*NO* Air Fortress 'Bass Fortress'

[djpretzel]

Several issues, but what an interesting source! This was borderline DR for me but I couldn't find a compelling enough reason to not get it some panel feedback on the specifics - especially from those of you more versed in EDM & dnb!

- djp

 

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a drum n bass remix I did for an Air Fortress theme on Nintendo

Contact Info:
Your ReMixer name: Gwee
Your real name: Vinny 
Your email address: 
Your website: http://itsgwee.wix.com/gwee
Your userid: 29363

Name of game(s) arranged: Air Fortress
Name of arrangement : Bass Fortress
Name of individual song(s) arranged: Air Fortress Interior
Additional information about game including composer, system, etc. (if it has not yet been added to the site) :
Composer: Hideki Kanazashi,  System: NES/Famicom

Link to the original soundtrack (if it is not one of the sound archives already available on the site)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bj5-nmVdIvg

Your own comments about the mix, for example the inspiration behind it, how it was made, etc. :
Sounded like an evil track, so I wanted it to be "death star" sounding. DnB seemed like a nice genre for it to sit in. FM synths and sub synths were used. Distortions wave-shaping and other FX and tricks were used. Any specific questions let me know. Thanks

 

Edited March 9, 2016 by Liontamer
closed decision

[Sir_NutS]

Ah yes I'm familiar with the source, played plenty of Air Fortress back in the days.  Impossible to beat though.  Anyways, strange remix.  The intro buildup was pretty cool, however after that the mix shows its issues very clearly.  Your sub is way too strong.  It's obscuring every other element of your track.  The detuned lead is too reeverb-y and needs more presence.  You need more harmonies and backing elements, you basically have drums, bass and a single lead, which is not very interesting at all.  You tried introducing a secondary element to the mix at 2:35 but it's another growl bass which is conflicting with the other overbearing bass and at this point the entire mix falls apart completely.

The interpretation is minimal here, your song is too repetitive, the source melody is repeated without variation again and again without much care for structure or flow.  There are no harmonies to be found.

You had some interesting buildups here and there but this would need a lot of work to get a pass.  Your remixes need to have substantial interpretation, and you need to work on getting a clear mix for your songs.

NO

[DragonAvenger]

Mike has a lot of really good critiques here. Immediately I'm noticing the overpowering bass, and the heavy reverb. I'll also echo that the track generally sticks pretty close to the original methodically. I do like the breakdown/buildup combo you put in the middle, it provides a nice break.

I suggest this a lot to many mixers,  but I always encourage submitters to listen to the most recently posted mixes and compare them to the original sources to hear the kinds of personalization and interpretation OCR looks for in a mix. It gives a good idea of how things were changed and arranged and might give you some ideas you can work with.

You've got a start here, though there is a lot of work to go. Keep working on your mixing and  arrangement. Good luck!

No

[Jivemaster]

Some interesting ideas here, but these are mostly clouded by some mixing and arrangement issues that need to be sorted before this mix could be considered for OCR. I've summarised a few of the main issues below:

• The wobbly synths are lacking a bit in upper frequencies and feel like they're wobbling out of tempo compared to the rest of the mix, which became disorientating over time. I would consider brightening up these synths a bit, varying their progressions/parameters more over time, and aligning the wubs better with the track tempo.
• As the others have mentioned, your sub is pretty big and frequency consuming. You could certainly roll some of that off without causing any issues with power.
• When the drums, bass and synths are going simultaneously, there is some low end muddyness and frequency collisions going on which is messing with the audibility of your parts. Consider rolling back some of the unneeded frequencies in some of the parts. If you have portions of the mix that must share frequency space, use alternate EQ notches or reconsider if those parts are actually needed.
• Drums are heavy hitting, but not overly varied.
• I found the arrangement to be fairly similar throughout. While I did appreciate the minimal nature of the track, and enjoyed the change in pace near the centre of the track, I feel more could've been done to vary up the arrangement to reduce repetitiveness.
• A minor point, the outro drums starting at 3:50 and continuing to the end of the track went on for a bit too long IMO, exacerbated by them running the same 4 bar pattern over and over.

I concur with the crits the other judges have made here and in particular, want to reiterate Deia's recommendation about the importance of remixers checking other OCR mixes to get a more informed idea of what gets posted and working to meet those standards. So far it's a

NO

[DaMonz]

Okay, this definitely needs a lot of work. I agree about the bass taking too much space, it's the first big offender to get noticed. The biggest issue though, in my opinion, is definitely the arrangement. The same lead does the same melody again and again, which becomes stale pretty quickly. The lead in itself is pretty fat, with these low octave layers, which may be conflicting with the bass at some points. I think such layering should be used with caution for that reason. Also, more expressivity like pitch bends and vibratos could help  give more personality to the lead. I strongly recommend listening to some WillRock for a good reference in writing synth leads. I also think you should look into adding more variety to your soundscape, like counter-melodies, backing pads and arpeggios, etc. Overall, as it stands, the arrangement has little going on in the melodies and harmonies, and sticks very close to the original. The tempo slowdown was an interesting idea that I think should be explored further, though.

On the other hand, I think your drums sound pretty well, there's a nice punch to your kick and snare sounds. I think that was the strongest aspect of your remix.

Bottom line: the arrangement is too conservative and empty, and the bass and lead need some serious production fixes. Please don't give up, there's some cool potential here. I suggest looking for advice in the Workshop boards, and/or asking specific people for advice about how to improve your arrangement and production skills. Best of luck!

 

NO