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The worst games/movies you own


Jax Mandrake
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It's time to kick a hornet's nest, dear friends.

I did a quick search of the forums and found another topic concerning bad movies that has been dead for four years, but I wanted to bring up something similar: guilty pleasures.

Another forum I frequent has a topic that asks this same question, and I want to know: what are the worst games and movies you have in your personal library?

The first thing you may be thinking is probably "You idiot. If I don't like a game or movie, why would I keep it?" Well, I don't know about you, but I've kept a few such media items because either I like them more than I probably should or just to have them.

Permit me to share some examples from my movie collection, and maybe I'll get to the games later in the thread. In no particular alphabetical order:

Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey (Just to go with the first one)

Detroit Rock City (I love KISS and maybe one day I'll convince myself to watch this)

Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within (I like it despite its only tie to the FF game series being the name of Dr. Sid)

Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children (I have yet to watch it)

Flight of the Navigator (One of those I adored as a child but find a touch too cheeseball to watch now)

Ghostbusters 2 (I got it in a Ghostbusters two-pack)

Heartbeeps (badmovies.org gave it a skull rating but I still like it)

Memoirs of an Invisible Man (I just grew into it)

Mortal Kombat Annihilation (which has already been mentioned)

Mystery Men (my sister took me to see it in the theatre and I rather enjoyed it)

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (I can't explain why, but it got me hooked on to Aerosmith)

The Wizard (is any explanation necessary? I'll also eventually pick up the Super Mario Bros movie like the loser I am)

I also have an unhealthy number of Mystery Science Theater 3000 episodes in box sets and single discs, but can those really be considered ‘bad’ when the riffing is so damn funny?

Continuing the also, I fail to understand all the Star Wars prequel hate. Please don't try to explain it to me, as I shall fail to absorb it.

Finally, I could mention a few stand-up comedy discs I've amassed, but I tend to ignore or discard the ones I truly dislike. I do have a few that are collections of clips, most of which is complete drivel with enough diamonds in the rough to keep in my library for now. Maybe sometime I'll start a topic about that subject...

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On the game front, the last crushing disappointment I can remember is Prince of Persia 3D. Coming from the excellent Sands of Time series it was a real shock.

lol, you should imagine my disappointment when I played PoP3D after the original series

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Dragon Age 2, yet I played it all the way through and my brother did twice. We agree that we hate it, but apparently we lack a frontal lobe.

Also MW3. I'll defend the first two as the pinnacle of arcadey multiplayer FPS but 3 was a complete flop.

The last game to come out of the vault was FF13. Those were dark times.

Sold mine as "3-piece coaster set" on eBay. No joke.

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first, there was great greed, for gameboy.... sortof.

See, i bought it thinking it was totally something else, only to find out it was a final fantasy legends sortof knockoff game based loosely on some anime i never heard of. All the characters/enemies are named after food objects with the exception of the anagonist "biohaz". the story was lackluster and the gameplay was monotonous. still, it had quite some charm to it, and i like playing it once in a while, despite my utter rage the first few weeks i had it.

Final fantasy x-2 and ultima runes of virtue both make my list of games i wish i hadn't bought.

i also hate whomever made diablo 3, its not even diablo.

edit: oh man, i forgot about the newest prince of persia game! the game is beautiful, and the plot isnt horrible, but the fact that you have no hp, and literally CAN NOT DIE, takes all of the f un away. you cant have a game with no punishment for failure.

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I too know the horrors of owning FF13. I got it on Xbox, and will be glad to send it back to the hell from whence it came. Same with Ninja Gaiden 2, while I'm thinking about it.

Other games:

The original Timesplitters- Wow, this game is rough. Not as in difficult, but as in how did the sequel become so awesome based on what was in this game? It looks ugly, it plays ugly, it's just not that good.

FF8- Eh.

The award for most recent worst game: Assassin's Creed 3. Maybe it's because I can't access Live and therefore patches, but this game is crap. It is, fresh off the line, made far more difficult by what isn't finished. Not unbeatable, but frustratingly unfair.

Movies:

The Guyver 2- Yeah, it has David Hayder (solid Snake) in one of his few acting roles. It's still a pretty terrible movie. The first one is worth mentioning, but I don't own it.

Kung Pow: Enter the Fist- If I had a guilty pleasure, this is it. It is so ridiculously bad, and many of the jokes are stupid, but I keep watching it from time to time anyways.

Dark Knight Rises- Actually, no. I like this movie. I'm not joining the hipster movement that says I can't like it, even if the end twist was somewhat anti-climatic.

The Golden Compass- Someone said "You read the books right? Check out the movie, see if it's good." My response after viewing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCJGauIwzEU

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Fight Club.

That, along with the movie "Drive" is easily the worst movie I have seen in my entire life. I honestly just cannot see why all these people think it is so good.

Whaaat?! Fight Club was the best!

The worst I have are

Resident Evil Damnation

Resident Evil Degeneration(both start out good enough but become unwatchable 20 minutes into it)

A night at the roxbury (only because i keep forgetting i haven't traded it in anywhere yet)

BloodSport

Ong Bak 2 (The first one was great the rest are garbage)

and a rather long list of Hong Kong made Kung fu films that I can't get rid of and are at times very painful to watch.

The worst game I own is probably Sword of Sodan but that's only because I can't bring myself to get rid of any Genesis cartridges I have.

and I liked FFVII AC. If you saw it when it came out then those graphics were the sheez!

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Dark Knight Rises- Actually, no. I like this movie. I'm not joining the hipster movement that says I can't like it, even if the end twist was somewhat anti-climatic

I'm no hipster, but I actually did hate the Dark Knight Rises once I got over its hype and realized that the plot was just stupid. Not only that, but Tom Hardy was god awful as Bane and the character of Catwoman was totally useless to the film's story for the most part. You could have took her right out of the story and it would have made no difference.

Edited by AngelCityOutlaw
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Only Children of Mana here. It's really bad, but I just can't get rid of it...

Scott Pilgrim on the movie side.

O_o. What?

I'm no hipster, but I actually did hate the Dark Knight Rises once I got over its hype and realized that the plot was just stupid. Not only that, but Tom Hardy was god awful as Bane and the character of Catwoman was totally useless to the film's story for the most part. You could have took her right out of the story and it would have made no difference.

Agree completely. I'm still baffled by how many people claim to like the plot.

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I purchased Tank!Tank!Tank! For WiiU, and it's..... competent. But so simple and repetitive (with forcing you to redo missions to progress, to boot) that I got bored before finishing the campaign. Multiplayer is fun in that retarded way.

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Sonic heroes for the ps2 from the games side, even if im a hardcore sonic fan i REFUSE to complete this game with the shoddy level designs causing instant falling into pits constantly,

and ive got sonic 06 in my collection so yeah, sonic fffffing heroes.

As for the movie side i have Napolean Dynamite.

there is one scene i find funny in the whole film, and thats when the farmer shoots the cow infront of the school bus.

I know it has its fans but by god the humor was definately not my cup of tea.

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I'm no hipster, but I actually did hate the Dark Knight Rises once I got over its hype and realized that the plot was just stupid. Not only that, but Tom Hardy was god awful as Bane and the character of Catwoman was totally useless to the film's story for the most part. You could have took her right out of the story and it would have made no difference.

Dark knight rises suffers the same problem all 3rd films in a superhero franchise suffer from.

Trying to tell a long and complicated story in under 3 hours without people losing track of whats going on.

spiderman 3 with the alien symbiote/venom saga and xmen 3 with the phoenix saga respectfully.

They should have made blake the new batman when bruce got his back broken, unlike in comics spines dont heal up if you just click em back in place.

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A friend and I used to have bad movie nights in our early 20s. Order a pizza, have a few drinks and we'd see if we could make it through the whole thing. Saw many horrible pieces of cinema that way. Troll 2, Krull, Ernest movies, The Stuff, Gargoyles (1972), and Uwe Boll movies to name a few.

As for things I actually own that are guilty pleasures:

Pootie Tang from 2001. It's freaking written and directed by Louis CK! I fact that the lead character speaks in some pseudo-jive language is just awesome. Decent cast too with Chris Rock, Wanda Sykes and Jennifer Coolidge. Sa Da Tay!

I'm a rhythm game fan and DJ Hero was awesome, yet really stupid at the same time. For old school games, Bible Adventures, but only for Noah's Ark. Though it is fun to throw baby Moses in the Nile for the hell of it once in awhile.

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I was an admin for the KidsWB AOL chatroom back in 1997. It was volunteer, so I wasn't expecting anything. As thank you at Christmastime, the head admin for the chat sent us some Wal-Mart bargain-bin "christmas classics" CD, along with a VHS for the movie Batman and Robin. Y'know, this steaming heap of crap. As far as I know both are still at my parents' house somewhere.

Speaking of parents, they bought me the shittiest shovelware when I was a kid, because I wasn't allowed to make my own video game purchases. We got games at Christmastime and any suggestions went out the window because my dad would just go buy whatever cheap crap he could find. That's why I have Bart Vs. The Space Mutants, Taz: Escape from Mars and Beavis and Butthead. At least Ecco 2 and Aladdin were pretty cool games, but since they bought me a Genesis instead of a SNES thinking it was a superior system, the cool games available in my area were pretty limited back in 1993. You never saw cool shit like Gunstar Heroes, Sword of Vermillion or the Phantasy Star games. Buffalo was kind of a black hole for cool things in the '90s.

Right now we have a terrible movie called "Cactus Jack" that we got just because it looked like a terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger cowboy movie. It does not fail to deliver, and even includes gags found in Chuck Jones cartoons. I'm sure you can find it somewhere out there if you look hard enough, and kudos if you can actually get through the whole movie. I can't.

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