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So I wrote this when I was about 14 or 15 years old. It's just a short jam but I recently decided to record it for the hell of it. I believe it was influenced by the F-Zero GX soundtrack at the time. The game had this awesome drop tuned metal/electronic soundtrack. So I guess that's what I was going for.

Pick your poison:

Youtube! - You can leave angry comments and see a picture!

Soundcloud - Better sound quality and you can see a pretty waveform!

I'm aware the tone sucks but it's all I got.

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So I wrote this when I was about 14 or 15 years old. It's just a short jam but I recently decided to record it for the hell of it. I believe it was influenced by the F-Zero GX soundtrack at the time. The game had this awesome drop tuned metal/electronic soundtrack. So I guess that's what I was going for.

Pick your poison:

Youtube! - You can leave angry comments and see a picture!

Soundcloud - Better sound quality and you can see a pretty waveform!

I'm aware the tone sucks but it's all I got.

This is sweet, but i cant hear the last 20 seconds from my laptop, tone sound fine on my laptops speaker tho.

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I'm using really crappy headphones at the moment, but at least with these the guitar tone sounds really tame and weak. Also I think there's just one guitar track in there and it's in dead center. I would utilize at least two separate guitars on L and R, plus give it more volume since in rock and metal music, they should play the lead role and not just buzz on the background.

Also, this is not heavy metal, it's some techno/electronica (I don't know the genres) that has a guitar in there. Just wanted to point that out.

Bass sound is bad, as is overall mixing (tracker-quality), but the "jam" still isn't all that bad in itself. I wouldn't listen to it like I listen to other music (meaning, concentrating solely on the music) but it could work as a background track for a 90's freeware space shooter game such as Wings, so it has its place. I've heard a lot worse stuff than this that was made by 15 year olds (including my own), so that means there is perhaps potential if you just practice.

Keep developing your skills and, if you're utilizing guitars, give them more room in the future.

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I'm using really crappy headphones at the moment, but at least with these the guitar tone sounds really tame and weak. Also I think there's just one guitar track in there and it's in dead center. I would utilize at least two separate guitars on L and R, plus give it more volume since in rock and metal music, they should play the lead role and not just buzz on the background.

Also, this is not heavy metal, it's some techno/electronica (I don't know the genres) that has a guitar in there. Just wanted to point that out.

Bass sound is bad, as is overall mixing (tracker-quality), but the "jam" still isn't all that bad in itself. I wouldn't listen to it like I listen to other music (meaning, concentrating solely on the music) but it could work as a background track for a 90's freeware space shooter game such as Wings, so it has its place. I've heard a lot worse stuff than this that was made by 15 year olds (including my own), so that means there is perhaps potential if you just practice.

Keep developing your skills and, if you're utilizing guitars, give them more room in the future.

If you're using really crappy headphones why listen with those to give someone a critique? Because it definitely is the headphones that must be killing a lot of it for you. I say this because the guitars are in fact, panned and you're perceiving it as being in the dead center. Which totally kills the punch. Also, the soundcloud link has better quality I notice and toss those headphones stat.

I do practice, I have been every single day for the past six years lol. This was written a about 5 years ago as I pointed out. I just thought it was a cool riff.

After all this it's when you say "this isn't heavy metal" I'm pretty convinced you hardly read my original post. I said I remember being influenced by the F-Zero GX soundtrack, which was electronic combined with metal riffs. Yes, I realize now I should have called the thread electronic/metal or something. Even still......

I appreciate you listening and if you didn't like it, you're totally entitled to. I just find it hard to take your critique seriously when you admit to listening with bad quality headphones and seem to miss some details I pointed out about the song from the first post on the thread and even in the youtube video.

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I'm on better headphones now (I wrote my original post at work while on a break, the headphones there are crap, now I'm at home). You're right, the guitars are panned after all so it was the headphones' fault I missed that. The guitars still sound tame though and almost as if they were programmed using samples rather than actually played live. They could still pack a whole lot more punch than they do now, and you say it yourself that many people bash the tone. The bass also still sounds pretty bad. I listened to the Soundcloud link this time.

As far as genre issues go, I only grabbed onto the fact that the title was "Heavy Metal" when it was not. I did read your original post before writing the first critique.

So, aside from panning which I admit I heard wrong the first time, I still stand by the rest of my earlier comments. And I say it again, the song or riffs aren't horrible. There is a lot of room for improvement, but it's pretty good considering a 15-year-old wrote it.

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I'm on better headphones now (I wrote my original post at work while on a break, the headphones there are crap, now I'm at home). You're right, the guitars are panned after all so it was the headphones' fault I missed that. The guitars still sound tame though and almost as if they were programmed using samples rather than actually played live. They could still pack a whole lot more punch than they do now, and you say it yourself that many people bash the tone. The bass also still sounds pretty bad. I listened to the Soundcloud link this time.

As far as genre issues go, I only grabbed onto the fact that the title was "Heavy Metal" when it was not. I did read your original post before writing the first critique.

So, aside from panning which I admit I heard wrong the first time, I still stand by the rest of my earlier comments. And I say it again, the song or riffs aren't horrible. There is a lot of room for improvement, but it's pretty good considering a 15-year-old wrote it.

Thanks for the feedback! =)

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