OceansAndrew Posted January 29, 2010 Share Posted January 29, 2010 -Xenon Odyssey -Bobby Keller -http://xenonodyssey.googlepages.com -6142 -Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (Sega Genesis version) -Race Results So, because I'm a medicore pianist (hopefully getting better), I decided to take this normally peppy song and make it into a lullaby. The title comes from the thought of racing all day and enjoying the sunset/twilight and has nothing to do with sparkly vampires. Also, I request that you post my other mix (Hidden Within) before you post this one (although by the time this gets to the panel it shouldn't be a problem BUT I felt like I should say it anyway). Cheers, B. Kel. source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpuD4268nwI Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vig Posted January 29, 2010 Share Posted January 29, 2010 Well conceived, but I don't think the performance is really up to it. You use a lot of closed voicings and arpeggios, which makes the harmonies sound kind of muddy. Aside from that, there's really not enough rhythmic complexity here to make it interesting. You play almost all the chords on the 1 and maybe the 3 if we're lucky. Not bad, and it's nice, but you need to do a bit more to get the performance there. NO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Palpable Posted February 5, 2010 Share Posted February 5, 2010 I had no idea this source was so long. I only remember the first five seconds of this from playing it as a kid. Hmm, I'm sort of feeling Jesse's criticisms but at the same time, I did enjoy this. I definitely agree with him that the harmonies get muddy, there should have been a better way to write that or to use the damper differently. But in spite of the fact that the rhythmic complexity is not high, I still want to say YES. I really liked some of the new chords, and the simplicity worked in your favor to make this moving. Every time I felt it was about to drag, you introduced something new in the left hand. Good luck with the vote, I dunno if others will see it my way. YES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CHz Posted February 21, 2010 Share Posted February 21, 2010 Pretty simple stuff, but I dig the melodic alterations and embellishments and chord changes. I don't think the lack of complexity is a super big deal here given the style, although I did feel at times that it could be a bit more interesting. The slight veers into retread territory don't really help things on that account. There's some variety in how things are handled, but I think a bit more in the accompaniment and phrases would be great. I agree with the comments on the harmonies; the simplicity of the piece only makes it that much more noticeable. This is really close, but it could use just a bit more to push it over the edge. The performance is nice and expressive, so just clean it up a bit and work in a bit more. NO (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonAvenger Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 I think the style change works pretty well here. While this remains on the simpler side as far as arrangements and playing level go there is a lot of subtlety in the changes of chords and (obviously) the overall mood. I am going to have to agree with the other guys about the muddiness of some of the chords when things are placed closer together. I'd experiment around with opening up some of the chords and seeing how that changes the textures. Along with that I'd enjoy seeing what you can do to add a bit more to your left hand playing. The simple half note chords sound nice, but when they keep coming back things start to feel a bit repetitious. I'm a bit iffy on the intro and transition into the theme. The connection between the two is a little tenuous to me, and after 5 or 6 listens I still am not expecting the theme to come in when it does, which makes things feel a little awkward overall. I'd like a more solid lead-in to really establish the opening. I think this is within reach with a bit of work. Work on the left hand especially to open things up a bit and add a little more texture. No (resubmit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Orichalcon Posted February 24, 2010 Share Posted February 24, 2010 This works for me. It is simple, but that's the beauty of it. I don't hear any problem with muddiness, or at least nothing to crucify it over. The source is beautifully modified into this gentle piano piece, reminiscent of Julia's theme in FF8. Realistically, we could reject this and ask the mixer to try again in a few years when he's far more experienced at piano playing. But this is a nice track, staying true to the original while changing the style. I have no problem seeing this posted. YES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OceansAndrew Posted March 1, 2010 Author Share Posted March 1, 2010 I really do like the simple charm this track has, but I am feeling that the way the lower harmonies interact, that it is too muddy. Even going into the file and adjusting the inversions of some of the chords would help. I do think it's close, and I think the playing is nice and emotive, but it needs a little more work in my opinion. Check the other judge feedback for some good avenues. no, please resub Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkeSword Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 Quite pretty though a bit simple. Most of the other joojes have covered the issues like muddiness and the simplicity of the left-hand part. You ought think about giving this some more motion and breaking up the chords. Like Vig said, it's a lot of 1+3 chords and arpeggios. I need more than what's here. NO, but please please please resub Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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