1. work-in-progress Celeste - "Just Breathe" feat. ElusiveBac0n - ReMix of "First Steps" by Lena Raine

[Pipko]

Latest WIP: (updated 3/20)
 

Original source:

I'm really excited about this track and hoping to get it to a point where it can be submitted for OCR. I feel like I'm most of the way there but it still needs a little work and I'd love your feedback!

My main concerns at this point are:

• The arrangement may be too conservative/similar to the original track?
• I'm not totally sold on the sound of the synth playing the triplet figure at 1:15, 2:19, and 3:23. I've replaced that instrument several times and have yet to settle on something appropriate. Any suggestions?

I arranged and recorded or programmed everything except the voice of Madeline, who is performed by the wonderful ElusiveBac0n.

I'd love your feedback on anything at all that you think isn't quite working or up to OCR's standards. From the arrangement to the performance to mixing and mastering, anything at all you hear that's not there yet. I think it might be like 80% there but if not I'm willing to make big changes if necessary.

Thank you for your time!

Edited 16 hours ago by Pipko
updated WIP

[Pipko]

Updated the WIP. I cleaned up the vocal so it's more understandable and made some other minor adjustments. But I think I still need to make bigger changes to the arrangement. It will be easier to talk about if I show my arrangement view:

EDIT: Updated again (3/20):




I still have several concerns. I need to do more to mix up the arrangement and instrumentation. The 12.5% pulse playing the ascending figure through most of the song gets tiring, and while that figure is important, it could probably be passed between several different instruments instead. Especially if those instruments are NOT pianos or synths!!! The clav/sine duo playing the triplet figure in sections B1, B2, B3 is better than what I had before but I'm still not completely sold on it.

Any other problems you all notice, or suggestions you might have? Thanks for your time.

Edited 15 hours ago by Pipko