Liontamer Posted January 19, 2007 Share Posted January 19, 2007 I'm calling this remix "Akai Hitomi" (Japanese for 'red eyes'), and it is based off the temple music for Zelda 2: Adventure of Link. (It's called 'red eyes' because it's made about Dark Link, who has red eyes in the game...) Oh, and this is my first submission, so be kind! ^^ More info: Username: raiyneofgailin Email: zelda_lullaby@yahoo.com Let me know if you need any other information, Raiyne ------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.zophar.net/nsf/zelda2.zip - Track 8 *Piano sequencing was VERY rigid and repetitive; bassline wasn't nearly audible enough to contribute anything of note *Drumwork was alright, but the pattern quickly became too repetitive; don't ride cruise control with a loop, vary the writing up or it becomes boring *Vocals at :50 were simple but fine on the performance side, though the recording is unfortunately really crappy; can hear tons of artifacts whenever the vocals come in *Stuff at 2:17-2:26 referencing another part of the source didn't even seem in the right key *Strings brought in at 2:19 were way too loud and started drowning everything else out alongside the vox *Arrangement was somewhat interpretive, but directionless overall A decent base, but very unfocused on the arrangement side and way too rough on the production side. NO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jillian Aversa Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 Oh, and this is my first submission, so be kind! ^^ Nice going there, Larry. I can see what you were going for here, Raiyne, and I actually really like it from an arrangement standpoint. I don't think the repetitiveness is that much of a problem, actually, because the source tune lends itself well to the dark, atmospheric background of a vocal track... Reminds me a lot of "Teardrop" by Massive Attack in that respect. You have a great voice, too, from what I can tell! Just can't hear it very well, which brings me to my next point. Production is definitely what's dragging you down for the most part, as I see it. If you fixed things up but didn't change much in the arrangement, I'd probably pass it, but I know some other judges would be sticklers about the repetition, so hopefully you can achieve the best of both worlds by adding in an original section or two to break things up. Anyway, problems: * As Larry already pointed out, the piano sequencing is very rigid at the moment. * Piano is also way too loud with respect to all the other instruments. We've gotta hear more of that sweet bassline, and your voice! * The vocal recordings themselves sound pretty hissy. If you're serious about getting a song up on this site, I think it would be worth it to buy a decent mic. (I'd recommend the Samson CO1U USB mic... That's what I use now, and it rocks! Hardly have to do anything to clean up the sound.) * I'm hearing a lot of clipping, and I'm not sure if it's in the vocal recordings themselves or just a result of your overall mixing. You've gotta be much more sensitive about balance and levels. * The strings that come in at 2:41 are great in that they provide a sense of climax, but yes, there are some wrong notes in there. The third chord of that repeated progression is wrong for the key every time. * There are some wrong notes in the little melody that enters at 2:17, and again at 2:23. Same deal; they don't fit in the key. So yeah, those are the main problems. Larry's suggestion about varying up the percussion a little more is definitely a good idea, because that in combination with lower piano levels and better sequencing could make things sound much more organic. But yeah... I really wanna see a resubmission of this piece, because the concept is awesome and I think you could learn a lot about the technical process through reworking things. Don't be afraid to ask for help in the #ocrwip IRC channel or on the WIP forums! Really, I like this enough that I wouldn't mind working through things one-on-one if you pop me an email. I wanna help you get this mix passed, because I see a lot of potential in you as a mixer!!! You remind me a lot of myself when I first got involved in this scene. NO PLEASE RESUBMIT! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vig Posted February 27, 2007 Share Posted February 27, 2007 The velocity of the piano is completely uniform. Got to have the dynamics. The singing sounded really nice when it came in, but it was there for about one second all alone and then it disappeared..very odd. tons of technical problems in this track. besides the mechanical sequencing, there's fuzz in the vocal recording, the piano is mixed way too loud, there's a ton of distortion, the mixing is unbalanced, and on the harmonic side, the strings play a whole bunch of bad notes. lots of things to fix. NO but your voice is super sexy. Thumbs up for sex-appeal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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