I like the arrangement of this mix. However, there are some issues with the instrument/drum choices.
Let's start with the drums.
First off is the initial kick. It is over powering the mix, causing it to stand out. If you only used the softer kick starting at 0:40, that would be much better. Second is the hi hat. I like the panning, but it is too loud, try lowering it just a bit.
Now onto the instruments. Alot of the are very soundfonty and midi like. Almost like you played them through a 90s roland midi machine. Very vanilla, ie: they have no fx added to it to make them fuller.
With some good FX mixing, you can even make that sax sound good. Everything just sounds like it's being played raw in a sound studio.
Lastly, is the how some sections sound very bare. In some areas (mostly the 1:01 to 1:40 mark), it sounds bare. But this may be from synth/fx choices. There just doesn't sound like there is enough going on with that bass and drum beat moving the mix along. I really like the break at 1:46 to 2:04 though.
You have a good foundation in the arrangement, but needs some more work. Good start!