ReMix:Valkyrie Profile "The Shining Blue Armor Descends" 5:24

You wanted it... you needed it... you ceaslessly demanded it... and now OC ReMix has got it: Our very first Viking Metal ReMix. Not to be confused with technoviking. I suppose it was only a matter of time before the Norse gods descended upon the judges panel and waged heavy metal mayhem; in this instance CHIPP Damage and Fray are the engines of their fury. Jahan Zoltan Honma, whose name is ridiculously fun to pronounce, writes:

"I hope you're ready for a resubmission of my remix of the most important song from the best Norse Mythology -based RPG (Irrational Behavior from Valkyrie Profile), done in the only Norse Mythology-based modern genre of music (Viking Metal), produced by a guy whose name is pronounced just like that of a Norse God (Fray), and arranged by a guy whose got nothing Norwegian to his name except for perhaps some viking-esque snowflakes in his beard (Me). This plate of sweets has all the death-voiced gingerbread men, Weeping Lily pollen-filled brownies, and RAGNAROKY ROAD ice cream that the previous one had, except this time it's produced twice as well. Fray got a new oven and has been cooking this thing for. . . like ever! And I REALLY appreciate him for it. He tried his best to selflessly satisfy the helpful comments of the judges (Thanks for those, by the way) while simultaneously giving me the viking-esque sound that I was longing for. We're both really happy with the results and we hope you are too."

There seem to be a lot of angry, dark, metal vocal mixes lately - first 'Asphyxiated Soul' and now this. Whereas Kadmium's DooM mix was over-the-top disturbing and evil, this mix is just... over the top; if you're not a fan of shouted, semi-intelligible man-vocals, you might not be down. If you are, then step right up! Original lyrics name-drop a metric ton of Norse mythology, with familiar video game icons like Yggdrasil, Bahamut, and Ragnarok all making an appearance. Put simply, this mix will put hair on your chest and may in fact trigger reverse evolution from homo-sapiens back to Australopithecus... or further. It is not subtle; one might go so far as to say it is an outright rejection of all things subtle, nuanced, or restrained in any way. CHIPP is NOT using his indoor voice, here. He's very enthusiastically growling about Norse things, and if that's specifically what you've been missing in your life (and really, how could it not be?), your ship has come in. Judges had a rough time evaluating this since Viking Metal has its own... unique... style. Guitar is great, though, and there's a ton of variety, with the arrangement basically just spazzing out in a frenetic, apoplectic conniption fit of sound. If Odin went off his meds and had a temper tantrum, deciding to shout about, you know, "life"... it might sound something like this. Jahan wrote a whole story for this, and I think the world will be a richer place if I repeat it verbatim:

"I am Zoltan, the legendary travelling warrior who united all the countries of the Yamato Continent.  Ragnarok begins and I prepare for the war with all of my friends in Hai-lan.  We start fighting and I die when an arrow hits my shield and releases a cloud of weeping lilly pollen (poisonous).  No Valkyrie comes for me but the Rainbow Bridge to Valhalla appears before me.  I journey across the bridge.  After arriving, I walk through the hall and find nobody except for a single norn, Skuld.  I ask where all of the Einherjar are.  Skuld tells me that Ragnarok is a war not only for humans, but that gods and even the dead must fight(In other words, the Valkyries are busy too).  He tells me that there are legends of my bravery on Midgard that have been spoken among the Einherjar and that Odin, upon hearing these tales, had decided that I would be chosen to change the outcome of Ragnarok.  So Odin told two of his best Einherjar to leave great weapons for me.  Those warriors are Arngrim and Lucian.  From Arngrim: The Bahamut's Tear. And from Lucian: The Shining Bolt. And from Skuld I receive a swan maiden's feathered cloak.  He tells me to use this to go to other worlds of the Yggdrasil to help battle.  So I take them and am granted life once more and am falling from the sky. I use Bahamut's Tear and Shining Bolt to defeat all enemies in Yamato. After the battle in Yamato, my friends and I jump into our dragon ships with our entire armies and head to Asgard to defeat Surtur.  We make the journey to Jotunheim by wishing upon the swan maiden's feathered cloak.  At Jotunheim we help win the battle and the outcome of Ragnarok is turned in Odin's favor.  In the end I end up killing Surtur and that means he can't burn the world with his fiery hands like in real Norse Mythology, but I get engulfed in flames and die shortly after and this time get carried off to Valahalla by a valkyrie to enjoy the feast of the Einherjar after the victory of Ragnarok."

Damn right...testify. This mix takes its conceptual origins and embraces them full on. While most of us probably don't wake up in the morning and say "Damn, I could really go for some Viking Metal!," one can still appreciate the enthusiasm, energy, and yes, the craft that goes into this sort of opus. Fray's done a good job with production, too, and I even feel like the distortion & occasional vocal clipping the judges had beef with makes sense, given the context. Jahan specifically requested we include his following special thanks to:

"Moseph, Yoozer, Dannthr, Sengin, zircon, Harmony, JJT, big giant circles, Darkesword, OA, Snappleman, Trenthian, SwordBreaker, Legion303, Sixto, anyone else I may have missed, Fray for becoming my beloved collaboration partner and kicking some production ass, Hoboka and djpretzel for random props in my forum thread, and Tensei-san for listening to this remix about 100 times after every miniscule change to the audio that was made. "You are my embassador of coin."

An epic special thanks list for an epic mix; this definitely won't be for everyone, but if you can let yourself go, it's really rather special. You can tell CHIPP's poured his heart into it, and possibly several other body parts as well, and the result is something singular, forceful, and extremely beefy.