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*NO* Doom "Phobos Anomaly"


Rexy
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Hello!

 
Thanks for reviewing this track!
 
Contact Information
Remixer name: NbZero
Real name: Lauri Karvonen
Website: https://soundcloud.com/nothingbutzero
Userid: 29276
 
Game: Doom (1993) by id Software
Track title: Phobos Anomaly
 
Original composer Robert "Bobby" Prince, Doom is already added on the site with some existing remixes. 
 
This track have been arranged and recorded using ProTools, Adobe Audition and Reason software, with guitars and bass recorded through Line6 Pod Hd500x amp modeller. 
 
Track is arranged with modern metalcore and djent inspired rhythm section with a more late 80's classic heavy metal lead. Arranged for an 8-string guitar with standard F# tuning. The second half of the track also has a more toned-down, clean mid-way break with added guitar 3rd harmonics. 
 
Cheers and thanks,
Lauri Karvonen
 
 
Edited by Rexy
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  • 3 months later...

Is it just me or does the lead guitar sound like it's a few cents high in pitch generally?  I also hear many sour guitar notes beginning at 1:03 and continuing until 1:34.   The mixing of this track is serviceable but the lead sounds quite small and thin.  The choir/pad instrument that plays throughout the track is verbatim from the source, it is repetitive as it only plays two notes and often it clashes with the rhythm guitar writing in the remix.  It would be good to use a different filler instrument perhaps during the breakdown, that is a good opportunity to introduce more interest as well as a build toward the final chorus.  More sour guitar notes from 2:31 until the end of the track.  Covering this source this conservatively in metal isn't exactly groundbreaking; the arrangement itself is really too conservative to stand alone as a remix.  I can't pass this until the mixing and sour notes are addressed at a minimum, but I'm thinking that other than the breakdown it may be too conservative even with these issues addressed.

NO 

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  • Chimpazilla changed the title to 2020/05/13 - (1N) Doom "Phobos Anomaly"

The lead does sound off, particularly in the 1:02 and 2:31 sections as Chimpa mentioned. The pad sound is very weak. The mid-point introduces a lighter take on the theme, but it’s not doing anything awfully different. Arrangement is very conservative, with not much in the way of additional material added, placing this quite firmly in cover territory. Production is ok but could do with some clarity. It’s not a bad mix — there are a lot of opportunities here, but in its current state, it feels like it’s in draft form, waiting for retakes.

NO

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There's nothing wrong with a two-textural-variation route, and I can see that with the full-on doom metal vibes (bad pun!) for the first one and a cute non-overdrive breakdown at 1:32 marking the start of the second.  However, aside from the textural shaping on the rhythm guitars, the notation is note-for-note, even with the pads doing the same thing.  To shake off similarities between leads, try and play the melody with some minor differences, like adding other notes, articulations, and any original lick replacing a written sustained note over 2 bars.  Some methods off the top of my head to change up the pads are to let them play a chord inversion lower or higher, apply a rhythmic gate, or keep the part as it is but put an arpeggiator over the top.  Experiment and see what happens.

The production aspect feels okay but can do with some improvements.  Firstly, the guitar tone itself feels thin and lacks brightness, so it's worth experimenting with the EQ and seeing if you can get a thicker sound.  Secondly, yes, the choir pad can benefit from changeups, as Kris pointed out - but I also think the sound isn't as thick as a choir would usually have, so consider doubling it up with another pad and putting them on separate sides of the stereo field.  And most importantly, I co-sign with Kris and Joel regarding the lead guitar texture.  When hearing some samples from your Doom EP, the lead's off-pitch timbre was a significant issue that sunk the experience.  The tone is a few cents higher than it should be and becomes more apparent when going through the B sections (1:03, 2:31).  It is by far the biggest dealbreaker and is worth looking into during your next project.  

There are some good ideas there, Lauri - but it's not interpretive enough in its current form, and the lead guitar and pads need thickening up.  But most importantly, the lead guitar's tuning is a glaring fault that needs addressing before you even think of writing something else.  It's a lot to take in, but I only want the best from you, and I hope you keep going with your craft.

NO

Edited by Rexy
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  • Rexy changed the title to *NO* Doom "Phobos Anomaly"
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