"Do rap and vg-mixes mix?" If someone was to ask me that question, I'd propably say no, just because...well, chocolate doesn't mix with chicken either. Then again, I hear mixes - such as this one - and I wonder if anyone has ever actually tasted chicken with chocolate.
The start of the song is pretty non-existant. It just comes from somewhere, with a smooth, relaxing bassline, and way a melody way too familiar for me (HC Sonic the Hedgehog -fan since early 90's), and here we are, with another noname white-rapper (please do correct me if I'm wrong), rapping to a beat made from a video-game music track. Seems like a flop to me. But oh no, that's not what it is: The rapper, whom I've never heard of before, actually does a good job, even though the lyrics are quite cliché and even angsty at times (Well, it's still way better than your average "50cent - ho bling drugs guns" -rapping).
What should be done differently then? Well for one, lift the beat up a notch or two: It's too quiet imo. Also, this will propably get me flamed but who cares: Leave rapping to black folks (I'm assuming from your lyrics/voice that you're white), because they are the one's who do it the best.
To sum it up, good beat+good singing=good song. Nothing spectacular, but I listen to it at least once when ever it crosses my playlist.
I wasn't trying to be mean, just honest (I'll say this before someone calls me a racist or w/e).