Emunator

The lead performances here are fabulous, that's not in question whatsoever. I also would have liked to see more dynamics in the part writing on the piano as well, but I'll also call attention to the EQ/reverb levels on the piano. Because the piano lives almost exclusively in the lower registers, the reverb starts to build up heavily in those lower frequencies. In the future, I would recommend sending your reverbs to a bus so you can apply an EQ shelf/cut somewhere between 200-500hz to reduce some of that low frequency mud. A little dip to the dry piano itself would probably also clean up the mix slightly. All that said, this is just advice for the future - this track is very clearly over the bar and should stand as a solid entry to our catalog even in its current form. Nice work y'all! YES

I found myself unfortunately siding with MW/Prophetik on this one, loving the concept but feeling like there's not quite enough connective tissue to link the bones together. Just a couple layers of texture or some additional flourishes would put this over the bar from a sound design perspective and keep it from feeling too plodding or static. Arrangement-wise, I think this could have been trimmed up and still gotten the point across, or if you were feeling ambitious, find ways to differentiate the second half from the first, but as it stands, the length isn't justified. I know project files were lost here and edits aren't possible, but hopefully the feedback can get implemented down the line in future stuff. You've got the creativity locked down, just need that last bit of polish til you're reaching that finish line with consistency! NO

I've been coming back to this one many times and struggling to reach a verdict. There's a lot of things I do like about - the adaptation of the source material, the overall "vibe" of the track, and the arrangement itself, at their core, are really enjoyable. You did a great job making this into your own on the arrangement level. The tubular bells are a great touch. I can see how this won some judges over on that merit alone. I can't point to a singular issue that sinks this, but at the end of the day, I ultimately feel like the sound design and mixing lets this down. Many of the sounds used are so simplistic in tone, and the balance issues with the mix serves to accentuate these deficiencies rather than mask them. There's a lot of potential for a really groovy rhythmic cadence, but with the bass and drums being mixed so far in the background, it never feels like it locks into a groove I can really feel. The picked bass sample at :54 has a lot of potential, but it just draws attention to the fact that the bass in the rest of the track feels phoned in and doesn't have nearly the same amount of character. The rhythmic elements feel detached from the melodic ones rather than working together. The lead bell tone is very plain sounding, so coupled with the fact that they are sequenced pretty rigidly and frequently play long uninterrupted stretches of melody without anything else going on to pad it out, you draw further attention to an aspect of the track that is fundamentally not very strong. I think Rexy's suggestion about other pads/arps/keys is also one to explore. It's a lot easier to get away with using stock-sounding samples when your instrumentation is fully fleshed out. But I also think that finding ways to add more interest to your part writing, especially the lead melody, would go a long way. Here's just a few ideas that come to mind, none of which are "must-haves" but just different approaches you could explore: Listen to your drum groove and explore ways to get them to work together rather than just coexisting in the same space but never really talking to one another. Be more intentional with your velocities on a micro scale - first look at the groove you want with your beat and accentuate the on-beats and off-beats, then you can subtly track your bass and melodies to that rhythm so that there's more of a cohesive pulse to the track. Change up the lead sound occasionally with some call-and-response action with other instruments - Flexstyle said it best about music being a conversation rather than one instrument standing up and speaking their peace uninterrupted, and I will second this suggestion wholeheartedly. Selectively layer in additional belltones/keyboards during certain sections of the song. Try to put yourself in the headspace of a pop song and visualize your arrangement from a verse/chorus perspective, where you want the verse to be more subdued and the chorus to hit a little harder. Punching up certain sounds and adding or removing layers with intention can help signal to the listener where they are in the arrangement. Get a little wilder with your delay - for example, using dotted delay patterns or a stronger ping-pong effect, or automating your feedback amount toward the end of melodic phrases, for example, is a great way to add some spice to your melody lines. Just because it's a sequenced melody line doesn't mean it has to be stagnant, there's a LOT you can do with processing even the simplest of synth sounds. This same philosophy can apply to nearly any creative effect. This is one of those tough votes where no singular issue is bad enough to drag the arrangement below the bar, but there's also nothing especially captivating that pulls it up over the bar, either. I think my final verdict is that this concept absolutely has potential, but it requires more boldness, ideas, and, perhaps most importantly, intention with what it's trying to do. I do hope we see this again and I'm wholly confident you can bring this up to par, Troy :) NO (resubmit)

@prophetik music@MindWanderer@Chimpazilla Tagging to bring attention to the timestamps in the first post, since Larry stealth edited these in ;)

This feels like the musical equivalent of not being able to decide what to order at the bar, so you just order a flight of all the seasonal drinks that are currently on tap. That approach doesn't always pan out, but in this case, when every drink on the menu is a banger, you really can't go wrong :) Yeah, trendy EDM subgenres blended with copious sound effects is a tale as old as time, but in all honesty, you really have a great handle on the production and mixing side of things and there's a load of creativity in the underlying songwriting, so the end result achieves far more than the standard "slap some sound effects and loops over a generic EDM track" approach. As a fan of bass music myself, I really dig what you put together - the off-kilter rhythm at 1:02 was a standout highlight for me, but there's no weak link here. \m/ YES

I hate to be that guy, but that long of a stretch with audio only in the left ear is a non-starter for me. Mono/lo-fi is totally fine, but this is just painful to listen to. The rest of the track has some great bones, but the frequency spectrum does not feel like it's filled out properly in the low end, like the bass is an octave up from where it should be. All of the core components sound very good and appropriate for the genre but those two aspects are immediately putting me off here. There are other nitpicks to be had, and I think Brad did a good job covering them, but the frequency balance and (especially) the left-ear panning is enough to sink this sadly :( NO

It's... fine? Yeah, I feel like I'm coming to the same conclusion on all of Jordan's submissions lately. The underlying production quality is absolutely undeniable, and the adaptation of the source material is brimming with creativity at its core, but the arrangement is phoned in. It's very obvious when making comparisons to his older tracks, where the arrangements were much more unpredictable and high-effort. I'd love to see a return to that, but all that said, there's a lot of greatness here that can't be ignored. I'm also a lot softer on repetition than some of the other judges, so at the end of the day, it passes the vibe check. Barely! YES (borderline)

You know, I had a whole vote written out about to agree with Larry on this in which I rejected this track on the grounds of mixing and less-than-ideal sequencing. However, on repeat listens, I found myself charmed enough by what this remix got right that I think I flipped my own vote in the process. Yes, the right hand piano is stilted and overall, the tone is overcompressed which highlights the lack of realism in the sequencing, and the beats (especially the snare) is way too loud for this genre. The (lack of) ending is a downer. However, the reharmonization that you did with the piano chords is really tasty, and there's a surprising amount of depth to the part writing across the board. Normally for me, in-game sound effects in remixes are, at best, transparent, and at worst, distracting or a total dealbreaker, but I'm happy to say that every one of them you used here fit quite naturally in a musical way and add some much-needed variation throughout the piece. The vibes are right here. At the end of the day, I get the argument that Larry's making, but I feel like that applies to tracks under the two minute mark for me, which need to make a much more convincing case for why they are a fully-realized idea IMO. I don't think that a longer or more varied arrangement would necessarily do anything one way or another to outweigh the downsides on the production side, and for the genre, the duration and arrangement are appropriate, if not groundbreaking. I'm curious to hear how this shakes out! YES

This is brimming with creativity, it reminds me a lot of your Koopalings track in that regard - I never would have thought to take the source material in this direction, but now that I'm listening to it, I absolutely see how you made the connection and got here. The soundscape is sparse, and I do find myself wishing that the tampura drone contributed more to the bass presence of the song, but things start to fill out by the end. There are some imperfections in the sequencing and performance to be found as well; you straddle the line between unpolished and raw, but I think you fall on the right side of that equation more often than not in a way that evokes a live jam band improvising their take on Koopa Road. In the end, creativity wins out - a well-deserved gold medal finish for DoD and another one for the books Alexis! YES

I'm not sure who Jesus Chic Acevedo is but every time he shows up on one of your songs, it instantly becomes a favorite. The initial string swells hit like a ton of emotional bricks before going back into a more delicate waltz. Ahhh, the dynamics on this track are superb. Incredible use of atmospheric elements combined with a more traditional orchestra setpiece. I was listening through this track and thought I was coming up near the end, only to find that I was barely halfway through, and I mean this as a compliment! It speaks to a very economical use of your arrangement, making sure that there is never any wasted time or dull moments - every movement feels like a whole world unto itself. Yeah, this is really good. Some of your best work to date. YES

Credits: Arrangement, production, keyboards, mixing: Emunator Mastering: Chimpazilla Comments: This track is a spiritual successor to Beginnings, which marked the start of my journey into lofi music production. Enter the Twilight Realm is a riff that would frequently worm into my brain, and on Christmas Eve of 2023, I finally decided to do something with it. Like Beginnings, I didn't listen to the source material during the creation process, simply pulling fragments from my memory and piecing them together like a warm patchwork quilt. Lofi music frequently feels like searching through a box of memories that I forgot I possessed, and this track sort of evokes that same feeling for me. This track was finished in two days and under 10 hours, with Kristina providing a beautifully lush master. Thank you for always helping my work shine, my friend ?

Astral Tales has provided a new version. @XPRTNovice @Gario @Chimpazilla @MindWanderer @prophetik music Let's see if this is enough to flip anyone's vote! I was a YES on the previous version but this one sounds even better to me.

You know, I came into this thread looking for an easy closeout, but I left feeling the same way as Larry - I think there's more to the source material than credit has been given for. The continuous rolled piano chords feel pretty directly tied to the source to me and are present throughout much of RET's arrangement. Without having ample time to timestamp it, I do think this piece warrants further discussion and that we've definitely had more nebulous source material, or more nebulous interpretations, than what I'm hearing here at first glance. Who wants to be brave and bust out the stopwatch here? EDIT: OK, so Rebecca was the brave one all along. The Hero of Time(stamping) that Hyrule has been waiting for! After checking the chords 1-to-1, it may not be exactly the same notes, but I'd be hard pressed to make the argument that this is not a remix of the Lightroot theme. The presentation of the melody as a sequence of sparse rolled piano chords is similar enough, and the intro sounds almost identical so it puts the source material clearly into the listeners head so that you're not left grasping for straws at the onset. The soundscape is fleshed out substantially too, so it passes the smell test in terms of expansiveness as well. When your source material relies so heavily on rests and space between melodic phrases, the usual timestamping approach is going to make it seem like there's not a lot of overt references to the original, but in context, I've argued that silence can be a form of source usage itself, and I think that especially applies here. The rolled chords are the lighted beacons that connect everything together and provide frequent enough touchpoints through the arrangement that you never stray too far from the source material. Thanks Rebecca for your diligence in mapping this out! This is good to go in my book :) YES

Chromatic percussion is one of the areas where I find Rebecca's work to shine the brightest, so right from the jump I was intrigued. The moody strings lend a sense of progression to the arrangement. There's a lot of noodling here, but there are a few moments where everything coalesces into some really lush, beautiful sweeps, particularly starting at 1:55, that really makes the whole listen worthwhile. Really beautiful stuff! Seconding the critiques about the mixing having some buildup in the lows/low-mids that could be cut out by some EQ dips in the low-mids and cutting below the fundamental frequency. I also hear some unrealistic sequencing in the velocity of the marimba during the last minute, particularly when you strike the same note twice in repetition. All critiques aside, for a piece like this, the mixing and sequencing gets the job done and accomplishes what it set out to do very nicely! YES

Messaged Jortio about this, he's going to make some tweaks based on Brad's conditional vote and Jack's feedback as well.

Aritst: Lunios This is an acid house spin on Lower Norfair fitting with the era of the game being the mid to late 90's.

Hey Josh, I’d love to chat! I’ll send you a DM with my contact info.

Artist Name: Sebastien Skaf Hello, it's been some time since I've submitted a remix! I was listening back to some of the piano arrangements I've made the last couple years and I thought this might fit the bill in terms of being transformative enough to constitute an OCRemix, I hope you agree. At the start of Majora's Mask you find a small tree with what looks like a face on it, Tatl comments that it looks sad, like it could start crying at any moment. It's just a passing remark on something you see for a second in the tutorial, but it's little details like this that really make Majora's Mask so special. There's a blanket of loneliness and desperation draped over the whole game, and I wanted to convey that in this arrangement. In terms of source usage, the entire original tune is there. The introduction to the piece is a 12 bar variation on the A theme which floats up and down the keyboard, eventually resolving to a pretty faithful rendition of the original piece. After spending a minute there I approach the theme again from the beginning with increasing embellishments and intensity: first in octaves, then in a 3-2 polyrhythm, and finally by layering the A and B sections of the piece on top of eachother, with the A theme played as a middle voice and the B theme soaring above in broken arpeggiated chords. I round off the piece with a restatement of the intro that finally fades off into an unaccompanied quote of the A theme. If you're curious, here's the score: https://www.dropbox.com/s/68lcafj4c2gtaje/Song of Healing.pdf?dl=0 Thanks for your consideration

Primary Artist: Fox Ferrari This game has the best soundtrack ever

Arrangers/Composers: Xaleph, Aeroprism Performers: Lead Guitar: Zack Parrish Vocals: Audiomint Rhythm Guitar: Xaleph The plan was pretty simple for us and it evolved into a much more complex song. I'd start off the song, Aeroprism would have the slower mid part, and then we'd combine things at the end. This worked great except we had a 15 minute long song. I spent a lot of time working with Aeroprism to move his parts to combine them with mine sooner. The goal was to follow the rules of the competition where it's a Mashup and not a Medley. Even still, there is a Red Wings part in the intro and a CoT part in the mid, where I put in some RW parts to keep the song cohesive. I kept true to the 7/8 (we notated 7/4) and 6/8 parts (we converted part of the CoT to triplets in 4/4 or just like 12/8 I guess... but the end part to 6/4), so there are several time signature changes throughout this song, which made it complex (but to be honest, I think it helps the song flow, so it ended being an added bonus). The main reason for delay of submission was that I had Audiomint use the wrong mic when recording the first time. With the correct mic, you can much more easily hear the words (plus some side chaining and transient shaper work). The words are very simple (https://drive.google.com/file/d/1c8vdlApsoonfGoLU8cKiBewAL0MWmgw5/view?usp=sharing I recommend looking at the image because it's hilarious, that's Audiomint's handwriting - previous page was her playing with lyrics but we agreed to keep it very simple and not verbose. That's Korean for the "meow" sound for those who are curious): I keep the source RW rhythm moving in various parts (bassline, synthwork in CoT uses RW parts) I wanted to use guitar as a kickback to Powerglove's "Red Wings over Baron" which I've liked for a while The 7/8 part is a very abstract version of the 7/8 part of redwings but I think it fits well. Both Aeroprism and I use Reason so it made collaboration a lot easier than usual. We looked at possibly doing a synthwave version as we still have 9 minutes of unused content. More files / mp3s with id3 tags and project files can be found in the project folder: https://drive.google.com/open?id=1-TaETOVchF09ghl83Goh7KViP6R8Tysa&usp=drive_fs Anyways, thanks to the collaborators, our team, our competitors and to DarkeSword for holding the competition. We had a blast with this song and it only took a few days to write. I find it interesting how some of the better songs happen when it's condensed focus time (or Compressed Time, lol) rather than spending months on a song. I do think to get to the point where it takes a few days, you have to go through some of the longer time in learning, but once you have a process, it's pretty fast and reliable. - Xaleph

Primary Artist: The Vodou Queen COLLABORATORS: Zack Parrish - *Live Steel Tongue Drum SableProvidence - *Live Dizi GameroftheWinds - *Live Alto Flute Originally done for the compo Double Dose round of Meat n' Potatoes - 123, "We Built an Edifice" has since grown and expanded into something I feel is much more than what was its original intent and drive. Based on a heavy influence by one of my favorite Experimental Electronica groups, The Glitch Mob, this version of the song leans more heavily towards its spooky main source roots ("Inner Darkside"), partially because the plan was to have this submitted for Halloween 2023 (but that fell through, sadly). It's as if The Glitch Mob meets 'Tubular Bells' (most famously known as the theme to "The Exorcist" franchise) meets the 'X-Files' / Signals from Space & Stephen King's The Tommyknockers...with a sprinkle of Asian aesthetics and a bit of orchestra. Rise of the Robot's "Builder / Prime 8" plays a hefty role in this remix as half of its bass arrangement, and also as some of the bell/arps structure and harmonic, pulsing Trance chords towards the end, at the key change. My hope is that people appreciate the vibe, and the emotions and metaphors present within, of a driving, unseen, demanding (evil?) entity or force turning one--or several people--into slaves of passion...building that epicenter, one's own Tower of Babel, to greater and greater heights, without rest; (hence the vox line that originates from the movie: Field of Dreams ;) ). In a strange way, it's very reflective of my own vices and artistic processes...and whether or not that's healthy or good is another story entirely. Creative approach-wise, this came half-spontaneously and half-experimentally, something that's grown and evolved over months of tweaking it here and there since MnP123. I just knew I wanted to kind of mimic Glitch Mob's unique style and approach when it came to their synths and bass/drumlines, and see what I could spark of my own flavors and spice to those techniques and facets of composition. Arrangement/part-writing-wise, it doesn't stray *too* far outside of the original source material, however, I did do quite a bit of shaking up the MIDI, changing some note structure for "Inner Darkside" at the midpoint of the remix, and incorporating more of "Builder / Prime 8"'s chords to match it. Hopefully the flow feels good in those spots, inclusive of the slow-down / chill-out after the high-strings riser / drop that drags us kicking and screaming towards that finale...still obsessively, and unrelentingly building on the 'dark tower' that's within every human soul. Every bit in this remix had a purpose, every brick being lovingly laid. This track was a joyful ride, albeit I'd be remiss to mention or say I was reluctant / scared to submit this...purely out of fear it might not gel with everyone's jam. But...nothing ventured, nothing gained--so we'll see, like with all my other submissions thus far. :) Huge hugs and thanks to my collaborators, and their immeasurable advice on how to write for woodwinds and ideas on how to bring out this piece to its fullest potential. I'm always glad and proud of every collab I do, with such a wide-variety of talented and gifted musicians. This one is no different. ♥ Thanks for listening. :D Source Breakdown: 1.] 01:33 - 01:56 = a pulsing bass/synth thump mix plays Builder's (C) content -- you can hear it *just* above the marimba part in the sound spectrum, where it "thumps", and there's a triple "thump" @ 01:44 & 01:55. Acts as a soft, subtle prelude to the heavier bassline coming up, utilizing the same (C) content 2.] 02:30 - 02:50 = primary fuzz bass and its sub-bass counterpart plays slightly modified (C) & (A) content, that rides with melody (**modified for better flow from Inner Darkside's bassline into it); chords and bass were split between the fuzz bass, sub-bass and plucky thump 3.] 03:03 - 03:25 = tubular bell synths play (B) Builder content, unmodified except for key transposition 4.] 03:27 - 04:11 = Hybrid 3 trance chord sequencing plays (A) Builder content, acting as pads and rhythm / harmony to Inner Darkside melody; the plucky thump of (C) content also returns here, transposed 5.] 03:49 - 04:11 = (B) Builder content / tubular bells return for Outro (key shifted 3rd major/minor down with the rest of the remix), until 3rd loop -> Finale

1st RESUB Original Decision Mel Decision: arrangement, production Zack Parrish: alto saxophone, guitar, bass, piano, mixing, mastering GameroftheWinds: bass clarinet Emunator: percussion Lucas Guimaraes: effects, foley This track was a labor of love! What started out as a last-minute bonus track for Final Fantasy VIII: SeeDs of Pandora has evolved quite a bit with the addition of live guitar and bass, rerecorded saxophone, an entirely rewritten percussion section, and brand new effects to bolster the lo-fi vibe. I love writing lo-fi music, and when I was exploring songs from the FFVIII OST to rearrange, Fisherman's Horizon immediately stood out to me as a track that would fit the genre with it's softer, comforting feel. I felt like I could make it work in the short amount of time I had to create a track for the bonus disc on the album. With the help of Lucas Guimaraes and GameroftheWinds, I was able to include some live winds on the track. Since the release of the album, this rearrangement has gone through several iterations. Most recently, I've had the pleasure of collaborating with Zack Parrish and Emunator, who hopped in to expand on the existing parts. Zack especially jumped in head-first: he re(-re)-recorded the saxophone section, and played live guitar and bass for the track, replacing my previous virtual instruments. He also added some piano in the background to counter the winds. Emunator rethought the entire percussion section, bringing in a more dynamic beat to help move the song along while still keeping you in the groove. Finally, Lucas topped it off with some additional sound effects that brought in the right amount of ear candy. Zack hopped in on this latest version to completely redo the mix and master the track. I can't thank these guys enough for all the work they put into the track, along with multiple rounds of feedback to get the mix balanced just right. Their expertise and advice really helped me hear where this track needed to go in order to succeed, and Zack's efforts almost single-handedly pushed this to the finish line.

Primary Artist: jnWake Collab artist: Jabo, on guitars. Yet another tune from DoD! This one was my submission to 32 bit month on December 2023. I've always loved the music in Goemon games so I took the opportunity to remix one of them. Source I picked is more of a funky tune (dat bass) so I went for a funky approach rather than my usual metal one. Original track is actually 4 different tracks on the game, each one layering some extra stuff to the main sections of the song. Anyway, similar to my last submission this started as synth only but I eventually decided to add guitars so I contacted Jabo, who did an awesome job. The track ended up placing 2nd on this particular DoD contest so I think it ended up fine! K, so a little about the source before the breakdown. It basically consists of 2 sections, first a bass riff on E minor (with some G# and C# for funkiness), which lasts from around 0:00 to 0:17 in the video I linked and, second, a part that alters between E minor and C# minor chords (0:18 to 0:35 on the video). Repetitions of each section add new melodies like a synth melody on the second repetition of section 1 (between 0:36 and 0:53), a very pentatonic melody on the third repetition of section 1 (1:09 to 1:27) and a synth melody on the third repetition of section 2 (1:44 to 2:02). I use all of these in the remix! Now, I didn't use that many of the parts without modifying them so I hope this doesn't run into source usage problems... Anyway, here's a breakdown: 0:00 - 0:20: Bass riff based on the main one from the source, synths are somewhat similar to some from the source. 0:20 - 0:40: Synth lead based on the synth melody of section 1. 0:40 - 0:56: Based on section 2, somewhat straightforward but in 6/4. 0:56 - 1:17: Melody on synths is taken from part of the synth melody in section 1. 1:17 - 1:26: Bass riff returns! 1:26 - 1:47: More bass riff + the pentatonic riff on synths, 1:47 - 2:17: Same pentatonic riff but now played on straight 8ths. Lead guitar plays the same melody from 0:56. 2:17 - 2:36: Return of the chords from section 2, followed by a transition. 2:36 - 3:07: Synth solo! Bass riff uses many ideas from the main bass riff of the source... there's also a tempo bump. 3:07 - 3:24: Riff based on parts of the melody from section 1. 3:24 - 3:53: Repeat of the 0:56 - 1:16 section but with lead on guitar now (and higher tempo). 3:53 - end: Bass riff from synth solo repeats for the ending. Hope you enjoy! I had a ton of fun building the arrangement and playing the keyboard solo!

There's an absolutely tremendous amount of ambition on display here, good lord. I appreciate the reference tracks that you provided that show how you brought influence from Japanese city pop and funk-fusion together along with some heavier rock/metal riffage and solos on the guitar into something entirely unique and original. For everything that falls ever-so-slightly off the mark, there's a dozen others that absolutely nail it, and the miscues are heavily outweighed by the ambition and creativity at play. Man, if something like this can't pass our bar, I don't know what chance the rest of us have. I don't think any of the feedback provided here is inaccurate, and especially on the performance side, there's some room to tighten it up, but I think it needs to be weighted in context of how much the track gets right. Nothing I hear is egregiously bad enough that it sinks my listening experience, not by a long shot. Sure, in a perfect world, it would be great to get some of these issues resolved, but let's imagine that the source files were lost and the artist was simply unable to make these changes, which is how we need to consider each submission. Would it be better for this to never be heard by the rest of the community because the technical side isn't perfectly executed? I think rejecting a track like this would signal that it's better to just play it safe and stick fully within your comfort zone rather than try anything remotely ambitious or out of your comfort zone, and I strongly believe that OCReMix is a better place when we encourage people to shoot for the moon. YES

100% this. There's so many great ideas brought to the table by the arrangement, but the mixing feels like a first pass because of frequency buildup in certain low-mid ranges that is creating an unpleasant balance in the mix. Additionally, I'll also cosign that the level of certain lead instruments/vocals is causing them to sound disjointed from the rest of the soundscape, which could possibly be exacerbated by reverb levels not being dialed in appropriately across your instruments. The only other thing I'll add is that the sweep up around the 2 minute mark didn't quite hit the mark for me in terms of the way it cut off abruptly. I think if you play with your volume envelopes on your sample or layer in something with a bit more of a tail, it could be more effective. This is more of a personal suggestion than anything and certainly not a dealbreaker. Great concept and a lot of daring ideas here - just a few technical miscues that you should be able to iron out with little problem. Let's see this again! NO (resubmit!)