Dafydd Posted November 16, 2005 Share Posted November 16, 2005 Sometimes the inspiration hits you like... -... and then you just gotta... -... Anyway, here's the result: Airman (wip link) (source) <-- plays with NEZplug or Meridian Advance A little rough around the edges, repetitive, no ending, a lot of things sound rather unnatural and computerish, etc. I haven't done a lot of work on it yet. It'll be better by the end of my life. If you have any suggestions other than fixing the problems mentioned above, do tell me. Note that this is by no means a near-finished WiP. It's merely a showcase of the sound I'm aiming for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noTuX Posted November 18, 2005 Share Posted November 18, 2005 I'm not much of a rock fan, but I am feeling this. But, its repeating itself way too much. Throw more variation in there. Keep us guessing. And you could use some more realistic samples. The electric guitars sounds midi(ish). A live recording would do wonders for this song. And it ends so abruptly. There is room for so much more here. Please continue working on this. I know its gonna be great when you finish. Perhaps consider doing a collaboration with someone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tenkuu Posted November 19, 2005 Share Posted November 19, 2005 Okay, let me be as frank as possible with you, Dafydd. What you've got here isn't bad, but it is definately not a complete song that can hold my interest for very long. Of course, I'm sure it's not a finished product, but let me tell you exactly what it is you need to do before you can think about submitting it. The biggest problem, and the main reason why I wouldn't be able to stand listening to it for long, is that the whole song is basically just one loop that you periodically add things on top of. Its pacing never changes, and by the time we get to the end, you have so many instruments layered that it's really jumbled and I can't appreciate any of the individual samples. There's not really any proper buildup, outside of the addition of instruments, so I also don't get the impression that the song is going anywhere. Listening to the original Airman theme, I'm seeing some potential for new themes- the only part of it currently present in your remix is the first 20 seconds or so. For instance, listen to the part that comes in at around 0:32 in the original; this is a really neat riff that you could play with, yet you haven't incorporated it. In other words, even listening to the Megaman 2 Gameboy soundtrack, I probably would've had some difficulty figuring out which one you were working with unless it was labeled. Anyway, which parts of the original song you include is up to you, of course. But as it stands, you've got to somehow diversify this mix, and if you don't get the material from the source music, it'll have to come through original solos and such (I would personally suggest doing some of each), and by creating much more interest in your rhythms and melodies. Let me show you what I mean. The way your song structure works now is like this: ( 0:00-0:24 )- I like the bass and the organ-like synth in the background, but the problem here is how repetitive your percussion is. It's the same two seconds of kick/snare and tapping hi-hat over and over again, and I think it'd help a lot to mix things up and, while still keeping the same pacing, reorganizing the kick and snare in a less predictable manner. Not to mention this 24 second section is really just the same 12 seconds looped twice. ( 0:24-0:48 )- Here's where you come in with the electric guitar. I agree with BlueMagic about the sample; see if you can find a better one (I know, it's hard when it comes to electric guitars). But this section, melodically, is again just a 12-second loop played twice, plus you've still got that same repetitive percussion, so although you've added changes, I'm already starting to get bored with your layout. Can you see that all the major divisions so far are at even 12-second intervals? It's another way that the song is too predictable, and you need to change it. ( 0:48-1:12 )- I can barely tell what makes this section any different from the last, except for the fact that you've lengthened the guitar notes a bit. The percussion changes a tiny bit halfway through, but that's really about it. ( 1:12-2:00 )- You've added some cymbal crashes, which is a change- but the pacing remains the same, and the song still moves forward in the same monotonous way it has ever since the beginning. It's also in this section that things start to get muddy- there's so many electric guitar layers that I can't distinguish between them, and the same guitar loop that first came in at 0:24 is still here. Finally, the song ends far too abruptly (which has already been addressed, so I assume you know this already). So all in all, you said yourself that you hadn't worked on it much yet, so I of course won't treat it like you have. But I thought I'd just point some of these things out in case it might help. Diversify, diversify, diversify, is the most important advice I can give- incorporate more of the source material, mix things up way more, and feel free to add lots of your own melodic tangents as well. All that will make this song much more listenable, and I look forward to when you've managed to make some enhancements. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dafydd Posted November 19, 2005 Author Share Posted November 19, 2005 A little rough around the edges, repetitive, no ending, a lot of things sound rather unnatural and computerish, etc. I haven't done a lot of work on it yet. It'll be better by the end of my life. Smile If you have any suggestions other than fixing the problems mentioned above, do tell me. the whole song is basically just one loop that you periodically add things on top of. You're exactly right - it IS repetitive and needs variation. It only uses the first few seconds of the original song and currently consists of a loop that keeps having more instruments added to it throughout the the song, and it has no ending. Since these are all things I'm aware of and things that I intend to fix in due time, I'll just comment on the other things. a lot of things sound rather unnatural and computerish, etc. I haven't done a lot of work on it yet. The electric guitars sounds midi(ish). A live recording would do wonders for this song. Tell me about it. I'd kill to have someone actually play a real guitar in this mix, but I don't. :-/ EDIT: Btw, Tenkuu, I hugely appreciate your enormous post. It would have been greatly helpful if those weren't all problems I was already aware of. I'm not ungrateful, I just think it's a sad thing you didn't save it for when I say "the song is nearly finished now, what do you think?", because at the song's current level of develement, your advice was little more than a waste of time on your part. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Souliarc Posted November 24, 2005 Share Posted November 24, 2005 I'd kill to have someone actually play a real guitar in this mix, but I don't. :-/ I play a little guitar. I'd like to see what I can make of it, unfortunately though, the link to your mix has expired lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chavous Posted November 24, 2005 Share Posted November 24, 2005 Your file has expired. Unfortunately, your file has expired. A link is valid for 7 days or 25 downloads, whichever occurs first. Once the link expires, the file is deleted and cannot be recovered. Ya, that sucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dafydd Posted November 25, 2005 Author Share Posted November 25, 2005 I'm gonna upload it to VGmix's WIP section as soon as they fix their database and allow me to select "unknown" as the original composer of this song. In the meantime, I'm just gonna have to do with this yousendit crap. Unless someone can give me advice on webspace place (one that requires no login, money, and one that can host maybe 5 megabytes and that doesn't expire). EDIT: I uploaded the song to VGMIX anyway. I can't wait forever for that database change. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noTuX Posted November 25, 2005 Share Posted November 25, 2005 I'm gonna upload it to VGmix's WIP section as soon as they fix their database and allow me to select "unknown" as the original composer of this song. In the meantime, I'm just gonna have to do with this yousendit crap. Unless someone can give me advice on webspace place (one that requires no login, money, and one that can host maybe 5 megabytes and that doesn't expire).EDIT: I uploaded the song to VGMIX anyway. I can't wait forever for that database change. Here: http://www.angelfire.lycos.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tenkuu Posted November 28, 2005 Share Posted November 28, 2005 EDIT: Btw, Tenkuu, I hugely appreciate your enormous post. It would have been greatly helpful if those weren't all problems I was already aware of. I'm not ungrateful, I just think it's a sad thing you didn't save it for when I say "the song is nearly finished now, what do you think?", because at the song's current level of develement, your advice was little more than a waste of time on your part. Not a problem, Dafydd. And when you're closer to being finished and there's more for me to say, I'll feel free to do so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dafydd Posted January 2, 2006 Author Share Posted January 2, 2006 I'm just bumping this before it ends up on the wrong end of page 2. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dafydd Posted March 3, 2006 Author Share Posted March 3, 2006 And now I'm bumping before it falls off the end of the world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dafydd Posted June 21, 2006 Author Share Posted June 21, 2006 Bump Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RushJet1 Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 post a link to the song. vgmix is down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dafydd Posted June 22, 2006 Author Share Posted June 22, 2006 Doh. Thanks Fixed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phntm of the Opra Posted June 28, 2006 Share Posted June 28, 2006 Sounds good! You should keep working on it. I think the base drum in the last part is clipping. As the song grows the base drum seems to add more and more mud to destroy the sound, you might also want to consider lowering the percussions slightly giving the instruments more focus and the song more power. Very nice choice of a song to remix. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickenwarlord Posted July 2, 2006 Share Posted July 2, 2006 It feels almost muted to the point of muffled. I take it that will be fixed in due time. It obviously needs some tempo change to keep things interesting. The layering makes it feel very muddled. For rough work it's not bad, but it's not going to make anyone's eyes bug out at the potential. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.