Chavous Posted November 4, 2006 Share Posted November 4, 2006 Alright, so a couple days ago my dad asked me to compose a song for him to use to DJ weddings, just to fill up space for one of the event-thingies. Anyway, I composed this piece, 8 minutes long (I've never writeen anything above 4 mins. before, so this is a rarity), for him in about 5 hours. This song got out a whole bunch of emotions I have had building up. I know of the usual problems (the snare is a little too dry, some parts have volume problems, and in the key change the sax is a little too high), but I seriously need the comments about everything. http://www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemusic.cfm?bandID=406786 Thanks to everyone who leaves a comment. P.S. - Song critic for song critic, If you give good detail. I leave elaborate crtics. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
realpolitik Posted November 4, 2006 Share Posted November 4, 2006 hmm, another work by none other than chavous. lets see. did you intentionally want the drums to sound kinda filtered? because they do. it seems like it's mastered a little soft to me, maybe normalize it? i also really dont see the maroon 5 analogy this is pretty chill though. i'm familiar with that sax soundfont, and it'd probably sound better an octave down. get a black soul singer and you got this song DOWN. haha. that epiano is really sweet too. nice stuff yo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chavous Posted November 5, 2006 Author Share Posted November 5, 2006 Alright, thanks for the quick reply. The drums are meant to be kind of in the background...now that you mention it I should turn up the highs... My mastery, for some reason, always seems a little soft...I'm going to have to check on that. The only reason I put Maroon 5-ish is because when this song is playing, I randomly think of "Sunday Morning" for some reason. I have this feeling that the sax is a little more emotional when it's in that octave, I was thinking of just turning down the reverb, but I'll try it an octave lower. Haha, yea, thanks. As for the epiano...I really wasn't going to leave it there, but it ended up sounding good, so I left it. Alright, thanks. I'll return the favor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoeTaKa Posted November 5, 2006 Share Posted November 5, 2006 I like this arrangement, though I feel I'm about to sing karaoke , it carries nice. The mastering is soft and slightly bland to me aswell, cause of reverbs and EQ. Big lack of Higher EQ's, the rhythm of this song would be warmer with them, since you're going for this slow dance feel. Drums sound like they have hardly any reverb, sounds like in this they should be much more bouncy from a good amount of reverb in the background. No hats? Im sure a simple light 4/4 beat on them would work simple wonders at times. Your saxophone sounds do my head in, only cause I know what they are . They'd come off much nicer if they were brighter, and had more fluency in their velocities. The arrangement is good, mostly. about 2/3rds into the song I wanted a new feel, new rhythm...got tired of those old drum fills. What this needs is better dynamics, places where it lifts more, places where it drops more. For example, halfway'ish through the song, the EP goes into this great part where suddenly it's played alot harder with more ideas, great part, but the backing just doesnt compliment it dynamically...see my point? Props to you either way though, great slow ballad feel. Im sure it'll fit in just right into the DJ set, just work on the mastering and it'll be great. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chavous Posted November 7, 2006 Author Share Posted November 7, 2006 Thanks Roe, I took your comments and realpolitik's into account, and now have an updated version. The only thing about Roe's comment about dynamics...I can't quite figure out where to place the new dynamics, so I just kind of left it as is. http://www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemusic.cfm?bandID=406786 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoeTaKa Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 I think this sounds better, can't remember the old version well. But, this song gives me a smile and I'm glad I can download it now . Don't worry about the dynamics, I like this how it is. Haha, the part at 3:34 makes think some other song is on till the sax kicks back in, love this section. Is there an addition of a rhodes in the fourth minute? It supports some really lovely harmony. The dynamics of this section are definately alot fuller than previously. Good job my man, lets slow dance till I'm dribbling down your back . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chavous Posted November 10, 2006 Author Share Posted November 10, 2006 Ohh, Roe, take it slow, man. Actually, that's a vibraphone, not a rhodes, but you got the jist, and I'm glad SOMEONE thinks that a tritone can be beautiful. And yea, that is one of my favorite sections, and it almost wasn't there...it was a last minute thought. Glad you like it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chavous Posted November 14, 2006 Author Share Posted November 14, 2006 Gonna bump this a couple more times...see if I can't get a few more comments. Remember, I'll return the favor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chavous Posted December 8, 2006 Author Share Posted December 8, 2006 One final bump. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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