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Zero Punctuation (Hilarious) Game Reviews


sephfire
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I haven't played Pokemon since Gold/Silver... kind of caught on to the same-ness of every release and I always had trouble navigating the "what is everyone weak to" chart that I printed out and set on my lap. I was done when they started giving Pokemon TWO types and I couldn't do the math to figure out what they were weak to.

Most of the type weaknesses make sense (water beats fire, duh), and the ones that don't can generally still be explained away (bug types are weak to poison because of insecticides, water is strong against rock because of water erosion, etc.). I have played like every single pokemon game since I was 10 years old, and I never needed to use a printed chart to figure out the weaknesses.

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Most of the type weaknesses make sense (water beats fire, duh), and the ones that don't can generally still be explained away (bug types are weak to poison because of insecticides, water is strong against rock because of water erosion, etc.). I have played like every single pokemon game since I was 10 years old, and I never needed to use a printed chart to figure out the weaknesses.

My brother says the same exact thing. But why is ice strong vs. ground? Why is flying strong vs. fight? Rock strong vs. bug? About half of them make perfect sense and the others are whatever they are for the sake of balance.

I once took this class called anatomy. All we did was memorize stuff, hundreds of stuffs. I got a D- while my friend, Talya, studied 5 minutes before each test and got an A. She happens to be a Pokemon fanatic

I guess Modus is dumber than a 10 year old? :<

I once took this class called Media Writing in college. It was understood that no one was supposed to get an A and no one did but three people.

I'm sure you can guess where I'm going with this.

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My brother says the same exact thing. But why is ice strong vs. ground? Why is flying strong vs. fight? Rock strong vs. bug? About half of them make perfect sense and the others are whatever they are for the sake of balance.

Have you ever tried to punch a bird?

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Have you ever tried to punch a bird?

No.

Well, twice.

EDIT: I feel like I'm being too anti-Pokemon. I'll try to even it out by saying I loved Pokemon Stadium. Not sure about its sequels but Stadium, especially dem minigames... oh yeah! And the trading card game game. You know, the game about the card game. It was really hard, but at least I didn't have to buy the cardboard version.

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There's probably some kind of obscure Japanese story about a fighter being killed by a hawk or something that would explain the Flying versus Fighting thing.

And I have dropped a rock on a bug, it was a rather large rock on a freaking huge beetle, the guts went everywhere. On my shoes, my pants, on the cat, everywhere.

Never ever squish large insects; they are natures water balloons... but instead of water, it's gross stuff. Just leave them alone.

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have you ever seen a rock fall on a bug

One time I tried to kill a yellow jacket by repeatedly throwing a rock onto it as a kid.

The fucker was stronger than I gave it credit for; the motherfucker would not die despite the amount of rocks dropped on it.

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Damn, I turn my back on this thread for one second and we're all of a sudden applying typing to real life scenarios. If someone really wants to explain some weaknesses, explain the dark vs psychic vs fighting vs ghost relationships. Psychic killing fighting makes sense, but the others? You cannot rationalize this one (but I want to see someone try) :-D

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Damn, I turn my back on this thread for one second and we're all of a sudden applying typing to real life scenarios. If someone really wants to explain some weaknesses, explain the dark vs psychic vs fighting vs ghost relationships. Psychic killing fighting makes sense, but the others? You cannot rationalize this one (but I want to see someone try) :-D

I got this.

Psychic is weak to Dark and Ghost (and Bug for that matter) because all three are common fears people have. It's hard to concentrate when you're afraid of something, right?

Fighting beats Dark because Fighting types are supposed to be heroic, straight up fighters, while Dark types are underhanded and fight with cheap tactics. Who always wins in stories? The hero.

Dark beats Ghost because, well...have you ever tried to scare the darkness?

Next!

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