*NO* Freedom Planet "Pangu Lagoon 1 Mix"

[Liontamer]

We're evaluating the English version, but all versions of the arrangement are included for reference. Would need a real title if approved. -LT

Hi I'm Basic Bronze Sonic (real name: Nathan Armstrong), and I would like to submit my remix of Pangu Lagoon 1 from Freedom Planet (2014)

Sorry if I do something wrong, this is my first time submitting a song onto OC ReMix

 

Tracks:

English -

Instrumental -

Spanish -

Japanese -

(If you want to keep it to one YouTube upload, upload the English version)

 

Business email: 

Personal email: 

 

Name for arrangement: Pangu Lagoon 1 Remix

Name of song remixed: Pangu Lagoon 1

Game of origin: Freedom Planet (2014)

Original composers: Woofle, Strife, and Dawn Michelle Bennett

 

My website:

Forum: 38765-basic-bronze-sonic

My YouTube: https://m.youtube.com/@basicbronzesonic

 

My personal comment on the remix:

A remix (vocals and all) of one of the best songs to come out of Freedom Planet! (sequel game has way better music though)

 

The vocals are easy and the songs an absolute bop, it's the one song that feels like it came from a game separate from Freedom Planet. (which I absolutely enjoy)

 

Anyways hope you enjoy the remix of Pangu Lagoon 1

Edited October 30, 2023 by prophetik music

[prophetik music]

intro is mostly drums and some ep with some inaudible vox behind it. the melodic material picks up at 0:23 with some frankly inaudible mastering - the drums are super boomy and way heavy in the low end, and as a result crush everything else out. there is also immediately obvious clipping that continues for most of the track. the drum issue is mostly that the kick and snare sound like they have a ton of bass content in them, and it's bullying out other elements of the track. a freq analysis shows what's wrong here - there needs to be a ton of work rolling off sub-bass content (like everything under 40hz) and then everything needs to be turned down by about half. then an EQ pass to get everything out of the 50-150hz range and shelf each instrument into its own slot so it's not stepping on everything else.

this is rough enough that it's an immediate rejection, so i'll proceed from the perspective that this needs to be fixed and still look at the rest of the arrangement. note that i'm having issues identifying individual instruments aside from the lead since they're all in the same range and layering on each other.

we get the melody right off the bat, and then there's some countermelodic content in there too occasionally. the stuttered ep/chordal elements repeat for a while underneath also. we get a break at about 1:07 that's led by what sounds like a clavinet or ep, and then we're in a recap section driven by the stuttered ep from the first chorus.

the second drop of melodic content starts at 1:50 and sounds pretty similar to the first time around. this is a fine time to mix it up so you're not using the same synths doing the same thing for a second time through. after this is an outro (?) section starting at 2:19 with some vox over the intro content, and then it loops and fades instead of a traditional ending. fades can be useful, but i feel like you had a fair shot at a real ending here with how you toned it down - you may want to explore that.

this needs significant mastering work before it's viable. please consider the workshop forum or the workshop discord channel for additional assistance.

 

 

NO

[Liontamer]

Really cool to be introduced to this theme. For me, it has a lot of PlayStation-era Mega Man X vibes; awesome choice, Nathan, and I'm interested to hear how you approached this.

Opens up very conservatively, so we'll see how this breaks off into its own thing. Whoa, the lead at :22 is so piercing and abrasive, so much louder than anything else. The beats behind it sound thin, and there's a chippy-style backing part (not the countermelody) that seems to be filling a kind of bass part, but just sounds like distortion and white noise. The countermelody also sounds slightly off-key from :37-1:06. The fadeout ending after repeating stuff at 2:41 was also anticlimactic. Beyond eliminating the clipping, distortion, and piercing high-end freqs, the textures still feel empty despite the busyness; something's missing here. For contrast, the original has parts that are constantly padding this, whether it's warm backing synth lines in the intro & chorus or the delays on the lead during the verses; see if you can come up with your own ideas to help properly fill in the soundscape.

Structurally, this is super conservative. The instrumentation's changed, though it's not texturally cohesive. Even if the mixing of these parts was ideal, this is too conservative of a cover for us to approve. Per what we're looking for from our Submissions Standards, more needs to be done for this version to distinctly stand apart from the original song. We do have plenty of melodically conservative arrangements on OCR that still are more interpretive (see: https://ocremix.org/remix/OCR04414 and all of the tracks linked in that writeup), so also consider listening to those for other ideas on how you can sufficiently personalize your style in this arrangement even more.

NO

[MindWanderer]

Wow, that's loud! I had to cut my volume by a full 50%.

The votes above mine capture the major issues. Production is a major issue, with balance and distortion issues throughout, and it's also far too conservative. Along with that conservativeness comes repetition: 0:38-1:06 is repeated at 1:50-2:18, and the ending is a loop straight back to the beginning; this makes the last minute of a 3-minute piece a repeat, and 1/3 of a piece being repetition is too much.

NO