Metroid Prime 3 / Freedom Planet boss mix

[Souperion]

I guess I should first mention that this is actually a collaboration made with my bro, who doesn't have an OCR account.

More importantly, this is an amateur's fusion of the Rundas Battle (Metroid Prime 3) and the Boss Battle themes from Freedom Planet made with Soundtrap. Metroid has always been one of my favorite games for music, and I loved Rundas' battle from the first time I heard it playing Metroid Prime Trilogy. When I heard the boss music from Freedom Planet, I thought that it would go great with Rundas. So, several weeks and two failed finales later, my bro and I made this little piece, named after Rundas’ last words in Metroid Prime 3. Some kind of attempted rock-techno thing. At any rate, I gladly look forward to any feedback to make this a better arrangement!

Sources:

 

 

And a time stamp, in case anyone wants it.

Zero to 0:37 – Rundas Intro

0:37 to 1:05 – Freedom Planet Boss part A (with Rundas intro underlying.)

1:05 to 1:32  - Rundas part A over Boss battle part A melody.

1:32 to 1:54  - original bridge loosely based on Boss Battle part A.

1:54 to 2:25 – Rundas part A with liberal ornamentation and variation.

2:25 to 2:53 - Rundas part B

2:53 to 3:00 - Boss Battle bridge

3:00 to 3:29 - Rundas and Boss Battle part A.

3:29 to 3:56 - Boss Battle part B.

 3:56 to 4:30 - Boss Battle bridge, Rundas part C.

4:30 to 4:34 – A little made up transition.

4:34 to 4:48 – Boss Battle part C with original counter melody.

4:48 to 5:15 – Boss battle part B, Rundas part B (failed finale 1).

5:15 to 5:42 – Recycled ornamental parts, with some Rundas part B (failed finale 2).

5:42 to 5:56 – Boss battle part B.

 5:56 to 6:15 – Dueling solos?

6:15 to 6:44: Boss battle part B with Rundas intro and part A.

[Somewareman]

Not bad. I'm really no expert, but I think you could improve it a little more by pumping up the percussion some more. That'd give a stronger impact to the piece. You might also try raising the tempo just a bit, but that's up to preference. Overall I like it. With a few adjustments, I think you'll have a real solid remix.

[Souperion]

Much appreciated, I'll take a stab at that then!

[Souperion]

Now with (hopefully) more pumped percussion, an additional 10 beats per minute, and misc tweaks with sound.

[timaeus222]

Hey man, sorry for the wait!

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MOD REVIEW

Phew, this sounds like a rather ambitious piece. Also, a mod review is generally for when you want to submit to OCR, just fyi.

Summary

The main things that I would keep in mind are:

• Each note in each instrument feels like a similar intensity, so the instruments feel robotic.
• Try to keep instruments playing their usual role, at least in this context. In this context, my suggestion is that, e.g. a bass should play bass, not "baritone", orchestral drums should play as orchestral drums, not rock drums, etc.
• Perhaps consider cutting out some parts of the arrangement, so that it flows better. I know you may be attached to some of it, but sometimes you gotta be more objective about it.

There are some good things in this though:

• Props for writing something this long. It's hard to even think up something of this length.
• You have a pretty good structure, and nothing too much feels that out of place, besides the parts I mentioned.
• You do have drum variation, which distinguishes sections from each other.

Arrangement

Whenever I see a long piece like this, I consider whether the ideas still flow into each other, whether there are sufficient transitions, whether there is a dynamic progression, etc. Because I like to be able to figure out how a piece progresses, here's how my mind is trying to structure this based on what I hear. Maybe it'll help you decide what you may want to cut out, because this is quite long, with many ideas packed in, and can be condensed down.

• 0:00 - 0:35 = Intro
• 0:35 - 1:00 = Buildup/Verse (maybe?)
• 1:00 - 1:26 = Chorus?
• 1:26 - 1:46 = Slow Bridge
• 1:46 - 2:14 = Chorus 2 + Solo? Leads into breakdown
• 2:14 - 2:27 = Breakdown
• 2:27 - 2:41 = Big verse?
• 2:41 - 2:49 = ??? This doesn't feel like it fits here, because it's out of the key and sudden.
• 2:49 - 3:15 = Chorus 2
• 3:15 - 3:41 = Continuation, suggests winding down again.
• 3:41 - 4:15 = Dissonant proggy section? Perhaps try cutting this out to see what you think, as it seems to connect just fine without this in here, and it feels a bit out of place.
• 4:15 - 5:07 = Big verse again + drum variation
• 5:07 - 5:20 = Breakdown + more drums
• 5:20 - 5:34 = Chorus 2, meant to sound bigger
• 5:34 - 6:17 = Continuation to ending

Production

You seem to be fairly new at this, so it may be better if we focus on arrangement primarily. Nevertheless, I would say that most of the production weirdness is actually in the choice of sounds (in terms of what roles they are apparently playing, or doubling up on), and how robotic their note intensities are.

Regarding the note intensities, they feel like they're mostly the same; an analogy is plunking on a piano with your fingers for the entire performance. They need humanization. A typical pianist would have phrasing, and in that phrasing, the note intensities have variation (randomness), and an arc (a flow or shape to it). This is hard to learn without learning an instrument in real life, but perhaps it will help to listen to how these differ:

• https://app.box.com/s/ndt9vz26mjhdul6sreqgkvf6eqlp2qfy (Robotic intensities)
• https://app.box.com/s/lr9nxha1zbg5vfcxufqqvuiz9vjnliyu (Robotic rhythm)
• https://app.box.com/s/pmwybgad4who5679p9xvuxdnnmqshas5 (Both)
• https://app.box.com/s/jjapuupib9zfypwoew1ecr31nlq8siw4 (Humanized)

This probably fits better as an arrangement critique, but... it influences how you would produce it, so here are some examples of how certain instruments seem to be not playing their usual role, or seem to be playing in an uncomfortable range.

• 2:49 - 3:14 --- the bass seems to be playing pretty high, so it's not providing the low foundation that it typically would.
• 0:48 - 1:00 --- the lead there is pretty piercing, since it's playing fairly high notes, above its usual range.
• 1:00 - 1:24 --- the drums you are using (snare, timpani, ...) are made for orchestral music, but here they are playing the role of the double-time 1-2 kick/snare rock pattern.

It is because of things like these that there is a lot of frequency clashing, particularly in the low-midrange (250 - 500 Hz or so). The range above the bass hits here, the range of the left-hand piano would hit here, rhythm guitars would hit here, etc. Lots of ways to clash, and you'd want to avoid that. Whenever the timpani plays as if it were a kick drum in a rock drum kit (0:35 - 1:26 is an example), that adds to the muddiness of the production.

Besides the clutter due to instrument roles, also consider the clutter due to instrument count. I know it can be fun to keep adding and adding, but sometimes you gotta take out an instrument to leave room for another (call this competing for attention), and you gotta let the lead shine. An example of too much is 2:49 - 3:15, where everything competes for attention.

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Conclusion

Overall, unfortunately I would not believe this is going to pass the panel, if that was your plan. But it's a good starting point for improving. Good luck!

[timaeus222]

[This is an automatically generated message]

I've reviewed your remix and have returned it to Work-in-Progress status, indicating that I think there are some things you still need to work on. After you work on your track and feel that you'd like some more feedback, please change the prefix back to Ready for Review and I'll review it again! Good luck!