SLyGeN
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Posts posted by SLyGeN
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Well if you listen to the second introductory motive of your piece versus the original counterpart, you'll see that there's about a bar's worth of material removed from it. It sounded a little striking to me, since I know the original song.
As far as your solos, so long as each and every note is played with a distinct purpose, you're fine.
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Okay, my friend, along with a few tweaks and adjustments here and there, I made sure to (attempt a) fix at everything you mentioned.
Listen for:
-New intro!
-Tweaked outro!
-Tweaked velocities and levels on the piano for Sprout Tower
-Transition into Olivine Lighthouse
Once again, I'm glad you pointed out the emptiness at the beginning. I really like the beginning now. The church bells add a very nice effect to the intro, and, one who listens closely will notice I made them strike 03:00, which I think is a fitting hour for this piece.
I still need to tweak my pads a little bit. They're essentially nonexistant (or they're a bassoon).
also here, check it out.
Tin Tower is in purple, Olivine Lighthouse is in tan.
I also began to write out the theory behind what I had done, but it's become one of those moments where you look at someone's work, say "wtf was this guy on", and then realize it was your own.
Basically what I did was I repeated Cm, went to Fm, because I thought I was going to the seven chord of G phrygian. And I did, until I thought a D sounded better in the soprano, and then I moved everything up to D. So I need to go back and change that last chord in the purple to a seven chord of D phrygian... which would be .. oh. Cm. That works out nicely.
It's dinner time though. I'll do that later.
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There we go; you're in business now, Arceus.
I don't have a keyboard next to me, and I never do well during class dictation, so I didn't actually write out the melody that you used.
Evory did, however, so if I might expand upon what he said just a little bit..
Both of our walls of text might look like way too fucking much to remember, but take it a step at a time. In fact, read Evory's post first, and then read mine second. What he was discussing as far as your melodic and harmonic structure (or lack thereof) can be fixed by doing what I said regarding following a single scale.
And... oh jesus. Looking at the original song now, it appears to begin in Eb minor pentatonic, and then it moves to Db minor pentatonic with that same motive, as the intro. Eventually, after a few other modulations to other minor pentatonic-sounding scales, it briefly goes to Bb phrygian before regressing to that pentatonic sound. Pentatonic scales do include scale degrees of western scales, so I think you can still harmonize and compose as if they were western scales. But still, you've got a hell of a song to work with
Try adding some Quartal and Quintal harmony! 
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There are a few aspects that I really like, here, and a few that I don't care for.
When the track started, it felt like your idea of remixing it was simply taking out a couple of measures here and there simply because they were repeated bars. I'd just ask yourself if you honestly think it sounds better that way, or if it was just a quick way to get some variation out of the piece.
If you honestly think it's an improvement over the original, ignore me, and keep it in there. But even if you do, expand upon it! Every time you repeat that measure, I want to hear just a tiny bit of variation, even if it's as small as a grace note. If you find yourself copying and pasting multiple measures, make sure you tweak the second instance, or else it gets boring.
The mix is a bit muddy as well. That pad in the background shouldn't follow the melody because the attack on it isn't fast enough, and the release is too long. That's just the nature of pads. Keep it in there, but perhaps just make it sustain the root of the chord being played.
If you're feeling ballsy, make it crisper, add harmony, and use it as a pedal note ;D
I do like, however, that you're adding your own material to it. Sometimes it feels like its out of place, though, and that's because you aren't following a single scale with it. What that ends up sounding like is a bunch of modulations to different keys of different modes, and it feels random. If you like the jumpy nature of what you have now, consider modulating to a new key only, or a new mode only, rather than both at once. Or, when changing modes, modulate to a closely related or parallel key.
Evory is giving me some feedback on a single modulation of my own that needs work because it kinda smacks the listener upside the head. I hope he gets word of this thread so that he can give you some helpful advice.
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Is 'Excellent Metal' a new genre? Is it the kind of metal you hear in British halls while people drink tea?
You're more correct than you think. Salluz seems to be taking a liking to happy joy joy metal written by bands that work primarily in the Major key. British metal is, for the most part, just like that.
So yes, ITT, Excellent Metal is british. If I didn't hate that shit, I'd have something useful to contribute. But since I do, here's some Black Metal, instead, to caress your ears.
<- from Los Angeles! Makes me happy to see something good come out of California.(Also I was half-kidding. Those link to respectable and talented bands.)
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I'd love to give you some feedback, but any music player that isn't flash-based or tries to load on the fly never works right for me.
Tindeck has a download function. I personally use webspace like Mediafire or Speedyshare to upload files.
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At school, we use Logic 8 for digital audio sequencing. Is there a way on the Mac to access the Logic system files (like the Program Files directory on a PC) and view all of the loops/SFX in Finder?
Then, after that, is there a way for me to convert .caf files to .wav on the PC? Or alternatively, a fast way to convert them to .wav on the mac?
The method I'm using thus far is importing a loop into Logic, and using the "Save Copy As..." function, one by one. It's a bit slow and tedious.
This is so I can work with Logic's built-in shit at home. Logic has some nice rain effects that I want to use in my WIP.
Cheers
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Karl Sanders.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpKFaN1wXFA
I also like one Vangelis track that you may also enjoy.
Vangelis is probably more in line with what you normally listen to. Karl Sanders is a little different, but you did say you were looking to expand your music, and not hear more of the same.
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The soundscape in the first part does sound a little empty, and just a suggestion, I think church bells tolling in the distance, coupled with the gusts of wind, would be a pretty nice touch. I like how the music comes in after the intro, but I'm finding the piano sound in the first part way too empty -- sounds like high velocity on each note yet I'm not feeling it resonating with the rest of the piece. The transition at 2:19 is way too abrupt, and makes it seem like a poorly constructed medley, especially with the key change given the starting D conflicting with the previous Dbs, which seems a bit jarring to me. Again I suggest some bell-tolling or gong-smashing, because that's the impression this piece is giving me (although I have no idea if it's something you think makes sense). The little silences are pretty striking though, and I like that touch. The reintroduction of the drums in the end is pretty nice, and I think the synth fits in pretty nicely there. The build-up to the ending is really nice, but I think the actual finish was a tad anti-climatic, unless of course you plan to extend the piece after this.
Mm, just my opinion yep.
That's what I like to hear; thank you.
I plan to go over everything you said with a fine-toothed comb.
The transition at 2:19 has a stinger on purpose, however I do agree that it would flow better if I didn't pause for so long. I don't recall using the key of D right after Db; that's a big red flag that I'll have to look into. Sometimes, however, I think a half-step up sounds good in the interests of tension. Perhaps I'll instead move to Phrygian built on the sixth degree of the preceding key.
I also plan to add rain during the intro, and I also think church bells are a great idea. I'm eager to hear what comes of the next version.
I noticed what you meant regarding the anticlimax of the ending, and it did bother me. That was something I kinda liked in a masochistic sort of way; I thought that, along with the slowing tempo and frematta accented the feeling of sadness. However, I do love huge, epic V - i or vii - i cadences to finish a good song up as well. So I'm curious to hear from a few different people as to whether the soft ending is a good or bad thing. If everyone generally wants a big finish, I'm all for it. Perhaps I could also add more material between the huge Burned Tower section and the soft section after it, so that it has more time to die down.
Thoughts?
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I agree that it needs touching up, and there are a few areas that I plan to work on as far as sound texture. However I think a second opinion would still be helpful. Where specifically would you tweak it?
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I uploaded a new version. Now the track has Olivine Lighthouse.
I was a little disheartened to see that nobody had anything to say about the first version I uploaded. I'm pretty dead-set on getting something on this website, so help is appreciated.
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If you plan to be lazy while remixing a song, don't bother.
As far as musical dictation, you'll want to know what mode it's written in, and you'll want to know that mode well.
Having a piano nearby to check your work also helps I guess.
The best way to do it is to listen for specific scale degrees like tonics, dominants, and leading tones. Then you can fill in everything in between.
You're lucky. Music majors have to do it without a piano and a limited number of plays.
Actually, when I'm not doing dictation for a class, I just listen to a bar at once, write it out in some notation software that'll play it back for me (still listening for obvious scale degrees as an aid), and then move on to the next bar.
Hearing notes other than the top note can be tricky. You can try to hear the other voices from a harmonic standpoint (is this a triad? seventh chord? is it major? minor? diminished? augmented? none of the above?)
Or you can try to focus on the melodic structure of the middle voice and employ a similar method used for the top voice.
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I'm in a bit of a rush today, but I just wanted to quickly drop in and say that I like where the track is going before I head out. Ordinarily I'd give you some more detail on specific areas I'm about to talk about.
The gripes I have are with what (I think) is your bass drum.. well, I mean it acts like a bass drum, but what it sounds like is a bunch of ducking. I hardly know the first thing about compressors, so all I can say is mess with it until we can really hear that crisp sound of the beater hitting the bass drum. It's especially important here, because you want those blast-beats to be well noticeable (although not too overpowering).
Certain drum areas do get a little repetative, too. The one that comes to mind is the section where you keep hitting the cymbal on all four beats, and it continues for a couple or three bars.
I'm also not a drummer, so take that with a grain of salt.
Other than that, I like it. You've got a very brutal sound in the making, and I want to see where it goes from here.
Keep it metal.
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I'm pretty much gonna second everything Emunator said. The top melody sounds beautiful when it comes in, and I like some of the dynamics you added to some of the more dramatic notes, but I think you need to add some more variation to the beginning, or simply delete a few of your copypastas. I think you need to write a stronger ending, too.
I like the original material you added. There's nothing wrong with straying from the original version. For some variation, I'd say stray more in the latter parts of the mix. Try transposing the music to a different key, or different mode perhaps, and play with retrogrades and inversions to get some more mileage.
Also, those four repeating notes do get a little old after a while. Don't feel like you have to use them throughout the entire piece for the sake of staying true to the original tune. The point of a remix is to change it up a bit, right?
I like where this mix is going. I plan to lurk this thread and yell at you some more.
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Link, as of 4/18/10.
I'm taking a short break from this piece 'til summer rolls around, since I'm finding myself with less free time. I like having long, lazy afternoons to devote to this, since I'm the kind of person that likes to get loads done all at once, rather than in fragments.
I appreciate all of the suggestions and I'll continue to check back here every so often to see if there are any new ideas or comments.
Here's the source material in the order it appears:
Sprout -
Tin - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZlc09MoxPk
Olivine Lighthouse - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mpkCAmfb7Q
Burned -
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Laziness isn't going to get you a spot on the site.
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You guys aren't really being serious about the voice at the end, are you? Maybe my sarcasm detector is just going bad.
Also, I wanted to elaborate on what I said regarding the lead synth. I realize that you have the filter open up as it comes in, and of course a closed filter is going to be less prominent. I do like that effect, but still, I think the lead needs to come through more by the time the filter is open. And then this is where I say refer to my previous post if you're interested to hear what I suggest to do.
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Listening now. I want that lead to pierce through the rest of the accompaniment a little more. Perhaps detune it a bit, or use multiple oscillators that are just slightly out of phase with each other. Plus volume, of course.
You could add some variety by tweaking the modality or transposing the piece to a different key at some point. Based on the mixes I've kept, people rarely do that on this site. It should make the judges come right in their pants.
Play with retrograde, inversions, retrograde inversions, etc, as well to get some mileage out of the material you have so far. Try retrograding an entire segment, or retrograde sections divided into one or two bars.
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To effectively employ church modes, you're gonna need to research them on your own to get the full picture. But after that, it's easy to tweak shit to conform to the mode you want. This'll all make sense if you do the research. Wikipedia is a fair place to start.
The basic concept is that a mode is simply a scale with defined spacing between each of the seven notes. Church modes refer to seven modes specifically:
Ionian, Dorian, Phrygian, Lydian, Aeolian, and Locrian.
There are many more than that, and there is much more to modes than what I just described there. Begin with finding a sample of someone playing a scale in each of those seven modes, and that should intrigue you enough to further research the concept.
As far as your bass drums, I really don't know shit about compression. Frankly I just don't like it when electronic artists use a tinny sound like a bass drum, but alas many people do. That means at this point this is becoming a question of my personal opinion versus what's actually best for you.
I think what I said about filling out your frequency ranges is an objective suggestion, though, and is worth doing. Try this:
Copy your main melody,
paste the melody twice such that each one has its own range..low, middle, high. Listen to it. It'll sound .. better.
After you've done that, tweak the middle voice so that it isn't moving in parallel with the rest of them anymore. Make sure you use chord tones! don't just throw shit around. It should sound even better than before.
Now tweak the bottom voice, and do the exact same thing. Guess what? Now you have a 3-voice harmony, and your music actually has real chords.
Try adding a fourth voice.
Use the original piece as a guide.
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Right now the piece feels rather empty as far as the overall presence is concerned. I'd suggest these things:
-use more frequency bandwidth. Have a high instrument playing around in the C5 range. Have another instrument play around C3-4. Yet another around C2. And another down low. C0-1.
-make the driving beat less tinny, and change it up a bit; it got a little stale for me. Make the bass drum punch me in the chest. Incorporate other percussive instruments for more variety. Think of a basic rock kit. If you want to use electronic samples instead, great. Get a white-noisy percussion synth in there to act like a cymbal crash. Find a hard-attacking, low release, harsh synth for your snare. And I already told you what I wanted for that bass drum kick that'll blow out your eyes, hoah. droppin plates. And shit, it's an electronic instrument. Your potential for variety there is endless. Don't go more than 8 bars without changing up the percussion timbres.
-I saved the most important for last. COMPOSITION. Add some material of your own. Or make the original piece better! Or at least somehow make things different. People here don't know shit about music theory, so to be honest it's probably not as important to the judges as it is to me. You probably could get away with copying and pasting a motive and transposing it up by 7 semitones to add some musical color.
What'll really get 'em though is if you mess with the modality of the piece. It's also a cool way to add some variety and change the entire mood of the segment without too much work. Look into how the 7 church modes are related to each other.
Retrograding a motive is also a cool way to get some mileage out of your remix. It essentially doubles the length of the part your working on, and sounds way different, but the material then only needs a few minor tweaks, because the harmonic and melodic structure should have been strong to begin with. (I'm working on that Sprout Tower mix I posted way back still; Sprout Tower sounds absolutely beautiful if you play the notes backwards.) The regi themes have a rather simple melody, though, so I'm not sure if retrograding will work as well as it does with a more active melody.
HAPPY MIXING!
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The issue with the piano is that you're using such a soft instrument as your main melody, and it can barely be heard over the rhythm guitar. Turn the guitars down, and give the piano a little more oomph (if your samples incorporate timbre changes for a forte, or even fortissimo dynamic, do that too.)
Perhaps even consider turning the gain/distortion down on the guitars a little bit so that they don't contrast so much.
Make no mistake, symphonic instruments can go really, really well with guitar.
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oh, hi everyone.
Prophet, go ahead and remove anything I was selling. My wants can stick around.
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My first song was a dark and sexy waltz. I wrote it a little less than half a year ago.
I pride myself in writing very dark tunes, and in using uncommon modes. I tell people that this one is as joyous as my music ever gets.
I call it Seduction and the Snake.
Spanish-Phrygian ftw.
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Reaper 3 is already giving me a headache.
Whenever I'd run a midi track through a VSTi, I'd just delete the little block of data at the beginning of the piano roll that had the instrument data in it, because it would always cause the VSTs to behave stupidly.
I can't find that little block anymore. How do I tell Reaper to ignore the midi instrument?
edit: oh nevermind, I found it.
Super Street Fighter 2 Turbo - Ryu's Theme Remix - The Saga of a Warrior
in Post Your Game ReMixes!
Posted
I listened to your Vega remix as well as this one. I'm just going to be frank.
You need to do more than just import a midi and tweak the sound of each instrument. I realize that you added a bell and a whistle here and there, so to speak, but you need to do a hell of a lot more to it.
I'd say pick your favorite track that you've done so far and focus on it, rather than flooding the forum with midi rips. Give it an original intro and put your own personal flavor into it.
For perspective, compare your Vega mix to the original. Then find Club del Toro, which is a remix on this website of Vega's theme, and compare it to the original. You'll see what I'm talking about.