(On hold) Pursuing an Ancient Evil (Super Metroid - Lower Norfair)

[jordanrooben]

As much as I like how the song went, my skills at remixing are not nearly enough to give justice to the potential of the mix, and for that matter the original. Any feedback, is still appreciated, but for now I won't be updating it. I just need to practice more before I can finish this.

Version 2 now up

[jordanrooben]

Anyone have any feedback?

[hewhoisiam]

For what it is, I feel like the intro is too long. It needs something to keep my interest before the main theme comes in.

The glass bell sound with the choir I think is a win. Very fun to listen to. But the track feels incomplete overall.

There is almost no bass sound aside from the very low throat gurgle synth. That synth has a way of growing old very quickly to me, it might just be my taste. Same with that drum hit. It's thin and neither one of these adds much to the song or develops as the song goes on.

When they first come in, the high wind instrument is too loud, it overpowers everything else. It's texture also doesn't mesh well with the other instruments.

This just plods along at that slow tempo. That's gotta be... eh 60? BPM? It's almost painfully slow in places.

Some wrong notes in there in the high winds near the end. This is a phrygian (thanks slygen) so they sound a bit off at certain points, but there it's noticeably wrong.

C phrygian C, Db, Eb, F, G, Ab, Bb, C for most of it. Then the break is in E phrygian E, F, G, A, B, C, D, E

[jordanrooben]

*New version on the original post*

Updates:

Shortened the intro and increase the sound level of the ambient sounds sounds.

Added some more to the bass. The ambient sounds should balance with the relative simplicity of the bass.

Added more bell effects to balance against the flute.

Trimed some of the unnecessary parts to keep it from dragging on.

[hewhoisiam]

There's still a lot to be done to really make a piece like this work. IMHO. Think about tempo and volume changes in order to build a mood or emphasize a certain part.

Another neat thing is to switch into a different key or time signature. I tend to favor more subtle things (last crit I got that I'm working on is to be more creative) so there is always original writing.

As far as originality goes, this could use some work, I only really hear the melody and back tracking, which makes it seem unfinished and kinda boring.

I like that you trimmed the intro, but it was less about length and more about composition. An intro can be long, it just has to be done 'right'. Subjective, I know, but I mean done in a way that changes, becomes dynamic, sets up other ideas. Etc.

Not bad, keep at it

[Rozovian]

Biggest problem - not interesting enough.

Slow, sparse and what initial interest the sound design held is not enough to last the whole track. Play with the track, play stuff in different rhythms, chords or whatever, come up with a few ideas for the track and see if any combination of those lend themselves to a more interesting arrangement.

Also, bass drum is too loud, choir and pad could have some lows filtered out for a more clear mix. Don't let this get you down, persevere and make more music, you'll get better. And welcome to ocr.