DragonAvenger Posted May 15, 2011 Share Posted May 15, 2011 Contact Information Nixdorux Nicolas Ferranti nico76@citycable.ch http://twitter.com/Nixdorux Submission Information Super Mario Bros Water World ------------------- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Palpable Posted May 15, 2011 Share Posted May 15, 2011 Biggest issue for me was the rigidity of some notes, especially the repeated staccato notes. The strings were kind of blocky and not all that fluid. The arrangement was cool and you got a lot of mileage out of the source tune, though it was languid at times and could have used some more energy or detailed writing. Some of the slower passages dragged. You definitely have a lot of creativity and that was a real strength to this piece. Your complementary writing was very good. Hone the piece down to the choice elements and vary the playing a little more, and you can get something passed for sure. NO (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonAvenger Posted May 24, 2011 Author Share Posted May 24, 2011 Vinnie pretty much nailed it here. Overall the song is sounding mechanical, which is pretty detracting from the overall sound you're going for. Add to that the length of the arrangement that has some sections that aren't really holding interest, and it's just not working as is. On the good side, you've definitely got a good sense of arranging, and I liked a lot of the ideas you presented here. If you can get some more humanization in this, along with paring down the arrangement you'll definitely be on the right track. NO (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OceansAndrew Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I do agree that it sounds pretty stiff overall, and a lot of the chords end up blocky, but there is some really nice writing in here. The arrangement did feel really long, and some parts dragged, but there were flashes of brilliance throughout. I suggest taking a listen again, humanize it to the best of your ability, and trim some of the extensions down a little. It's a really nice start. No, please resubmit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts