DragonAvenger Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 Hi there, I'm submitting a track for EdenShard, which is a band composed of myself and Logan Felber. Here's the data: ReMixer name: EdenShard Real Name: John French/Logan Felber Email Address: Jerionmusic@gmail.com Website: http://edenshard.bandcamp.com Userid: 47441 Game: Jazz Jackrabbit 2 The title of our arrangement is "This Jackrabbit is Augmented" The track it was based on is "Laboratory Level" Track is attached. If that does not work it may also be found here: The composer of the original track was Alexander Brandon. Note: The EdenShard OCRemix forum account is awaiting activation at time of sending this message. Cheers, John French ------------- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonAvenger Posted November 19, 2011 Author Share Posted November 19, 2011 Those first notes made me think I was listening to some I like Gaga, so this is a good thing. I think this track is pretty good overall, but there are some things that are pulling it down as is. The first is that the track is wayyyy close to the source, both structurally and melodically. I was waiting for you to break out into a solo or your own thing, but it never happened, and I felt like I was listening to the track on loop a few times. There are a ton of cool details that you've added, but it needs more arrangement!Your drum loop gets way boring pretty fast. For all the other details you have added, the fact that it's stuck in one gear surprises me. I'd love to hear some fills and change-ups! Production overall is OK, although there seems to be not much bass presence for a lot of the track. Overall there are some areas that could be humanized as well. The source itself is pretty fantastic, and I can see why you'd want to keep it in tact, but I think this just stays too close to the source, and the drums need some fixin' up. Hope you look this one over again. NO (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emunator Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 Couldn't agree more with Deia here - simply put, you're just sticking way too close to the source The end result on your end is enjoyable because of how strong the original is, but this isn't really what OCR is looking for in terms of reinterpretation. NO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Palpable Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 Yeah, pretty decent production here, but the song is basically a recreation of the original, not much rearrangement. If you've got something you've modified more, send it our way! NO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OceansAndrew Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 I think you could pretty easily enhance this with some original ideas and harmonies, as well as rhythms and textures. It definitley feels like a solid blank canvas to work some artistic magic on, so go get'em! No, please resubmit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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