This was the original above
Below is the remix
The original track has a lot of room to breathe, very specifically tuned drums to match the synth, and the synth has some mid/low EQ to really fill the space coupled with some noticeable reverb. What you've added, especially around 0:48/0:49 with the bass really grounds the song, making it feel a lot fuller. You'll need to make sure that the song feels full of energy and not just "busy" by adding a little more room for the melody to breathe. Additionally, I would tune the drums in the same keys that the original song is to get a similar effect/feel. Also - if you listen to my songs, I love panning drums - but make sure you're not over doing it. We want it to feel frantic and full of energy - we don't want it to just feel busy and cluttered. To do this, you can pick and choose what's panning, usually you'll want your drums to have relatively set panning locations maybe with the exception of closed hats (as you'll see often that there are 2 to 4 closed hats in this style music each with a preset pan to give the perception of movement, usually between 20L and 20R). I think having the synth pan is fine, especially if the percussion is grounded - again the goal is chaos while avoiding clutter. As a style recommendation, having a low end drum or rumble would really add a semblance of stability in the first 30 seconds to foreshadow your bass entering later. This way it kind of teases that it's more than just this tension you have built up in the beginning.
If you want to jump in the #workshop discord channel - feel free to @ me (@Xaleph) if you want to share screens to go over any of this, would love to see this song in a finished state!