A song in desperate need of improvement

[King Tickenn'ya]

Hi, everyone! I just made my account a while ago, but... okay. The thing is, I had this really cool song idea, and so I used the FL Studio to make it. The only problem is... that this song uses guitar, and hopefully I'm not the only one who knows that the guitar stuff on FL Studio is... well, shit. Since I don't play guitar, I ask that a GOOD guitar player can give this song a listen, and think of a way he can revamp this song, like reinventing the solo altogether (please please PLEASE, do a better solo than this!) any kind of riff reinvention is welcome, but try and play a riff similar to what you think is going on here. A drum and bass revamp is also welcome, but I like the sound of both of those already so nobody has to. Um... also, I want someone with a good singing voice to try and find a melody out of some lyrics I wrote for this (some slight improvements to the lyrics are welcome if you think you have a good idea):

"Take me out on Rainbow Road

The “Highway of the Heavens”

Take me out on Rainbow Road

For a Psychedelic Experience

Steer the course to victory

Won’t settle for any less

So won’t you COME ON, and make my dream come true

Let this be the highway I race through

Today, all problems will go away

As I race on Rainbow Road-- if only just for today

Take me out on Rainbow Road

With all the beautiful colors

I’ll be so psyched on Rainbow Road

That I’ll outrace all the others

Steer the course to victory

Won’t settle for any less

So won’t you COME ON, and make my dream come true

Let this be the highway I race through

Today, all problems will go away

As I race on Rainbow Road-- if only just for today"

Link's right here, guys:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aS30FOYiUP4&feature=channel_video_title

Btw guys, no complaining about the terrible quality! While I wasn't hoping to make it sound THIS bad, I did want to have a pretty murky sound in it, as if it was recorded with some lo-fi equipment (because I DO like that sound, actually). I dunno if you can help making your recording sound lo-fi, but guys, if you can, do that! It'd be totally awesome!

[Anorax]

Okay, well, for one thing I can't really find the melody in this song anywhere...

All I hear is adjacent keys being played all at once, then changing pitch somewhat.

It's not a lo-fi sound I hear, it's the playing of several notes that overlap in frequency without any balance. In fact, sound quality is being depleted only because of the guitar.

If you were to maybe play only the melody notes, and maybe add a fifth in there, then it would be easier to distinguish (and maybe sound quality would improve?)

EDIT: Scratch that. I now here a small chord in there, but you played it so close together (and probably used a bitcrusher?) that it's hard to catch the melody.

[King Tickenn'ya]

Okay, well, for one thing I can't really find the melody in this song anywhere...

All I hear is adjacent keys being played all at once, then changing pitch somewhat.

It's not a lo-fi sound I hear, it's the playing of several notes that overlap in frequency without any balance. In fact, sound quality is being depleted only because of the guitar.

If you were to maybe play only the melody notes, and maybe add a fifth in there, then it would be easier to distinguish (and maybe sound quality would improve?)

EDIT: Scratch that. I now here a small chord in there, but you played it so close together (and probably used a bitcrusher?) that it's hard to catch the melody.

So... do we understand that this was made on FL and therefore I couldn't really get any good guitar-like sounds because of this? I'm sorry, dude, I really am.

As long as you know how the main riff is going and as long as you have good enough ideas on how to make this sound like an actual song, then you're all set. That is, if you're a guitar player...

Oh, and btw, the quality was not originally like this. When I saved it I had the quality set at 16000 (it might be called "sample" or "frequency" too... Idk, hopefully, that's a good enough clue as to what I mean) and yes, that's way too low, I would've wanted to increase that a little... but, I still wanted to keep the quality quite low.

And just for clarification: what is lo-fi? I don't wanna be throwing that term around just in case I'm wrong...

[Anorax]

So... do we understand that this was made on FL and therefore I couldn't really get any good guitar-like sounds because of this? I'm sorry' date=' dude, I really am.

As long as you know how the main riff is going and as long as you have good enough ideas on how to make this sound like an actual song, then you're all set. That is, if you're a guitar player...

Oh, and btw, the quality was not originally like this. When I saved it I had the quality set at 16000 (it might be called "sample" or "frequency" too... Idk, hopefully, that's a good enough clue as to what I mean) and yes, that's way too low, I would've wanted to increase that a little... but, I still wanted to keep the quality quite low.

And just for clarification: what is lo-fi? I don't wanna be throwing that term around just in case I'm wrong... [/quote']

Lo-fi (from the term "Low fidelity") is a term used to describe music in which the sound is of a lower quality than the usual standard. The qualities of lo-fi are usually achieved by either degrading the quality of the recorded audio, or using certain equipment. Recent uses of the phrase have led to it becoming a genre, although it still remains as an aesthetic in music recording practice. Many lo-fi artists use inexpensive cassette tape recorders.

No, what I'm saying is that I can't really find the tune because of the dissonance.

I would clear up the guitar part first, then build around that

[King Tickenn'ya]

No, what I'm saying is that I can't really find the tune because of the dissonance.

I would clear up the guitar part first, then build around that

I thought you said you found the tune? :/

Whatever. Gosh, OCRemix users are always so difficult...

[Charlie's Angel]

I thought you said you found the tune? :/

Whatever. Gosh' date=' OCRemix users are always so difficult... [/quote']

He's not being remotely difficult, he said he heard one of the chords but the melody was still hard to hear. Don't blame the FL Studio guitar because the honest truth is the guitars are probably the least the problems in this song. Lo-fi is fine, but you still have to pay attention to quality to make it work, you can't just pass it off as lo-fi because it sounds horrible and call it good.

Sorry man, I really don't think you're hitting the marks you want to with this track. The machine gun drums are too loud, the dissonant chords just don't work and everything about it is way way way way way too simplistic. I'm not trying to be a dick, but this song is almost unlistenable as it is now, demo, lo-fi or not.

[King Tickenn'ya]

He's not being remotely difficult' date=' he said he heard one of the chords but the melody was still hard to hear. Don't blame the FL Studio guitar because the honest truth is the guitars are probably the least the problems in this song. Lo-fi is fine, but you still have to pay attention to quality to make it work, you can't just pass it off as lo-fi because it sounds horrible and call it good.

Sorry man, I really don't think you're hitting the marks you want to with this track. The machine gun drums are too loud, the dissonant chords just don't work and everything about it is way way way way way too simplistic. I'm not trying to be a dick, but this song is almost unlistenable as it is now, demo, lo-fi or not.[/quote']

What?! The drums are too loud? Uh... no.

I'm coming here asking for help to NOT make it unlistenable. I just need someone to lay down some beautiful guitar work so I can do the rest... of course, other instrumentation is welcome too. Idk, maybe it would've been better if I just included the beat and left out the guitar for ppl to have a better shot at thinking of some guitar? Do you think that would work? But all in all, I want this to be a good track, and that's why I am here. Asking for ppl to help.

...But of course, they don't. That's what's difficult about users on OC Remix. They are always rude. They talk of really technical stuff and make everything way harder than it needs to be. They never do anything when I ask for something to be done either. I don't get it, because you guys don't do this with other users. Hm.

(PS he wasn't being too difficult in that post, I was just confused because he said he didn't hear a tune but in the previous post said he heard a bit of a tune going on)

[King Tickenn'ya]

Ok, new version will be made, without guitar. This thread can be removed now. XD

[Rozovian]

Guys... not the right place to crit tracks.

New guy, feel free to post on the feedback boards to get some pointers on what you're doing right and what you're doing wrong. While knowing you need a real guitar for a track is a good thing, most guitarists might not care about your track if it sounds too newby. Improve your production skills and try again later.

[Dj Mokram]

They never do anything when I ask for something to be done either.

I think you've got the wrong adress buddy. This place isn't a Maid Cafe.

[King Tickenn'ya]

Guys... not the right place to crit tracks.

New guy, feel free to post on the feedback boards to get some pointers on what you're doing right and what you're doing wrong. While knowing you need a real guitar for a track is a good thing, most guitarists might not care about your track if it sounds too newby. Improve your production skills and try again later.

I don't really know what else I could add... I wasn't going for a really "produced" song, I just did want a little "magical" synth in there withe the guitar as the main focus. That's my goal. I also asked that in case anyone can help the production on the song sound a little less sparse, I'd appreciate it.

And yeah, dude, I have a different thread up now. In the PYO board. Go check it out, maybe we can let this one die.

[King Tickenn'ya]

I think you've got the wrong adress buddy. This place isn't a Maid Cafe.

Maybe not, but it's a site for music, and collaboration. I've seen the album guidelines-- turns out you're basically required to get extra composers for it! While I'm not making an album, I'm making a song, and songs make up an album... I think most people here would be happy to help out and do some music too.

Well, if you guys are NOT happy to help out... couldja point me out to a place that is?

[King Tickenn'ya]

Ok, got it. I can add a bit more synth in the "chorus" section. And that'll help the piece a bit more.

[Nabeel Ansari]

As far as I know, the only person being rude here is you.

You're being arrogant, ignoring the helpful advice people are giving you (they shouldn't be giving it in this specific thread, but that's not enough to warrant being called rude), expecting people to do work for YOU and calling them rude for not doing so...

It's no wonder no one has offered to help. First step to collaboration: don't be an ass. (and stop generalizing OCR as if we all act the same. That's an incredibly ignorant thing to do)

Saying what needed to be said, here's my advice:

Give us a project file or some MIDI export. From what I can tell it's very hard to hear what exactly is going on in your rendition of the song, it would be easier to understand what's going on inside (what instruments are playing what notes) if we could see it for ourselves.

And guys, seriously, he's not asking for production help, he's asking YOU to produce the song.

They talk of really technical stuff and make everything way harder than it needs to be.

Also, I've been on the WiP boards and the "technical stuff" is just to help you. If you don't understand it, that's pretty much your problem. They're giving you the answer or the steps to one, you shouldn't complain. Music production isn't an easy thing to learn, it takes years of learning your tools and honing your ears.

I understand you don't want to produce this song, you want someone to produce it for you. That's fine, just don't be an ass to everyone; if you be an ass, why would they want to help?

[King Tickenn'ya]

As far as I know, the only person being rude here is you.

You're being arrogant, ignoring the helpful advice people are giving you (they shouldn't be giving it in this specific thread, but that's not enough to warrant being called rude), expecting people to do work for YOU and calling them rude for not doing so...

It's no wonder no one has offered to help. First step to collaboration: don't be an ass. (and stop generalizing OCR as if we all act the same. That's an incredibly ignorant thing to do)

Saying what needed to be said, here's my advice:

Give us a project file or some MIDI export. From what I can tell it's very hard to hear what exactly is going on in your rendition of the song, it would be easier to understand what's going on inside (what instruments are playing what notes) if we could see it for ourselves.

And guys, seriously, he's not asking for production help, he's asking YOU to produce the song.

Also, I've been on the WiP boards and the "technical stuff" is just to help you. If you don't understand it, that's pretty much your problem. They're giving you the answer or the steps to one, you shouldn't complain. Music production isn't an easy thing to learn, it takes years of learning your tools and honing your ears.

I understand you don't want to produce this song, you want someone to produce it for you. That's fine, just don't be an ass to everyone; if you be an ass, why would they want to help?

No, dude, they're not rude because they don't do stuff for me... they just always talk in a mean tone. And that's my problem. Never really much semblance to niceness.

I guess that if it's gonna take me years to learn how to make just 1 song, then I would imagine that just sharing my idea with people who could do it in far, far less time is a good idea. So yeah, I could probably make a MIDI and have it here soon enough. That'd help people get what going on better?

[Nabeel Ansari]

No' date=' dude, they're not rude because they don't do stuff for me... they just always talk in a mean tone. And that's my problem. Never really much semblance to niceness.

I guess that if it's gonna take me years to learn how to make just 1 song, then I would imagine that just sharing my idea with people who could do it in far, far less time is a good idea. So yeah, I could probably make a MIDI and have it here soon enough. That'd help people get what going on better?[/quote']

No, they're not being mean. It's called criticism. It's not OCR specific, it's something George Washington got in his second term of presidency. You don't bitch about their tone, you reflect on what they're saying.

And there's nothing wrong with your request. I was calling you out because you were being really rude.

If you did it in FL Studio, you're better suited to just posting the .flp file. MIDI exports are only easy to do in FL Studio if you have an understanding of how MIDI works, because there are lots of things you have to do before hitting "export" and "Midi".

[erineclipse]

dead link :/

[King Tickenn'ya]

dead link :/

Yeah dude that was a bad (worse) version of the song.

[WilliamtheV]

On 5/29/2011 at 6:15 PM, Nabeel Ansari said:

King Tickenn said:

No' date=' dude, they're not rude because they don't do stuff for me... they just always talk in a mean tone. And that's my problem. Never really much semblance to niceness.

I guess that if it's gonna take me years to learn how to make just 1 song, then I would imagine that just sharing my idea with people who could do it in far, far less time is a good idea. So yeah, I could probably make a MIDI and have it here soon enough. That'd help people get what going on better?[/quote']

No, they're not being mean. It's called criticism. It's not OCR specific, it's something George Washington got in his second term of presidency. You don't bitch about their tone, you reflect on what they're saying.

And there's nothing wrong with your request. I was calling you out because you were being really rude.

If you did it in FL Studio, you're better suited to just posting the .flp file. MIDI exports are only easy to do in FL Studio if you have an understanding of how MIDI works, because there are lots of things you have to do before hitting "export" and "Midi".

I really just made this new account to clarify that I was a kid at the time who had absolutely no knowledge of how to read, write, or play music... other than the drum set. That would be why the drums were the only thing that was doing sort of what they were supposed to be doing. I had become a music enthusiast and wanted to make it. This was right at the beginning of my attempts... quickly I was overwhelmed by exactly how much went into writing songs. It honestly is good I had no idea how to write what kind of garbage I was thinking up at the time. This was just one example- inspired by stoners and video games. Two dregs of societal influence, for the most part. I did stick honestly to my music enthusiasm all the way up to today however, and do compose infinitely better, if not stellar still, music:

 

[Rozovian]

Long-time necro post! I have no memory of this thread, but now I want to hear your old song. Do you still have it saved somewhere? It'd be fun to compare.

[WilliamtheV]

On 4/18/2020 at 10:48 AM, Rozovian said:

Long-time necro post! I have no memory of this thread, but now I want to hear your old song. Do you still have it saved somewhere? It'd be fun to compare.

It was put on the internet as a video and it was saved (and probably deleted) on a computer that has probably become obsolete to time. I no longer have the computer. I estimate this was a decade old or close to a decade old. I am not aware of any accounts I had that still exist that house these early attempts at writing FL Studio pieces. The description I can give, however, is this: it was a fast paced piece, 160 BPM, with lots of double bass pedal, snare, and no hi-hat! There was a crash cymbal. There were a lot of stock FL Studio synthesizer/ambient washes, a stock "metal chord" kind of sound used to play a sort of "galloping" stutter-metal riff. The complaints that people above gave were very valid: I knew nothing of musical scales yet so the "chords" were huge blasts of probably chromatically adjacent notes on a sample that already played what was probably a power chord. There was also a bass, but it was a "BOO_BASS" sample, so it was a re-triggering sample that, as far as I know, allowed for no muting of notes, so it rung out while the guitar stopped. There was no reverb that I remember on it, nothing to make it sound any better. On an earlier version, I did add a guitar solo in the middle, on one of the stock sample packs.... it was short and kind of had a "pop-punk" style to it, in that it was supposed to sound obviously pre-written. It could have been worse from my memory, but it was still written in no key at all, and there were some awkward fowl-ups in rhythm at one point.

[Rozovian]

Sounds like a blast.

One of the ways to tell that you've improved is being able to tell that your old work was worse. There's always more to learn. But it's easy to forget how far you've come already. Enjoy your music making, dude.