Noob here. Sky Garden - Mario Kart DS/GBA

[Jamish]

First WIP posted here.

None of my friends are willing or able to give me constructive criticism, which sucks because I want to improve. This is my first real attempt at mastering (I'm using FL Studio). I can tell something is "off" in terms of the overall sound of it, but I don't know what to change.

Please, give me criticism, even if it's harsh

http://tindeck.com/listen/ucdq

http://tindeck.com/listen/fzmk (Revision 2)

EDIT: Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dst3ST2qCxA

[pokemoneinstein]

Fellow noob here. I love this song. Now as for your version:

The arrangement is great, I'm really liking this a lot. The problem is, it seems far wetter than you want, and it sounds to me like it's mostly reverb. Take some of that off of everything, especially the drums. And speaking of the drums, the kick could be made both clearer and louder. The lead can also be EQed a bit. I'd say it should be brightened up a good amount. And as for some of the synth choices, I wouldn't use those orchestra hits. If I were you, I'd use some other sort of synth, possibly chiptunes, even. And there are some instruments that sound almost like harpsichords and xylophones. I'd suggest changing those, too, this ReMix sounds too synthy for those to work well as-is. I'm sure it can be done, but I'm no help in suggesting how, so if I were you I'd just change them.

Don't regard anything I say as anything more than opinion and possibility, though. I'm also just learning.

But in fact, I'm trying to get interest going in a Mario Kart remix project. Maybe you could keep working on this as a remix for the album.

[Jamish]

I lowered the wetness of the reverb, and it sounds much cleaner. I increased the upper frequencies of the kick, and that seemed to improve some clarity by adding a little "clickiness."

What instruments sound like harps/xylophones to you? Is it the part that comes on at around 0:48?

Thanks for the feedback so far, I appreciate you listening.

[pokemoneinstein]

The harpsichord-like instrument is very audible around 1:10, and the xylophone-like one is clear at 1:57

[Lampje4life]

Lead synths are definately lacking. Which is a total shame because I like what you did with the song.

There is so much variation and it never gets boring. Good stuff.

A change of a few synths and some EQ'ing can do this track justice. You got a PM

[Jamish]

@pokemoneinstein: Thanks, I'll look into changing the harpsichord-like instrument and experiment a bit. As for the xyolophone-like one, it doesn't sound bad to me but I'll play around with it, at least to make it less plucky.

@Lampje4life: I'll see what I can do with the lead synth, maybe I just need to pick a new one altogether. Did any EQ problems jump out at you in particular?

I'll keep working here and post an updated version soon.

[pokemoneinstein]

Can't wait to see what you come up with

EDIT: Now that I think about it, those orchestra hits might be perfect for the introduction.

[Ethan Rex]

I agree with the fact that it sounds wet; that's making the track sound messy. That bass at the first is a good example.

EQ things. that will help a lot to clean stuff up. Rozovian has a really sweet remixing guide that helped me a lot with how EQ works.

Your leads aren't THAT bad, but they are getting lost behind everything else. I would advice bringing them out to see how they sound before switching them out.

Arrangement is pretty nice. Good work.

[pokemoneinstein]

How's this track coming along? It's been a while since you posted the first version.

[Jamish]

I've been hard at work at overhauling most of the synths, added some parts, and changing some effects. Let me know what you guys think of the changes.

• Entirely new synths for the lead and those harpsichord/xylophone instruments. Replaced the orchestral hit, too. As per @pokemoneinstein's suggestion, going for a chiptune feel made it much better IMO.
  
• The bassline has a low-pass cutoff that is faded out for the intro.
  
• Added "slide up/down" sounds during a build.
  
• Gave the main synth some notes when the percussion first cuts out. Same notes show up in the outro, too.
  
• Added a piano part at the end. Tried to humanize the note timing/velocity
  
• Enhanced the stereo of some instruments
  
• Random EQ, volume changes, filter levels, etc.
  

http://tindeck.com/listen/fzmk (Revision 2)

[pokemoneinstein]

Wow, the chip tune sounds are great! The slides and things you've done with the lead sound nice, but I think I prefer the old synth. Overall, the leads seem like they should be less gritty in this mix. The harpsichord thing sounds much better, and this is coming along very nicely. There are other things that need fixing, but unfortunately, I'm not so good at reviewing yet. I can't put my finger on it, so someone who's more experienced would be better help here.