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OCR02955 - *YES* Deus Ex 'Sadevakio' *RESUB*


Liontamer
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Original Decision

Your ReMixer name: Eino Keskitalo

Your real name: Eino Keskitalo

Your website: https://sites.google.com/site/evktalo/

Your userid: 20708

Name of game(s) arranged: Deus Ex (PC/Windows)

Name of arrangement: Sadevakio

Name of individual song(s) arranged: UNATCO

(http://vgmdb.net/album/910)

Link to the original soundtrack:

FLAC: https://www.dropbox.com/s/5casso3w9wd00oh/eino_keskitalo-sadevakio-resub.flac

Renoise project file: https://www.dropbox.com/s/dk6cgelngwv9y6v/eino_keskitalo_-_sadevakio.xrns

Previous decision thread here: http://ocremix.org/forums/showthread.php?t=42906

Hi! Here's a resubmission of my UNATCO theme rearrangement.

Previous submission letter stuff (thanks etc) still applies :)

Many thanks for the excellent (& diverse!) feedback in the judging thread. I've addressed most of the issues one way or the other. Specifically:

- Toned down reverbs

- Cleared bass frequencies, especially in the outro

- Adjusted writing in 01:12-01:30 part

- Retoned lead & support instrument frequencies in places to reduce frequency clash

- Much adjustment of levels

- Varied up the cymbal sound

- Changed some drum patterns for less busy bass drum, more busy toms

- Adressed Vig's criticism about the flow of the piece by extending the middle part (with a four-to-the-floor bass drum, no less)

Also:

- More use of panning/width in End, also fade out some other tracks apart from the drums (as per Magellanic's suggestion from the workshop last time around)

- Corrected the bell melody (kept the mistake-as-variation in places)

Things I didn't do:

- Change the sounds themselves (apart from layering the cymbal)

- Get rid of the tempo changes

Source usage of the middle part: the background melody (

) plays throughout. The main riff plays 2:39-2:57, varied up. The bell melody playing 2:58-3:42 is based on the figure at
in the source.

cheers,

--Eino

-------------------------------------------

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There's a pop right at the very beginning of the track that needs to be fixed.

I liked this piece before, but the way different parts were mixed too evenly in the previous version caused this to lack direction and flow. By making some of the supporting writing stay more in the background where it belonged, the progression of the song made more sense. I say this in a good way, but these revisions almost make me forget anything was ever wrong with the previous version.

I thought at times the bassline could have been a bit louder and more prominent, but it's a very delicate thing, and I could easily picture how adjusting the bass could make it overpowering.

The dynamic curve was relatively subtle until the slowdown transition at 3:41, so I could see some judges or listeners thinking it was a little flat or overlong until then; that said, I liked the subtle changes in energy and instrumentation for the first two-thirds and didn't feel anything was a dealbreaker there.

The final section felt a bit barren, the synths were a bit plain, and the pad-style sounds seemed to muddy the soundscape a bit, but again, it wasn't a big deal and nothing was remotely in danger of being a problem with regards to the standards. Things gradually built up for a solid close. It's a low-key take, but a stylish and personalized take, on an already low-key original. Nice work, Eino. :-)

YES

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Yeah, I'm definitely digging this take on UNATCO.

I was a bit meh on the intro build. The beat work felt a bit plodding and unsupportive of the track until the change around :45. Once it kicks in, though, it's grooving together much more nicely. Nice interplay on the lead synths between the source lead and counterpoint.

Very cool modulations on the bassline underneath everything. Reverb was a bit on the heavy side overall, but totally understandable given the 80's synthpop feel here.

Reviewing my previous vote on this, you've done fantastic work addressing the issues brought up last time. :nicework:

YES

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Agreeing with Justin that the intro felt pretty weak to me, and didn't build any excitement. It established the soundscape pretty well, but didn't build anticipation for a breakout main section at all.

The sounds are mostly fine, though there isn't much weight to the kick; it feels really tiny to me, and isn't driving the song very well. The synths chosen are nice, but the parts are so incredibly stiff and robotic it's very hard for me to get into any sort of groove due to the completely level subdivision. Nothing feels accented or emphasized, and as such, it's exhausting trying to give the same level of attention to every note.

I think the content of the mix is fine, and the length is about right. It's a personalized take on the source, but it is so robotic I can't pass it. Please adjust the velocities so that it has some breathing qualities to it.

No, please resubmit

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the parts are so incredibly stiff and robotic it's very hard for me to get into any sort of groove due to the completely level subdivision. Nothing feels accented or emphasized, and as such, it's exhausting trying to give the same level of attention to every note.

I didn't hear the same intensity/levels for every note, so I'm not sure what you mean there.

It's awesome dance music. Do the robot. (No, really, play the song to this...)

beyonce2.gif

Seriously though, I get the point of the rigid sequencing potentially being taxing, at least for the slower parts (3:53-end), but it ultimately didn't bother me and sounded pretty stylistic, as opposed to failing at humanizing the sound or sounding too dynamically flat. The upbeat stuff especially was nice and stylish. Like Beyonce. :-)

Edited by Liontamer
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After the 1-minute mark the arrangement gets extremely noodly. There's just a ton of random melodic ideas stepping on each other and not developing at all, while the rhythm section does little or nothing in terms of variation to keep the listener interested. This section is really just a waste of time.

The mix is really quite mono for the most part. The pads have some stereo space to them, but the leads really don't, and for a track like this you really want to have a lush and evolving soundscape.

On the whole this was a pretty easy call. Way too much noodling, not nearly enough direction and development.

NO

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  • 1 month later...

I can see the all the above mentioned crits, but I think this has a lot of fun energy and is a unique take on UNACTO. I'd say the positives make up for the crits, though I'd definitely suggest Eino apply the crits to his future works, because they are all valid. This one is a pass for me, though it's a bit close.

YES

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  • 2 weeks later...

I agree the mix gets a bit noodly, but it never loses focus of the source imo. I think it is pretty creative. I like the sound choices. I do agree that the writing sounds stiff and robotic through most of it, but I'm not having a huge problem with it. I'd like it if the sounds were separated a bit more with eq, stereo separation and reverb techniques, but it's getting the job done. The soundscape sounds a bit flat, it could use a few surprises. Something to work on for next time.

I like the 3/4 intro but I'm not a huge fan of the transition at 0:40, I wish that transition had built energy instead of letting it drop. The transition back to 3/4 at 3:42 works a bit better, but could still use an effect like a downward sweep or something to glue the sections together a bit better.

This isn't going to be my strongest YES ever, but I do like this track and I think the production is over the bar. Nice work Eino!

YES

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This does a whole lot on a micro level. I hear these little change-ups here and there that give this a restless energy. That's important because the song doesn't have a particularly strong direction. The little detail work makes up for the lack of strong melodic focus - it almost comes across as a cinematic electronic song in that respect. Ultimately, I enjoyed it.

The production isn't as smooth as I would like, pretty focused on the mids and a little grating. This bothered me more than any stiffness in the sequencing, which I heard but thought was intentional (and not an issue). Still, it's passable. With a solid arrangement and production, I see no reason not to pass. It could be a lot stronger, but what's here is still worth hearing.

YES

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