this is a very ethereal original, and the approach with light winds and harp is a good way to represent it. i found the flute's slow vibrato to be notable but acceptable with the style, but the (truthfully far too) low scoring of the piccolo combined with that slow vibrato to be uncomfortably approaching tuning problems. it doesn't help that the picc's pretty loud - nothing can cover a piccolo to begin with, so having it so far in the front with little room verb is tough to hear. when the flute and picc play together the slow vibrato issue is exacerbated due to the performer not varying their vibrato depth or speed between instruments as expected, and then at :53 the intonation is real notable. further intonation issues exist in the clarinet at 1:03.
these are, to be honest, all nitpicks and not enough on their own to really sway my vote. all of these issues described are scoring-related for real-world instruments - for example, at 1:03, you've got an exposed clarinet playing a concert G (A is fully open with the flutter key open, and is moderately sharp). meanwhile, the bassoon's B is naturally flat there. this is intended mainly as an example - while live instruments certainly add a beautiful spark to open soundscapes like this, you have to take extra time to focus on the real-world tonalities of the instrument, vs. what you'd hear in a perfectly-recorded sample pack, and score around those natural tendencies (or ensure that your performers are adjusting for them). all that said, the performances together as a whole are good enough.
it's important that i don't take away from the overall great job transforming the source here. you stayed safe but did a nice job translating the melodic portions to different voices without making it sound like a summer band pop song. the harpsichord parts are really touching, and they're well balanced in the mix - it would have been so easy to let something without dynamics like a harpsichord stick way out and you didn't let it. what's more, the overall mastering of the work is clean and clear, if a bit heavy on the picc as noted above.
as a whole, this is a beautiful arrangement that suffers a bit from some of the natural implications of working with live performers. despite how i may have sounded above, i do believe that the quality of arrangement and careful attention to keeping the melody moving through the instruments more than balances out the few missteps by your performers.
YES