DemanusFlint Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 Well, I've sort of been messing around with this for a while and I want to know if it's worth putting any more time into. It's not really the kind of music I've heard on OCR much, influenced by lo-fi organic drone artists like Fursaxa or Avarus, with sort of some Yuka & Yoshimi thrown in for good measure. I feel like I could still add some instruments in there, but what do you guys think? http://www.duke.edu/~jfw7/DemanusFlint-_Escalloniaceae_(version)+.mp3 (sorry about the silence at the end, I messed up rendering the file) Edit: The song, of course, is the title screen theme from Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island (http://ocremix.dreamhosters.com/songs/original/Yoshi's%20Island.rsn) UPDATE: http://www.ocremix.org/forums/showthread.php?p=305778#post305778 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skrypnyk Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 Drone? I'm having a hard time deciding whether this is good, or if this is bad. The minute of silence at the end doesn't help my decision either. I request a track from one of your influences so I have something to compare this to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemanusFlint Posted August 8, 2007 Author Share Posted August 8, 2007 Well, pretend that the silence at the end is just the silence that would naturally occur after a song finishes. Here's thirty seconds each of (in order) Avarus, Fursaxa, Yuka & Yoshimi, and Daniel Higgs. And I guess that the piece is not really droney yet... should it be? I can always head downstairs and record my Hammond on top of things, which I had sort of meant to do anyway. Dunno! EDIT: I had a sample MP3 up, but took it down due to server space issues... let me know if you're interested in hearing it and I'll help you out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Tentacle Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 This is fascinatingly ambient. It doesn't actually go anywhere, but until that one sustained note at the end, it seemed to be nice and exotic. It had a very interesting feel, and I think it could become an OCRemix with some more obvious melody. I intend to look into the aforementioned "drone" artists, because it sounds like the new agey ethereal music to which I like to fall asleep. In my humble opinion, which as an aspiring remixer is all I have, I would enjoy hearing this expanded upon. Oh, and everything seemed very clean, which I know is a big plus with the Judges panel. Good luck!! I hope inspiration continues to aid you!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skrypnyk Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 ok... wow... and I thought I had an odd taste in music. I really don't know what to make of this. I would say something like 'it sounds really cluttered, it's hard to make out what's going on.', and yet, that might be the point. I would (personally speaking), tone down all the drone(ness) and bring out the melody, while still keeping a sense of avant-garde, experimental/subliminal noise. Then there's always waiting on what someone else has to say.... Way to be different! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemanusFlint Posted August 8, 2007 Author Share Posted August 8, 2007 Yeah, I think cluttered is the point. I feel that bringing the melody out is going to be problematic, too... in terms of arrangement there's honestly not a whole lot going on. And it's okay if my music taste is odder than yours... IDM is still pretty neat, anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemanusFlint Posted August 9, 2007 Author Share Posted August 9, 2007 waiting on what someone else has to say.... Any more comments would be greatly appreciated! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmr Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 Without having heard any other examples of songs in the genre, I feel I can safely say that this sounds like an "lo-fi organic drone". I'd like to echo what The Green Tentacle said; if it had some more obvious melody (and perhaps some re-arrangement of said melody), I can see this passing. Don't really think you need any more, uh, drone. What you've got is quite enough for my taste, thank you very much . I think I might check out some of the other artists you've mentioned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moseph Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 I like this a lot. The drone's fine. I think the mix is a bit bass-heavy, though -- maybe EQ the low-end down a little. As far as melodic development goes, it might be interesting to gradually mutate that repeating background line (the first thing that comes in) -- add a new note every so often, change an existing note every so often, etc. You could also maybe have another instrument that plays the melody at a different tempo and/or in a different range. Or play the melody backwards at some point, perhaps? Personally, I'm not bothered by the lack of melodic material, but the judges may or may not have different opinions. I'd say even if you can't come up with anything more for the melody, go ahead and submit. If they accept it, cool. If they don't, then you can try to come up with something more. I would love (love, I say) to see something like this get on OCR. Let's expose people to something other than rock/techno/dance! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tyrog Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 Surely original Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeybrain Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 dude don't listen to anyone this is awesome the way it is. if you create a song that comes completely from within your mind, why cripple it with other people's opinions? this is the kind of song i've been waiting for, so please don't change it! or at least let me keep this version of the song. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Tentacle Posted August 11, 2007 Share Posted August 11, 2007 I agree with Moseph. Trying to pull out the melody bit by bit seems like it may suit this genre. I can say I just wanted heavier drums and a solid melody to burst forth, but that's me. However, the little bit of insight I've gathered from the few brief conversations I've had with several judges and from reading a lot of the judges decisions points me to believe that a recognizable iteration of the source tune in some interpretive manner will go far in getting this tune accepted. hehe, unfortunately this leads to a fear of submitting my own work because I'm not sure I meet their criteria As such, what do i know, right? I also agree with Moseph in that I like this a lot. I look forward to downloading it to my OCR collection when it's all done! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemanusFlint Posted August 11, 2007 Author Share Posted August 11, 2007 Thanks, everyone! I've really enjoyed all of the compliments-- I'm a huge fan of the work that all of the other ReMixers have been doing over the years, but I do feel that there's plenty of musical territory left to explore. The idea with modulating the mbira's melody is a good one, but unfortunately it was recorded live (as is nearly every other sound) and I'm not planning on redoing any tracks (assuming nothing's extremely problematic). I did, however, realize that I could record some glockenspiel or melodica on top of things while maintaining the general flow of the piece, and maybe even some light piano work, so maybe I can get some actual harmonies going on. I'll upload separate versions and link to them in the original post, and hopefully I get something we're all happy with. Thanks again! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monobrow Posted August 11, 2007 Share Posted August 11, 2007 What this needs is some lo-fi john lennon chanting "ohm ohm free your mind free your mind oh oh yoko oh yoko oh oh" (maybe you should put a distorted voice in there chanting the melody a little or something) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemanusFlint Posted August 11, 2007 Author Share Posted August 11, 2007 New mix... I've added some glock, some melodica, some guitar, and I think the general mix is a little bit better. The effect of all this, though, is that the melody is even more buried through the piece. What do you think, should I add another solo melodic line? I'm also pretty sure that it'll need to be longer, so I'll work on that too. Edit: Eek! I re-uploaded... if the version you listened to cut off suddenly, things should be fixed now. Edit: Links removed, let me know if you want them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemanusFlint Posted August 16, 2007 Author Share Posted August 16, 2007 Just an update, guys... I've been extending the piece with an intro more in line with the stuttering that opens up the actual song and trying to make everything sound perfect, and then I'm planning on submitting. I'll post it here as well, of course, but I'm not sure if I can wait around for many more comments. Thanks for everything you've said so far! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrototypeRaptor Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 wow...this is amazing. never heard anything quite like it - probably a plus with the judges. I'd prefer a clearer melody at some points, just kinda fading in and fading out just like the synths, and some more solid drums, but, hey, that's just me. If this is what the style of music calls for, go for it! The worst the judges can say is no, right? Overall, very nice. Hope this makes it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theory of N Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 Don't know if you've subbed yet, but that really long drone at the end is a bit loud and sort of annoying. It doesn't really blend in with the rest of the droney feel you've got. Also, I don't hear much difference from the earlier version. I really hope this does get accepted. It's probably too liberal for the judges though. I know Skrypnyk has made some songs with more melody than this has and his were rejected for being too liberal. Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skrypnyk Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 why don't you just tell EVERYBODY That ToN??!!?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tyrog Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 Good work, dude! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemanusFlint Posted August 17, 2007 Author Share Posted August 17, 2007 http://www.duke.edu/~jfw7/DemanusFlint-_Escalloniaceae_(version)+.mp3 Submission! This is the final version of the song, and I'm finally going to see how the judges like it (in x weeks). This is a more substantial rehaul than the difference between the last two, so hopefully it addresses some of the issues raised. A long distorted outro has been added, and while I guess I could possibly end up hating it in the long run, I really think this is how I definitely want the piece to sound. Thanks for everything, everyone! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radiowar Posted November 10, 2007 Share Posted November 10, 2007 Too bad about it being rejected, I really like this. I'm not really a fan of the crowd noises though, I think it clashes with the mood established by everything else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemanusFlint Posted November 12, 2007 Author Share Posted November 12, 2007 http://www.ocremix.org/forums/showthread.php?t=11421 Wow, I thought I would have to be the one to commit the thread necromancy. So thanks, Radiowar, and congratulations on the recent ReMix! But yeah, I'm sorry this didn't get accepted too. I definitely can see where some of the criticism is coming from-- I've been asked before what's going on in some of my songs beneath all the layers, and the answer isn't always enough. The bass/percussion could probably be changed up a bit as well, although they're still far from direct sampling (especially the drums). I also suppose that the "crowd noise" (although it pains me to simplify them so) could be less constant and, therefore, more effective. I do wish that the ending had gone over better, though. Although it's harsh and distorted, it's also one of the song's sparser moments, and the flute lines are the most exposed there, and some of the percussive clanging going on through there is really great. I'm also not positive about how I would go about with arrangement-- the mbira and zither are pretty much set, as far as I'm concerned, and I'm really not sure how new/arranged material would fit in beside them. I think the framework I've built is already pretty much full (overflowing, perhaps?) at this point. So what does everyone think? Do I try resubmitting this, or have I painted myself into a non-OCR corner, too limited by my (developing) personal aesthetic? Let me know what you think, please! Oh, and if any judges happen through here, I'd love to start a dialogue! --Jonathan oh and ps.. This is an interesting take on the original (and would work well in an anime imo). wat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theory of N Posted November 12, 2007 Share Posted November 12, 2007 I personally think you should resub. Before you do that though, you have a lot of restructuring to do. For one thing, re-interpret the melody a bit. Like some of the judges said, the melody in there is pretty much verbatim. I don't think this is really too liberal as much as it's not liberal enough. The original melody is in there fine, it's just too much like the original. Also, make it a bit more prominent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radiowar Posted November 12, 2007 Share Posted November 12, 2007 So what does everyone think? Do I try resubmitting this, or have I painted myself into a non-OCR corner, too limited by my (developing) personal aesthetic? I wouldn't say it's a "non-OCR corner". It isn't a perfect comparison, but Children of the Monkey Machine has a similar style and he's one of the most posted remixers on the site. I think the mbira would be the easiest thing to vary, like maybe incorporate some tape effects as everything else gets more intense or something, i dunno Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.