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Liontamer

*NO* Super Mario World "Mario in Machina"

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Hey folks, long-time/first-time here.

The following is a link to my first submission to OC ReMix:
 
My contact info:
Submission info:
  • Game arranged: Super Mario World
  • Name of arrangement: Mario In Machina
  • Name of song arranged: Map 3 (Vanilla Dome)
  • The site has all the info on this track and game already
Additional comments about my submission:
I've always been surprised not to see any mixes of this track on the site, because it's the one that has always grabbed me the most from SMW since the game first came out. So I gave it a sort of factory-floor-coming-to-life spin. I hope you like it!
 
- Joey Martell
 
Edited by Liontamer
closed decision

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15 years ago, this would have been a shoo-in for me. The core of this feels somewhat MIDI-rip-ish, but it's a very basic source tune. One thing that's not a dealbreaker but still hurt this was that the mixing of the bassline is too soft and subtle. The sound design is cool, but the "Vanilla Dome" melody only has one sound and relies on all of the instrumentation around it to provide the evolution; that's certainly a viable approach that's been done here before, but I didn't think this developed/evolve enough, even within a purposefully narrower dynamic curve like this track has.

The changeup at 2:32 was very welcome, though it was only for 20 seconds. Back to the melody again at 2:58, but it was just repeating things from where the build up and textural density started peaking at 1:58. There were some additional scratchy/distorted sounds from 3:28 until the end that were worth nothing; arguably too abrasive (at least on headphones), but it's not a big deal and your mileage may vary. Not to make the track too gimmicky, but even other things like some minor/subtle variations in the lead and/or bassline sounds or writing, or playing around with the stereo field/panning could have also added to the development of the piece.

I enjoy and appreciate what's there, Joey, and perhaps some other Js will feel this develops enough, so good luck with the rest of the vote. I'd say to other Js to give this a few listens to better appreciate how this builds in a low-key way. For me, I felt this needed a little more substance, but it was close and the creativity of the take here shouldn't be sold short. If this doesn't make it as is, it wouldn't take much more to nudge it over the line, IMO.

NO (resubmit)

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"I felt this needed a little more substance, but it was close and the creativity of the take here shouldn't be sold short."  This, for me too.  This mix is super creative and fun to listen to even though it's fairly droning.  The source tune has so little to work with that a remix of it will require some extra melodic elements to make it work.  I think the bass is mixed well enough, but melodically it isn't enough to carry an arrangement this long.  The metals that you have playing the lead bell sound from the source aren't melodic at all, just rhythmic.  What about adding some kind of leadwork over parts of the track, not necessarily replicating that bell lead from the source, but what about some unique synth soloing?  I think that would be awesome and would really personalize this arrangement too.  TL;DR Just needs MOAR.

NO (please resubmit) 

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Unfortunately, I completely agree.  It's a cool concept, but it's on a very slow burn that doesn't evolve quite as much as it really ought to.  It's a good start and I'd love to hear what more you can do with it.

NO (resubmit)

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