Liontamer Posted March 15, 2023 Share Posted March 15, 2023 (edited) Contact Information: ReMixer name: BurningMagma Real name: Elijah Wiencek Email: User ID: ocremix.org/community/profile/38331-burningmagma/ Submission Information: Name of game arranged: My Singing Monsters Playground Name of arrangement: Chorus of the Sea Name of individual song arranged: Water Island Additional Information: Composers: Dylan Cole, Sam Clark, Tom Meikle Link to original soundtrack: www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNgR45vm8cY Comments: I've been playing the original mobile game for a while now, and when My Singing Monsters Playground came onto the Nintendo Switch, I knew I had to do something. Then I wondered, "How could I make a tribute to my childhood?". ReMixing was my answer, so this week (as of writing this), I tried out mixing the Water Island theme. After messing around in FL Studio while having 8 GB of ram, I present to you "Chorus of the Sea". -BurningMagma Edited April 10, 2023 by Liontamer closed decision Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liontamer Posted March 15, 2023 Author Share Posted March 15, 2023 For the source, the drum writing was super basic and the brass samples were pretty exposed, but it's an energetic theme; nice choice here. For the arrangement, the opening piano timing's very mechanical. OK, lots of parts are rigidly timed/looped. Smart usage of the source's intro line interpretively arranged and used as the countermelody for your arrangement at :29; very cool. The "ocean wave" first used at :13 seemed a bit gimmicky as it got used at :27, :42, and :55 (and more); sounds kind of bitcrushed rather than actual ocean, so it comes off more like an overused sweep, but I see how it's meant to work with the chiptune lead (and the arrangement title, of course). The drumkit writing at :15's actually more interesting than the source's (which was very metronome-ish there), but this kit had a flimsy tone, so the drums don't lend much energy or depth from 1:15-1:29 when the soundscape should have felt more filled in. Your textural variations are in the right direction, but -- particularly if you're not looking to extend the length of this barely 2-minute track -- consider other variations on the melody at :59 and/or 1:22. Otherwise, it feels like a mix-and-match looping of the different building blocks, too much cut-and-paste-style building of the track. For OCR's Submission Standards, a track this short shouldn't feel like it has a lot of outright repetition or the arrangement will be perceived as underdeveloped. Introducing other writing variations could move this in the right direction; just be wary of extending this without developed-enough and fluid enough writing to justify it; this pacing with these textures would definitely drag out as is. Some different padding or more active writing than just the current bassline could also help give this a more sophisticated and cohesive texture. Right now, the bassline tended to add what felt more like an indistinct low hum/drone that also added mud. The bassline's complimenting music that's very locked to grid, so the energy feels very stilted, though your drums and supporting chiptune lines help in terms of the energy level. No big deal, but some leftover residual noise came back in after the track faded to 0 at 2:07, so watch the cutoff. Though the other judges may have better insight, I felt the overall mixing was solid and I could hear the parts well aside from the indistinct bassline critiques. Very good potential here, Elijah. Other Js may be able to offer some suggestions on giving this a livelier energy and further writing variations; those seem to be the main drawbacks here. NO (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MindWanderer Posted April 7, 2023 Share Posted April 7, 2023 Funny thing is, I got very different impressions but came to the same conclusion. The first thing I hear is a really loud bass triangle wave. Like, so loud I feel it in my gut, even with my fairly low-end headphones. The whole thing is mixed unnecessarily loud, and even clips, but that bass triangle is overwhelmingly loud even beyond that. I can only listen to this for so long, so I apologize if I missed any issues. I don't have a problem with rigid piano in an otherwise synth soundscape. And I don't hear a noise at 2:07, but there are about 9 seconds of silence at the end that should be trimmed out. I do totally agree with Larry about other points, though: it loops the main hook far too many times, and the percussion kit is underwhelming (I mostly here just a severely low-passed snare). It is a good start, but watch the volume levels and try to use more than just the main hook to tie it together. The source material has several other melodic sections you can borrow from, as well as changes in harmony, and you can always throw in some original writing as well. NO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chimpazilla Posted April 8, 2023 Share Posted April 8, 2023 The bass is loud, and simplistically written. Lead that begins at 0:07 is super loud and piercy and dry, with no interest or movement on it, and it plays the exact same motif all through the arrangement. It sounds more to me like a placeholder lead until a better sound can be found and more interesting part-writing can be written. Although this entire arrangement is extremely simplistic and repetitive, I think it could work, if that primary lead sounded better and had some variations in writing, rather than always being the same thing. Also some filter movement or other effects happening periodically would really help. But as it stands, this arrangement consists of just a few loops layered in various ways with zero changes to them over time and it is too simple and repetitive. Why not add some other element in the second half, like a pad or different lead or something, dropping something out at the same time so the soundscape isn't overcrowded. It just needs more interest as an arrangement. NO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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