Mwahahahaha! I have some really fat sawtooths bro, but if its Sytrus you want, you really need to try out the JP8000. I usually just make my own synth presets (3xosc FTW!), but when I was beginning out a few years ago, this preset was the sickest out their. The link for that is below:
http://warning11.googlepages.com/JP8000.fst
(But seriously, play with some knobs and make your own man!)
Now for some critique, your song is alright, but you do really need to vary it off subject a little bit more, really close to the original, and if I was to be really mean, Id say cough cough *MIDI* cough cough.... But thats if I was mean.. What im missing a is a big climax to your song, the snare gets really annoying (so do the overall drum layouts), and like Leah said: " This is really close to the original, drums aside. The other posters gave you some good technical advice, but if you are trying to make something that would pass OCR standards, you're going to have to be much more imaginative with your interpretation. But hey, kudos for transcribing the song so closely just by ear, that's not easy!"
When your next interpretation is out, Ill be here
peace