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sirXemic

Super Mario 64 'Dire Dire Docks'

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Hey guys,

So I posted this song somewhere two months ago and people said I should submit it here. I thought, why not? So I tried, but it didn't get to the judges panel. So I ask you for help getting the song a step further! Any advice/criticism is appreciated.

Link to the old song: http://www.robosquid.com/uploads/project-files/102_Golden_Journey_Dire_Dire_Docks_REMIX_all.mp3

EDIT: Link to the latest version: http://www.sirxemic.com/Super_Mario_64_Golden_Journey.mp3

Greetings,

Chem8stry

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This is one of the better Dire Dire Docks mixes that I've heard.

For critique, I'm not a big fan of the choir samples you used, they feel very "synth" to me.

I think it lacks a bit of progression and it ends abruptly. I think, also, if you're going to make it past the judges, you're going to need to add a bit of original writing in here. It's probably a good thing, as your mix is a bit short and the quick ending just leaves you wishing there was more.

I'm a huge fan of the "piano and drums" musical style, please continue to work on this because I think it's great.

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That cutoff organ pad needs some more interesting chord writing, imo. Beep beepety lead is mostly annoying. Choir doens't fit in (and yeah it's synthy, but MORE synthy might be better here). Hihat is noisy. Bass drum is fine, imo. Bass is repetitive, you could write some more itneresting stuff for it when not dealing with source... or youcould make it play stuff from soruce all the time.

Piano writing is verbatim source, so you should work more on that. The piano sounds a bit too cutoff, you need more highs. Yes, it's an aquatic mix, but it's not the piano that should be cut. That's something you could do with the choir - EQ down it's highs... and lows. overall, the mixing is emphasizing the bass drum and the bass. Nothing wrong wit that, but you need to raise the other parts that need to be loud - such as the piano.

There's not much int his track that I can remember of the source - just that piano melody and the intro arpeggios. You should rewrite that to fit with the source-less sections.

I suspect source usage was the main reason this didn't make it to the Js' panel. Work on that and the mixing, and you should have it submittable. Good luck.

Please take the time to answer the questions in this post.

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Chem8stry - Please refrain from tagging and releasing your song with OC_ReMix unless it has been officially posted. Tagging files is not necessary for submission. I'll listen and review tomorrow.

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Sounds empty for most part, or simple. The mixing is ok, but the sounds are either not interesting, or a little weird. The wide open aahs are an interesting choice, but they sound a little too... airy, or white... or something. Try giving them some low/mid EQ boosting and/or another voice an octave down.

Your bg pad is boring, even some subtle detune/chorus/flanger/phaser/vibrato/tremolo stuff would improve it, perhaps more so with more complex effects (like a wah or a tempo-synced filter) and some delay/reverb. Not sure if any of that is a good idea, you might be better off picking a better sound to start with, but it's worth experimenting with.

Drums sound mixed fine (at least on my speakers), except for that weirdly panned short little crash. The rhythms aren't very interesting tho, an additional rhythm pattern wouldn't hurt, just don't make it too loud.

I still think the interpretation is the biggest concern the Js would have if you subbed it. The source is there, but the parts I recognized are used verbatim. There's the chords leading into the melodies, there's the part with the melodies, that's it, the rest is just unrelated bass drum thumping. Building on the melodies, give the source-less parts some derived source material to fill it up. You should also consider how you're using the source where you do use it. Don't remember the source exactly, but isn't this a form of midi-rip in that it's basically source verbatim+drums?

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@Rozovian

Many thanks for taking the time to post your criticisms etc. You're basically saying that the choice of sounds isn't really the best and that it sounds too much like a midi-rip.

I can deal with that, but personally I like the choice of sounds. Funny fact: it's not a midi-rip at all, it's all done by ear. That, and even if it were a midi-rip, there are some extra notes which I used to make it sound less like a rip.

Anyway, I appreciate your comment, but - and correct me if I am wrong - it seems that it might take quite some time for me until it turns submit-worthy. And since I am a lazy bastard I'd rather try remixing a whole new song.

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