don't see the point in holding back the productive from other work.

Well then, the ban is removed. No sense in having it there if it all it does is give site staff a chance to skip in front (not that there's a line that I know of!).

Edited by Dafydd
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Ho, when used as an exclamation, is the equivalent of saying "let's go" or "off we go." I'm not 100% but I think it might just be a shortened version of "tally-ho." According to the wise sage Wik E'Pedia, that was a phrase used in fox hunting to excite the hounds into the chase. So not terribly far off from how it's being used in this context. In the case of the bio, I'm not sure why it's included. I feel like there should be a destination or action included before the word, as an indicator of what is being exclaimed. ("Adventure, ho!" or "Off to the rescue. Ho!" for example) Unless that's a trademark thing Arthur says.

Also, LT, I have a question about the armor. I've only really watched review shows about the games (they were way too difficult for me as a kid), but isn't true at least of the first two or three that Arthur's armor always falls off after just one hit?

Edit: Ninja edits are ninja.

Edited by Darklink42
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Ho, when used as an exclamation, is the equivalent of saying "let's go" or "off we go." I'm not 100% but I think it might just be a shortened version of "tally-ho." According to the wise sage Wik E'Pedia, that was a phrase used in fox hunting to excite the hounds into the chase. So not terribly far off from how it's being used in this context.
I had a talk with the same sage, but didn't see anything that could be interpreted as "let's go". But in that case, it makes sense.
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Would it help to rearrange the two lists so they aren't in close proximity to one another? It doesn't read like there's too much listing to me, just that the two sentences which do it come right after one another.

Also, some further thoughts on the exclamation are above, but shortly before you posted, Dafydd. My bad.

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Would it help to rearrange the two lists so they aren't in close proximity to one another? It doesn't read like there's too much listing to me, just that the two sentences which do it come right after one another.

I didn't even notice that, heh. Maybe it's the excellent "fiendish foes" ending of the first one that throws me off guard.

"Adventure, ho!"

Yeah, that's more like how I've heard it before, specifically "Land, ho!", which I always took as more of a "Hey guys, I can see land!" than "Hey guys, let's get ashore!", but the two may very well be equivalent in most situations.

Edited by Dafydd
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That's a lot of "armor" in a short piece of text. Try to reduce the repetition by substituting for something else. "When equipped with a higher class of armor" might be replaced by "when clad in finer steel" or something to that effect (I'm guessing steel probably doesn't cover all the options anyway). That last sentence could stand to be a little shorter anyway.

Cool. I edited things above.

I had to read the sources to figure out whether the Goblin King and Loki were the same guy or not. Changing the order so that the Goblin King comes last would resolve any ambiguity.

NP; reversed the order.

Ho, when used as an exclamation, is the equivalent of saying "let's go" or "off we go." I'm not 100% but I think it might just be a shortened version of "tally-ho." According to the wise sage Wik E'Pedia, that was a phrase used in fox hunting to excite the hounds into the chase. So not terribly far off from how it's being used in this context. In the case of the bio, I'm not sure why it's included. I feel like there should be a destination or action included before the word, as an indicator of what is being exclaimed. ("Adventure, ho!" or "Off to the rescue. Ho!" for example) Unless that's a trademark thing Arthur says.

It is indeed something Arthur says. :-)

http://marvelvscapcom.wikia.com/wiki/Special_Conversations#Arthur_5

Either way, it was just a way to add in something he says and finish strong. I could replace it with "Hohaha!" and/or move it to the beginning. But yeah, it's something he says that's just short for "Tally ho!"

Also, LT, I have a question about the armor. I've only really watched review shows about the games (they were way too difficult for me as a kid), but isn't true at least of the first two or three that Arthur's armor always falls off after just one hit?

Much of the time that's true. But in the latter 2 games in the series (Super and Ultimate), certain armors allow Arthur to absorb more than 1 hit before he loses it.

In Ghouls'n Ghosts, his upgraded armor still goes after one hit, but in Super Ghouls'n Ghosts, the gold armor comes with a shield that can absorb an additional hit (and there's an even better shield than can take 3 additional hits).

In Ultimate Ghosts'n Goblins, he can just take multiple hits by default, but having something better than the default steel armor allows him to take even more.

I added the parenthetical about the shield to clarify it a bit without getting too specific about the game it happens in, but if anyone thinks further clarification is needed, run some edit suggestions by me.

Would it help to rearrange the two lists so they aren't in close proximity to one another? It doesn't read like there's too much listing to me, just that the two sentences which do it come right after one another.

I'm not bothered by it myself, but if you have a edit rec to address it and it works better, we can roll with that.

Edited by Liontamer
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(Calling for help) Ho!
"Calling for help"? Is that really how you want to end the bio? :lol:
I added the parenthetical about the shield to clarify it a bit without getting too specific about the game it happens in, but if anyone thinks further clarification is needed, run some edit suggestions by me.
It's not too specific to mention the shield, but "With the aid of a shield" should be modified to say "sometimes with the aid of a shield", if it's not always the case. Also, you might not want to say "if Arthur takes a hit without first upgrading his suit of armor" if the number of hits varies depending on the game. "A beating" is unspecific enough to get the message across without giving an actual number (but it can still mean one).

I realize now that I read "absorb more enemy firepower as well as channel magic into his weaponry" as Arthur being able to use his shield to absorb magic and reroute it into his weapon, which I'm guessing is not correct. At any rate, I don't think "firepower" covers melee attacks.

I'm not bothered by it myself, but if you have a edit rec to address it and it works better, we can roll with that.
Any ideas, DarkLink42? I'm pretty happy with it as it is, but I'm open to ideas.

Oh, and, what does "rec" mean?

Edited by Dafydd
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"Calling for help"? Is that really how you want to end the bio? :lol:

Sure. "Calling for help" refers to the game mechanic being used when the quote happens, but if you read through the other assist calls for MvC3, they're not all framed as distress calls. In a lot of cases, the character says something strong/heroic, as in Arthur's case.

It's not too specific to mention the shield, but "With the aid of a shield" should be modified to say "sometimes with the aid of a shield", if it's not always the case. Also, you might not want to say "if Arthur takes a hit without first upgrading his suit of armor" if the number of hits varies depending on the game. "A beating" is unspecific enough to get the message across without giving an actual number (but it can still mean one).

I realize now that I read "absorb more enemy firepower as well as channel magic into his weaponry" as Arthur being able to use his shield to absorb magic and reroute it into his weapon, which I'm guessing is not correct. At any rate, I don't think "firepower" covers melee attacks.

Changing "a hit" to "damage" keeps the amount of hits non-specific, so I'll roll with that.

Then changing "enemy firepower" to "hits" makes it clearer that he's not redirecting energy.

Oh, and, what does "rec" mean?

Recommendations.

Edited by Liontamer
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why the change to "subject" and losing "over a misunderstanding"?

On the first point, it's for variety, i.e. to avoid saying "robot" twice so close together (as you've found). On the second point, something feels missing with just "Proto Man fled the lab over a misunderstanding." It's like, who gave him the misunderstanding and why is it important? If we explain it, we run the risk of making this too similar to the first source again. "Personal reasons" gives readers something to ponder without confusing them, I think.

More for Prot. Ma.:

- "when Wily kidnapped a young girl" --> Just so Wily's name doesn't appear three times close together, change this name drop to "the mad doctor" or something.

- "He feels conflicted in regards to the ongoing war between Dr. Light and Dr. Wily; one is to thank for giving him life and the other is responsible for saving it, yet the two are constantly at odds with each other." --> We decided this passage should go 1) because it bears strong similarities to the source's wording and 2) it's redundant to bring up the fact that Light and Wily both had a hand in Proto Man's creation when it's mentioned in the first paragraph. (His conflicted feelings are interesting, but they can't stand on their own without the dynamic between the doctors.)

Some notes for Mr. Psycho Underpants:

- "Along with the standard javelin" --> You already say "trusty javelin" earlier, so "standard" feels a little unnecessary (although it is true Arthur starts with it in every game).

- "can also can" --> As you can see, there's two cans here, but I recommend cutting "also" as well to avoid the impression that the javelin is another item picked up.

- "When wearing a higher class of plate however" --> Another comma after "plate" would make this clause better paced/sectioned.

- "absorb more hits" --> Does Arthur really withstand/defend against/take (more) hits with the aid of armor/a shield? "Absorb" makes me think of "taking outside influences into oneself to grow stronger" more than "protection."

- "with the aid of a shield" --> This seems to imply the shield has to come with every armor type to offer mandatory protection. I'm thinking "which a shield also helps with" or "a shield also helps with this" would be a more workable phrasing.

- "as well as channel magic into his weaponry, making his attacks even more potent" --> Due to the way this part of the sentence is divided/arranged, the "attack potency" ending seems to suggest Arthur's strong attacks are bound up in taking more hits. Try (starting with a comma): ", and he can channel magic into his weaponry to make his attacks even more potent."

- "gain the keys to the gates" --> Do you mean the gates at the ends of levels? Right now it sounds like the gates are belatedly important without being delineated as boss-triggered unlockables to new areas.

- "return the princess from the clutches of evil" --> It may be a tad cliché, but "save" the princess feels like a better verb choice. "Return" almost sounds like she's a misplaced UPS package or a chess piece gone astray.

Other than that, awesome work. I like how the bio gives no hint of the insane difficulty of the series. :P

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And now, Mark VIII of the bio, AKA the one where they say DOCTOR WIWWY

Perhaps we can finish this before we need a MARK IX: THE AMBITIOUS REVIVAL

---

*whistles*

Sometime before Dr. Thomas Light created Mega Man, he began work on a prototype robot. This subject, Proto Man, was Light's first creation, and fled the lab for personal reasons despite not being fully completed. After some time, the evil Dr. Albert Wily found him in a state of disrepair and mended him, upgrading his combat systems in the process. Under the alias Break Man, he put these new weapons to use in an attempt to stop Mega Man in Mega Man 3. Despite these initial confrontations, he quit helping Dr. Wily during the events of the fourth game, when the mad doctor kidnapped a young girl to blackmail her father. Proto Man saved the girl, allowing his "little brother" to stop Wily. After that, Proto Man took a neutral approach to the conflicts started by the bat-haired maniac, only interfering when he felt it was absolutely necessary.

Proto Man is often seen wearing his trademark black shades and a slick yellow scarf, and he almost always hides his brown hair under his helmet. He also is known to whistle to announce his arrival before he shows up. He prefers more mysterious clothing while dressing casually, such as trenchcoats and slacks. These facets of his character work collectively to uphold the aura of coolness he continually projects. Proto Man seldom keeps in contact with those concerned about him, but he always looks out for Mega Man; after all, isn't that his duty as the older brother?

http://wiki.themmnetwork.com/index.php?title=Proto_Man

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Proto_Man

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Some notes for Mr. Psycho Underpants:

- "Along with the standard javelin" --> You already say "trusty javelin" earlier, so "standard" feels a little unnecessary (although it is true Arthur starts with it in every game).

Done.

- "can also can" --> As you can see, there's two cans here, but I recommend cutting "also" as well to avoid the impression that the javelin is another item picked up.

Done.

- "When wearing a higher class of plate however" --> Another comma after "plate" would make this clause better paced/sectioned.

Done.

- "absorb more hits" --> Does Arthur really withstand/defend against/take (more) hits with the aid of armor/a shield? "Absorb" makes me think of "taking outside influences into oneself to grow stronger" more than "protection."

Tweaked it. Yes, he can take more hits.

- "with the aid of a shield" --> This seems to imply the shield has to come with every armor type to offer mandatory protection. I'm thinking "which a shield also helps with" or "a shield also helps with this" would be a more workable phrasing.

Clarified it with "sometimes" and dropped the shield mention.

- "as well as channel magic into his weaponry, making his attacks even more potent" --> Due to the way this part of the sentence is divided/arranged, the "attack potency" ending seems to suggest Arthur's strong attacks are bound up in taking more hits. Try (starting with a comma): ", and he can channel magic into his weaponry to make his attacks even more potent."

Tweaked it.

- "gain the keys to the gates" --> Do you mean the gates at the ends of levels? Right now it sounds like the gates are belatedly important without being delineated as boss-triggered unlockables to new areas.

Yeah, that's what I'm referring to. They're only important in the sense that he's just getting through the end of each area. Tweaked it to "numerous gates," though that may affect the reading flow of the sentence; it ultimately seems alright to me, but if there's any edit suggestions there, let me know.

- "return the princess from the clutches of evil" --> It may be a tad cliché, but "save" the princess feels like a better verb choice. "Return" almost sounds like she's a misplaced UPS package or a chess piece gone astray.

OK, she's now a UPS package. Changed "return" to "deliver" a la "deliver us from evil". I mentioned "saving the day" later, so I'll prevent the chance of using the verb twice.

Other than that, awesome work. I like how the bio gives no hint of the insane difficulty of the series. :P

Arthur doesn't bitch. Added a sentence at the end to allude to that (can tweak if needed).

Edited by Liontamer
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Any ideas, DarkLink42? I'm pretty happy with it as it is, but I'm open to ideas.

As far as the listy-ness goes, I think it works together. I tried some different combinations, but LT has a pretty good flow going in this bio, so breaking it up worked worse any way it went.

The only edit I have a suggestion for is the phrase "Numerous gates", which was just added. It makes sense to me, but the sentence as is leaves their purpose and placement somewhat ambiguous. Adding something like "...gates in his path..." or "...gates blocking his way..." would help clarify it without making it run overly long.

Nice touch, by the way, with the second to last sentence LT. It's a good, subtle wink to the player and a hint to future players. :nicework:

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The only edit I have a suggestion for is the phrase "Numerous gates", which was just added. It makes sense to me, but the sentence as is leaves their purpose and placement somewhat ambiguous. Adding something like "...gates in his path..." or "...gates blocking his way..." would help clarify it without making it run overly long.

"Gates in his path" works for me.

Awaiting any edits and/or signoff from Dafydd y Polo. [sic]

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Smooth revisions on Arthur. Looks ready for uploading, IMO.

OK, she's now a UPS package. Changed "return" to "deliver" a la "deliver us from evil".

Ha ha ha. "Deliver (from evil)" actually does work better. Hadn't thought of that.

I mentioned "saving the day" later, so I'll prevent the chance of using the verb twice.

Good call.

Arthur doesn't bitch. Added a sentence at the end to allude to that (can tweak if needed).

True, true. I too like that second-to-last sentence. It's sudden the same way the "play through the game again" message is (and Arthur's like, "seems legit").

I would also like to say that I think Proto Man (yes, PROTO MAN) is also completed and ready for the OCRWiki.

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I would also like to say that I think Proto Man (yes, PROTO MAN) is also completed and ready for the OCRWiki.
This subject, Proto Man, was Light's first creation, and fled the lab for personal reasons despite not being fully completed.

Why is is "and" and not "but"? This sounds like fleeing is a typical thing to do for first creations. I'm also wondering if it shouldn't be "the subject" rather than "this subject". Other than that, fine by me.

When wearing a higher class of plate, however, Arthur can sometimes withstand more hits

Now it sounds as if even if you have better armor, it only helps you take more damage some of the time. Wouldn't it be more correct to say "When wearing some higher classes of plate" or similar?

Also, I added a new rule in the guidelines about posting new versions of bios in new posts, because I prefer being able to read all the versions and compare them.

Edited by Dafydd
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Now it sounds as if even if you have better armor, it only helps you take more damage some of the time. Wouldn't it be more correct to say "When wearing some higher classes of plate" or similar?

Duly noted. Alright, fixed and good to go. I'mma add it.

Also, I added a new rule in the guidelines about posting new versions of bios in new posts, because I prefer being able to read all the versions and compare them.

I inspire new rules!

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Why is is "and" and not "but"? This sounds like fleeing is a typical thing to do for first creations. I'm also wondering if it shouldn't be "the subject" rather than "this subject". Other than that, fine by me.

Makes sense to me. Go ahead, if you want you can fix those two minor things cause I don't see the point of posting the entire bio AGAIN just for those two minor changes.

If that's what it takes to get the bio uploaded, then it's fine by me.

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So: "The subject, Proto Man, was Light's first creation, but fled the lab for personal reasons despite not being fully completed." Sure, we'll go with that.

AND PROTO MAN IS NOW OFFICIALLY UPLOADED!

Thanks for not giving up on the Blues Bomber, Mirby. Now go kick back, relax, and whistle a sad theme song while your face appears in the sky.

And nice work to you too, Larry. I made a handful of adjustments to Arthur's (uploaded) bio to make it look nicer and better formatted.

We also need the thread title changed again, since Skull Kid and Proto Man are done.

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Yeah Mirby, thanks for hanging in there. And to Larry for swinging by.

Imma go PM the others.

EDIT: Done. Arrow replied saying it might be a while, but we have 4 other bios to finish in the meantime (plus Marth).

EDIT 2: The Damned might be around soonish. Still awaiting replies from Rexy and Nonamer.

EDIT 3: It's been nearly a week, and no replies so far. I'm going to be even more horribly busy this whole month, but if we still haven't heard anything from the writers of the bios currently in progress by the end of it, I'm going to pick them up and work out the last wrinkles myself. September should be pretty calm for me.

Edited by Dafydd
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  • 2 weeks later...

Bayonetta

"I've got a fever, and the only cure is more dead angels!"

ocr_mascot_074.png

Article by: Polo

Pictured from: Bayonetta

Created by: Platinum Games

First appearance: 2009

Bio

Bayonetta is an Umbra Witch, a commander of dark powers thanks to the pact she and her kind have made with demons from Inferno (hell). When battling the relentless swarms of angels from Paradiso (heaven) and other deadly opponents, the lady in black displays the full scope of her strength, agility, and combat tactics with an almost sexual lust.

Not content to wield just two guns, Bayonetta has extra firearms attached to her heels, which allows her to shoot in any direction no matter her position. Up close, the witch cuts down her enemies using various melee weapons, from swords to claws to whips, plus anything her fallen antagonists may leave behind. Sometimes, when dodging an attack at the last instant, Bayonetta can activate Witch Time, a brief period that slows everything around her to a near halt and gives her a chance to deliver swift counterattacks. In a nod to actual witch lore, Bayonetta's hair is the source of her power, and it whips out around her whenever she casts a spell to summon Inferno demons, giant fists, or boots to finish off her enemies. Simply put, this Umbra Witch is a one-woman army.

Beyond the hell she raises, Bayonetta seeks answers to her past. Having awoken from a coffin after a 500-year-long slumber, the witch finds her memories have become hazy, the reasons for being sealed away forgotten. Recurrent flashbacks haunt her as she advances across Europe, and friends, rivals, and individuals more mysterious than herself play a hand in testing and sharpening her memories and skills. A lot can happen in five centuries, and with no telling what occurred during her absence, Bayonetta progresses while keeping her wits about her and her battle capabilities at the ready.

Selected game appearances

=== PlayStation 3 ===

Bayonetta (2009)

Anarchy Reigns (2012)

=== Wii U ===

Bayonetta 2 (2014)

References

Bayonetta Wiki - "Bayonetta (character)"

Wikipedia - "Bayonetta"

Platinum Games - "Designing Bayonetta by Mari Shimazaki"

Bayonetta: The Perfect Witch Guide

Bayonetta instruction manual

Edited by Polo
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