Nynja Posted September 8, 2014 Share Posted September 8, 2014 i would like to submit this remix, but i'd like to know what you guys think first. feedback please, specifically negative feedback, so i can try and improve this track. Here Is A Soundcloud Link Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
about:blank Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 I think you've got a lot going here, so I'll get the criticism out of the way first. The intro, while some elements are executed well, drags on a bit too long. The bass synth is great, and I like how you work it into the original melody later. That said, as far as ReMix standards are concerned, I think you need to put in something more recognizable to the source during the first minute -OR- make the intro a little shorter. The chords that come in around 0:50 sound really muddy. My advice would be to either apply some EQ and change the instrument/synth you're using. As it stands, it sounds a little dissonant/loud. If you turned down that part, then the panned synths at 1:02 will stand out a little more. Things start getting more recognizable at 1:14. Honestly, it would be a vast improvement alone if you cut about 30 seconds out of the intro and got to this point sooner. I really like the lead you use when things get started at 1:27. This part is great, but it ends so soon! The drums stop at 1:39, less than 20 seconds after they started, and it's back to another buildup. Making this section longer to compensate for a shorter intro would work much better IMO. 1:39 - 2:04 is a good place to change some parts up. I hear some new instruments coming in, but they're buried in the mix. Cutting out the bassline and emphasizing the piano during this section will add some dynamic flair. The sounds are a tad muddy at 2:04, but otherwise I like what's happening. The lead is prominent and the drums sound good. Try to tone down the reverb and adjust the EQ a bit to make each individual sound stand out more. Also the part at 2:20 is awesome! I'd love to hear more bits like that. tl;dr I think the mix needs more action. You've got the foundation for a powerful track, but the awesome parts need to be expanded and other instruments like the piano should be given more attention. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
timaeus222 Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 (edited) There's mainly a problem with how these instruments are handled. The bass that goes on throughout is pretty boomy, and can use some cutting in the EQ in the low-mids. It might also be too loud, but it could just be the EQ. The pad at 0:50 just has too much EQ below 200Hz. It needs to be high-passed at about 200Hz, and the reverb should have a low cut close to 200Hz to prevent low end ambience on frequencies that would then not reach down there. There's also too much reverb. When we do finally get to Spark Mandrill's theme at 1:14, the melody is just too low in pitch to stand up to the backing elements without muddying things up more. It's hard to tell what instrument it actually is. I would recommend raising it an octave and using an instrument with more expressiveness. Also, the lead is very similar to the one from the original. The low arp and snare are getting buried under all the excessive reverb. The snare has quite a bit of reverb too, and the kick should be sidechained to the bass if it hasn't been already. The toms are good. The SFX at the end is a touch loud. Overall, too much reverb on the pad, snare, and maybe lead, too much low end clutter in the EQ of the bass, pad, and kick, the arrangement should be reworked to make sure the instruments are playing at reasonable octaves, and some instruments could be changed to make it sound less conservative (i.e. more differentiated from the source tune). Edited September 19, 2014 by timaeus222 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nynja Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 I think you've got a lot going here, so I'll get the criticism out of the way first....... Hey thank you very much for the reply! and thanks for going through and analyzing each part. I'm not sure how much of the original you'll remember, but i went through each thing you said one by one, and hopefully achieved closer to what you were talking about. Tried to EQ out as much low end from each instrument as i could, took off a LOT of reverb, worked on dynamic flair, and changed up a few other things. The main thing you mentioned was how long the intro was. I particulary liked the long intro, because i like the fact that the listener has no idea what song it is until the recognizable melody comes in. That being said, i did take your advice and shortened it by about 20 seconds. So thank you for bringing that up, becuase just because I like something, doesn't mean it needs to be in the track. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nynja Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 There's mainly a problem with how these instruments are handled.The bass ... ... Thank you for going in depth with the issues in my track. I tried to do all the things you mentioned, including some very needed EQ adjustments. Did some work on the snare, and got rid of a lot of reverb. I updated the link in my original post, but here it is again: https://soundcloud.com/nynjamusic/sparks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
timaeus222 Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 (edited) Okay, there are some better dynamics this time around, which is nice to hear. But is it just me, or did things get louder somehow? At 0:25, the pad is a little loud (~3dB), and the arp is too (~2dB). Isn't there stuff underneath it? If so, it's getting piled upon. At 0:50 - 1:02, the lead is too loud, by about 3 dB in the low-mids frequencies. Its volume in general feels better at 1:02, so that's why I referred to the EQ. When you drop things off at 1:26, the main vibe still stays the same---synth brass lead, arp, phaser stuff is all still there. Might want to keep polishing that section to differentiate it from the others. Maybe try adding in some new sounds and lowering the busy-ness of the arrangement as a whole in that section. The phaser gets really harsh and resonant at 1:49, and the piano is too robotically sequenced; needs more velocity variation and rhythmic error. It doesn't have to be realistic in this context, but it would help to be less unrealistic. Other than that and more mixing polish, this is a good improvement. Keep up the updates. Edited October 7, 2014 by timaeus222 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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