(For anyone interested) I'd say to just turn the volume up on the drums a bit for now; Everything else seems in place thus far. If you're going for a straight cover then you're spot on. But, I'd say there is room for at least another arp, chord pattern or additional melody to accompany what you've got here. Doesn't have to be anything over the top, but just something to add some depth to a pretty straightforward/monotonous source : o.
Yes Yes - I should be the LAST person addressing this (given the style I work with) But perhaps you could look into it.