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Can you guys help me with my first creation?


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I've posted other stuff on the boards before but I really want to plan on taking this somewhere. The music isn't finished. So you might be trown off at how the song just changes out of knowhere.. but it won't happen as much. This is what I want help on.

http://download.yousendit.com/857B22BE126030CD

link to the song, mp3 format.

is there anything I should change in the music notation itself?

Is there anything I can do to help it sound better, the equalization, and all the other mastering stuff.

I plan on adding drums, good or bad idea?

Can someone please help me with the bass. :( I just don't like the way it sounds and you won't hear it unless you really pay attention. and it' plays a big part in this song so it must stick out.

any instrument changing suggestions?

please give me as much suggestions as possible! much thanks in advance.

k, thx, bai.

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Ok, I've given it a listen.

I think you have a cool sort of mood here, but it just drifts around, offbeat. I think if you "locked" the notes into more of a rhythm it could help it out quite a bit - the way it is it just sort of sounds hesitant and disjointed.

I like that you, albeit briefly, changing up the bass at around 1:08.

Maybe you could consider a couple things:

- Add some kind of an intro

- Develop or at least expand upon your ideas earlier than you are. Move it along.

- Maybe remove that 10 second silence you have.

- Honestly, a couple better samples for your chorus, vibes and bass couldn't hurt.

Nice panning effects with the bass, but try to keep the volume level for it consistent - it keeps fading out. If you just keep it a level volume the whole time, you'll be able to hear it a lot better.

See what happens with drums, but it might not work with something like this. Keep on working on it!

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OMFG those vibes are spooky. Thats probably because of their crazy ass rythym thing they have going. err, anyways, I notice this is only encoded at 22Khz! up it 44, and you should be able to hear an improvement in the vocal sample. Unless the sample is 22Khz. In which case, get a better sample. I think there was a really nice free choir soundfont by Papelmedia or something that was nice.

Anyways! This song is really empty, which I am totally down with - except what the hell was with those strings at the end? At 2:08 they suddenly kick in, and then the song ends at 2:16! WTF. It fine to take an ambient track, and then go places where it isn't all empty and stuff - but you actually have to go there. Currently its like story, where with have all this intro stuff, and then there is somekind of dramatic action and the hero falls dead of a heart attack within 10 seconds. Not a good story, not a good track. If you are planning to extend the track, and the strings will go somewhere, thats cool. Just make sure you do go somewhere.

Speaking of structure, some of your chords and stuff didn't seem to have a purpose - they just seemed to be filler, they didn't seem to go anywhere. You should, when a song is streching out to this length, kinda have an idea of where it is going, and then you need to make sure every part of the songs heads towards that goal. Figure out where everything is going, and point it in that direction!

Once you do that, it shouldn't be half bad. ^_^

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Oh yeah, abuot that, thats a part that I havn't worked on yet. Thats why there is a moment of silence, sorry about not brining that up to you guys. xD

just ignore that last part. I plan on removing the cello and everything, I want there to be a link, then it like, gets all nice, then the song gets dramatic. I think I did a good job with the little transition, But I don't know.

The choir sample sucks. :( can you guys help me encode it to 44khz?

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