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djpretzel

*NO* Astyanax 'Day in Remlia'

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email sub file Day in Remlia.mp3

Hi. my name is Todd and I would like to submit this song "Day in Remlia" from Astynax for the NES. Hope you like it. Todd

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http://www.zophar.net/nsf/lord.zip - Track 4

Uh, what is up with that sparse, repetitive percussion? The sparseness I didn't mind so much, as you wanted things to be laid back alongside the guitar work, but it just droned on like a metronome.

The guitar work (thought quiet) was ok and I'm sure Vig could give some insight on how well things were pulled off, but where's the substance in the rest of the instrumentation? It's just guitar + tap tap tap. Ultimately, that's lazy and an obvious NO-go.

You're definitely a lot better than that, Todd. Looking forward to hearing something from you with more substance, like your previous OC ReMix, "Inquisition", which was great. I'd definitely like to see you have a sophomore mix here.

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You would have done better to can the click track altogether. Nice guitar, but that percussion is ridiculous. The fact that I can hardly hear the kick (yes I know it's there) doesn't help.

This thing is begging for a proper bossa nova percussion part. :(

NO RESUB

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Tappy annoying beat, what's going on here? The drum line needs to be reworked from the ground up. Sounds like you're using some filter on the or it's horribly recorded. Either way the result sounds cheap, it sounds like those annoying metronomes. 8O I could never stand those either. I understand you probably wanted it for time keeping purposes, but this has got to be reworked.

Everything here is way too quiet too. Bring up the levels some.

I think the performance is adequate, and you have some nice ideas here compositionally, particularly by the end. I do think the arrangement is a little abstract and feels a little underdeveloped. This has a very live/unplugged feel which is a plus or minus depending on what you're doing.

I feel also the piece is very sparse sounding.

But that metronome-esque timekeeping tapping, yikes. I was going crazy by the end. This has potential for a resubmission, but it would require a good deal of time invested.

I'd like to hear more from you though, you have some very interesting ideas. But a NO for me.

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