Jason Covenant Posted October 8, 2011 Share Posted October 8, 2011 Not sure if I should submit this or not. http://jasoncovenant.com/ghost-in-wilys-machine Either way, it was fun to make. I *might* make a few last minute changes, but as far as I'm concerned it's basically done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperiorX Posted October 8, 2011 Share Posted October 8, 2011 I really liked the atmospheric string and piano intro section, it really set the mood. The synth that came in around 0:42 took me by surprise a bit, but I really like the way it sounds. The transition section at 1:48 sounds great too. I think it does capture that spooky Halloween feel that you described quite nicely. Overall, I really like it. I'm not sure it's quite ready for submission though. It sounds like it could use a little more polish. And the drum loops feel pretty repetitive too, it seems like those could be sequenced a bit better, or just add in some more variation. Great job overall though! EDIT: and oh yeah I love the title. Clever & witty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gario Posted October 8, 2011 Share Posted October 8, 2011 Ooo, I was hoping to hear someone remix this song. Very nice. I wouldn't submit it in the state it's in, though - the synths and samples used are just too thin. The soundscape is incredibly hollow, and I don't think with the style you have going here that would be acceptable. You need some midrange instruments, and some thicker sounds (save for that 'ghost' synth - that'd lose all of it's flavor if you did anything to it ). The track is pretty conservative for OCR. There are some neat breakdowns and very natural improvisations, though, so I think the arrangement could be passable. It is pretty short, though. The drums are pretty weak. Not just the repetitive nature of them, the set itself doesn't have enough to really push the song forward. The snare is barely noticeable, and the bass just doesn't add any flavor to the track. The drums can really make or break a track, so set some stronger, more distinctive samples to use, here. Especially if you're going the 'untz untz' route, you need to have the bass break my balls, here, and this one just isn't cutting it. All that being said, I actually like the instrument combination (just need some more sound, overall), and that ghost instrument is pretty awesome. I just don't think it's ready for submission, as it stands. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Covenant Posted October 8, 2011 Author Share Posted October 8, 2011 I really liked the atmospheric string and piano intro section, it really set the mood. The synth that came in around 0:42 took me by surprise a bit, but I really like the way it sounds. The transition section at 1:48 sounds great too. I think it does capture that spooky Halloween feel that you described quite nicely. Thanks. Overall, I really like it. I'm not sure it's quite ready for submission though. It sounds like it could use a little more polish. And the drum loops feel pretty repetitive too, it seems like those could be sequenced a bit better, or just add in some more variation. Well, it breaks pretty frequently already. Not sure what else I can do there. I can always add more drum layers though. I wouldn't submit it in the state it's in, though - the synths and samples used are just too thin. The soundscape is incredibly hollow, and I don't think with the style you have going here that would be acceptable. You need some midrange instruments, and some thicker sounds (save for that 'ghost' synth - that'd lose all of it's flavor if you did anything to it ). Do you mean the portamento synth is too thin? Or is that the ghost synth? The midrange is pretty full - I think you meant low mids which entertain little instrumentation in the song. The drums are pretty weak. Not just the repetitive nature of them, the set itself doesn't have enough to really push the song forward. The snare is barely noticeable, and the bass just doesn't add any flavor to the track. The drums can really make or break a track, so set some stronger, more distinctive samples to use, here. Especially if you're going the 'untz untz' route, you need to have the bass break my balls, here, and this one just isn't cutting it. Well, I usually have large dominant drums in my tracks, but for this song I thought I'd try just making something to establish the rhythm and let the instruments control the focus. All that being said, I actually like the instrument combination (just need some more sound, overall), and that ghost instrument is pretty awesome. I just don't think it's ready for submission, as it stands. What do you mean by more sound? Do you mean more instruments or more frequencies? Which one is the ghost synth? It's not a matter of readiness and I don't intend on making significant changes. The song has served its purpose for me. I did a lot of things in it I don't normally do, and it was a fun use of 3 hours. If you don't think I should submit as is, that's fine. Besides, I'm making/have recently made a lot of new remixes. Hopefully 1 or 2 of them can pass the panel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gario Posted October 8, 2011 Share Posted October 8, 2011 Do you mean the portamento synth is too thin? Or is that the ghost synth? The midrange is pretty full - I think you meant low mids which entertain little instrumentation in the song. The portamento and ghost synth are one and the same, yeah, I like him as it is. And yeah, it's the lower mid range I'm talking about (I normally speak in low, mid and high, so 'mid' covers an unfortunately large range). Well, I usually have large dominant drums in my tracks, but for this song I thought I'd try just making something to establish the rhythm and let the instruments control the focus. Mmm... well, large and dominant is one route to go. Complex and interesting is another route. The drums themselves just don't support the instruments you have, here - it sets a beat, but What do you mean by more sound? Do you mean more instruments or more frequencies? Filling the frequency space mentioned earlier would help. The harpsichord texture doesn't quite lend to filling the soundscape behind the melody and bass enough, to me, so another instrument, perhaps? It's hard to comment on it, since there's nothing technically wrong with what you have, here. It just sounds like it's not finished, to my ears, for some reason. The song has served its purpose for me. I did a lot of things in it I don't normally do, and it was a fun use of 3 hours. If you don't think I should submit as is, that's fine. Besides, I'm making/have recently made a lot of new remixes. Hopefully 1 or 2 of them can pass the panel. Yeah, I understand - it's not a bad track by any stretch, don't get me wrong. I just wanted to give you feedback on it from an OCR point of view and list why I didn't think it would be worth it to submit, since you asked. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperiorX Posted October 8, 2011 Share Posted October 8, 2011 Well, it breaks pretty frequently already. Not sure what else I can do there. I can always add more drum layers though. Drums kick in at 0:26. Little break at 0:31-0:33. Break at 0:38 to transition. Another break at 0:52. Break at 1:18-1:20. Drums stop at 1:46. Roll build up from 1:52 - 1:58. Drums stop again at 2:26. Every section inbetween the breaks seems to follow the same 4 beat pattern, with a small break or stutter effect every 4 or 8 measures. It's not bad, I just meant it sounds a little repetitive after awhile. If the the loop was an 8 beat pattern instead of the 4 beat repeating pattern, or something with a bit more variation, it might help out. I actually think the drums are a little too loud at parts too, but that's my personal opinion given the style of the track. I'm not quite sure what else you could do either. Layering might just end up cluttering the atmosphere of the piece. It's a really fun song though, nonetheless. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Covenant Posted October 8, 2011 Author Share Posted October 8, 2011 Drums kick in at 0:26. Little break at 0:31-0:33. Break at 0:38 to transition. Another break at 0:52. Break at 1:18-1:20. Drums stop at 1:46. Roll build up from 1:52 - 1:58. Drums stop again at 2:26. Every section inbetween the breaks seems to follow the same 4 beat pattern, with a small break or stutter effect every 4 or 8 measures.It's not bad, I just meant it sounds a little repetitive after awhile. If the the loop was an 8 beat pattern instead of the 4 beat repeating pattern, or something with a bit more variation, it might help out. I actually think the drums are a little too loud at parts too, but that's my personal opinion given the style of the track. I'm not quite sure what else you could do either. Layering might just end up cluttering the atmosphere of the piece. It's a really fun song though, nonetheless. You're right I could've changed the base pattern after a while, but I didn't think it was necessary since the song is less than 3 minutes and the drums play for only a little more than half. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperiorX Posted October 8, 2011 Share Posted October 8, 2011 You're right I could've changed the base pattern after a while, but I didn't think it was necessary since the song is less than 3 minutes and the drums play for only a little more than half. Yeah, it's hard to say given the track length and the absence of the drums altogether in parts like you mentioned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OfficialJab Posted October 9, 2011 Share Posted October 9, 2011 Outstanding track. It wouldn't seem out of place to me on the front page. Shame it didn't make it to Back In Blue in time, but it might stand better as its own. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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