Chimpazilla Posted September 24, 2014 Share Posted September 24, 2014 (edited) Remixer Name: Greyvoice Real Name: Morgan Mills Email Address: Name Of Games Arranged: Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards Name of Arrangement: Forest Of Strings Name Of Song Arranged: Quiet Forest (level 2) Edited October 8, 2014 by Liontamer closed decision Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chimpazilla Posted September 25, 2014 Author Share Posted September 25, 2014 What a lovely genre-swap idea for this cute little source. It is minimalistic and relaxing. The arrangement is conservative, follows source very closely, even the choir coming in toward the middle, but it sounds nice. The noodling from 1:25 - 2:01 is nice as well. Unfortunately, it appears that a good chunk of the second half of this track is strictly cut and paste. 2:01 - 3:18 is a cut and paste of 0:00 - 1:15. Even the guitar squeaks line up. This is a shame. If you can write something different after 2:01, or even the same writing but played differently, continue to reference the source melody but with a little bit of variation, this would work. Maybe try a different pad for the second half, that would add even more variation, and/or you could add additional elements. Then it would need a unique ending as well. I'd really like to hear this one again with a revised second half. NO (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nutritious Posted October 7, 2014 Share Posted October 7, 2014 Nice adaptation to the acoustic guitars. Great mood setter that really compliments the feels of the original. Off the bat, timing on the backing arpeggio sounds both a bit loose and rigid at the same time, if that makes any sense. Loose in the sense that some of the notes on the back end of the looped recording (I'm assuming it's a chopped loop) are a little off beat, while the quick delay effect gives it a bit of an artificial rigidity. Minor issue, but I'd try to do a quick bit of editing to line up the notes better on the pattern. The more I listen, the more I like the delay effect, so I'd keep that. Nice arrangement work and ideas. Though I'd like to see a little more expansion on the theme (see below). But yeah, Kristina's nailed the main issue here, which is the verbatim repeat for a good chunk of the track. The last third of the track would be a great opportunity to expand the arrangement further and play with the source a bit more, rather than just repeat what's already been heard (nice as the guitars sound ) Great start here! Get it a bit more developed and bring it back quick. NO resubmit, please Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liontamer Posted October 8, 2014 Share Posted October 8, 2014 Great praise & criticisms by both Chimpa and Nutritious that I fully agreed with. What a lovely genre-swap idea for this cute little source. It is minimalistic and relaxing. The arrangement is conservative, follows source very closely, even the choir coming in toward the middle, but it sounds nice. The noodling from 1:25 - 2:01 is nice as well.Unfortunately, it appears that a good chunk of the second half of this track is strictly cut and paste. 2:01 - 3:18 is a cut and paste of 0:00 - 1:15. Even the guitar squeaks line up. This is a shame. If you can write something different after 2:01, or even the same writing but played differently, continue to reference the source melody but with a little bit of variation, this would work. Maybe try a different pad for the second half, that would add even more variation, and/or you could add additional elements. Then it would need a unique ending as well. I'd really like to hear this one again with a revised second half. Co-signed. Verbatim repetition can be permissible in relatively limited amounts within the big picture, but it's often done at the expense of development of the arrangement. Do something different with 2:01-3:18 to offer some sort of variation, dynamic contrast, or further development, and you'd be more likely to have a shot at passing. Great concept and one I think you successfully personalized despite the conservative structure of the arrangement, but don't make the final section of such a relatively short piece an extended copy-pasta when you can offer something more substantive. Awesome stuff so far, Morgan; definitely don't give up on this one. NO (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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