I dont know why but the intro reminds me of little eyes from Yo La Tengo. I know it's a stretch, but it does. All in all, it's sleepy. Sounds like something Annie Lennox would sing... and I would promptly change the station on the radio. I don't like how the synths go with what you're singing. It comes across cheesy. Let your voice pull off the melody, not the synth... unless you want to add some much needed bass with your voice via the synth. I know you said not to bust on the vocals, but you have a lot of work to do before this is production. If you can't hit the "yeaaah" note, don't sing it. Get someone else to. My advice, contract your throat as you get higher. Do not try to sing the high notes with the same inflection as the mid ranged notes. It'll add a sexy, "grit" to your voice and increase your range. You need to project into the microphone on your next takes. Bigtime. Make it sound like a woman is singing, not a girl. As it is right now, the voice sounds like something you'd hear on Nick Jr. That has *nothing* to do with your voice, but more how you decide to give your voice body and depth. Next time you record, put emotion into it. Sing as though no one is there and you really mean what you're saying. You may feel foolish at first, but when you hear the difference it makes, it'll go away. Also, make sure you stay on key. Practice practice practice, you can do it! All in all, it's a good first cut. Expect a lot of revision before it's production quality, though. Hey, and when you get that recording equipment, can I borrow it sometime This 1/8th inch mono plug I have ain't cuttin it.