Metroid 2 - My World

[cooliscoolio]

Submitted for OC approval.

 

https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-johnson-850853006/metroid-my-world-main-corridor-oc-remix-candidate-final-mix

 

 

Its a divergence from the source, i reimagined it quite substantially. 

Edited November 25, 2023 by cooliscoolio

[Hemophiliac]

Can you please post the source?

[cooliscoolio]

Edited OP.

[Hemophiliac]

With regards to source usage, i'm barely picking up on the original in here.  I suppose the piano melody is inspired by the source melody, but it's barely recognizable as such.  I'd suggest to make the source more dominant and recognizable especially if you're considering submitting to OCR.

If you haven't done so already, check out https://ocremix.org/info/Submission_Standards_and_Instructions

Under 4 it says:

Quote

3. The source material must be identifiable and dominant.

• While interpretation and original additions are encouraged, arrangement must not modify the source material beyond recognition.
• The amount of arranged source material must be substantial enough to be recognized.

As far as production goes, there are a few things I noticed that should be addressed.  The hats are cymbals are mixed louder than the rest of the drum kit, and the snare and the kick are more buried.  The bass is also very quiet and should be brought up.  If you haven't done so, a compressor could do wonders to make the bass come through.

The piano and drums could use humanization to make them feel more realistic.  Vary the velocities of the notes so they aren't as close to the same as the ones immediately before and after them.  Also nudge their start times forward and back just slightly off the gridlines (humans aren't perfect on every note!)

The other issue I have is a compositional one.  This is a long track that doesn't really go anywhere.  You could cut 3-4 minutes off of the track and still have the same feeling achieved as it is now.  The drum pattern hardly changes up, and there's no drum fills to keep interest or move the flow along.  You do a good job of changing where the lead focus should be (going from piano to synth), but that still took a long while to get to that (almost 2:30 before it happens).  If you want to keep the length of the track I suggest adding a contrasting section where the drums drop out or change their pattern to be more minimal.  Instead of dropping things out for a section you could instead go for a higher energy section.  Either way, it's up to you.  The track just needs some contrast to keep the listener interested in what's happening with a long piece of music.

Good job adding the vibrato on the synth later in the track, that's a nice human touch that does feel good.

Overall there's work to be done before you send it in to OCR.  Please consider what I've said before you do choose to submit.

[cooliscoolio]

Thanks for the tips. I will work on it. Interesting about the bass, I thought it a bit too loud actually. My equipment isn't neutral, obviously. Regarding it going nowhere, indeed the original is something of a run-on tune, and that was the idea. The piano c4-c5 line represents the original melody, but not the original rhythm. Not sure if you caught that. Also, at 5:06, the bassline expands and the cymbals and hat patterns change, representing something of a finale.

 

Again, thanks. I.will work hard to put your advice into music.

 

Edited November 27, 2023 by cooliscoolio

[Hemophiliac]

I did notice the very subtle changes, but that's what they are subtle. Over a long period of time, subtlety can be good when there are other big changes and variation to accompany the subtlety too.

Think about it this way.  If it sounds subtle to you it's probably not noticed by the listener, and probably need to exaggerate some.  Be intentional with your decisions.

Good luck.

[cooliscoolio]

Thanks! Your time and ear is much valued; I will heed your suggestions with great care. Salut.

Edited November 29, 2023 by cooliscoolio