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Zero Punctuation (Hilarious) Game Reviews

sephfire

By sephfire,
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Hy Bound Newbie

Hy Bound

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I have never considered Grand Theft Auto a sandbox game. While you always have been able to simply walk around and blow stuff up (which, when you think about it, isn't really sandbox-y at all), the point of the games has always been the story. I still think that Vice City had one of the most entertaining stories of any video game.

A sandbox game is any game that you don't have to stick to a main gameplay route or story to play the game... I guess many RPGs are sandbox games in a sense...

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JCvgluvr Newbie

JCvgluvr

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Probably the least enjoyable review since Brawl. I'm sorry, but I completely disagree with most, if not all of his points. He underestimated some of the games' greatest strengths, or didn't even mention them at all (sound and immersion). Not only that, but it wasn't very funny. This is somewhat disappointing...

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Triad Orion Newbie

Triad Orion

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Probably the least enjoyable review since Brawl. I'm sorry, but I completely disagree with most, if not all of his points. He underestimated some of the games' greatest strengths, or didn't even mention them at all (sound and immersion). Not only that, but it wasn't very funny. This is somewhat disappointing...

Well, he does comment on immersion, to some degree. At the very beginning, he remarks that the ship does not seem livable and that it's designed with the game in mind, not the other way around. Immersive level design in part comes from practicality, and if the ship doesn't feel or look realistic, then immersion is hurt somewhat.

Now, not having played Dead Space I can't speak for the design of the ship's floor plan. It might actually make sense. But sometimes proper furnishings would make a place more believable. Hell, even the way-post apocalyptic Fallout 3 tries to create some sense of decent furnishings in the towns that exist, and the ruins of other, abandoned places are convincing enough. But if Dead Space's spaceship is needlessly barren or Spartan in nature, that might not make a lot of sense. It's a military ship, yes, but even real life ships are not completely devoid of comfort.

As for the sound, remember Yahtzee accentuates the negative. That's his job, he's a critic. Considering he's obviously played a long line of survival-horror games, Dead Space's sound simply didn't impress him. He says that the game is competent and it's functional, which is more than he says for a lot of games. He just rails on it for being derivative, which is really about par for the course for him.

Personally, I found it funny enough and enjoyed it overall.

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JCvgluvr Newbie

JCvgluvr

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Well, he does comment on immersion, to some degree. At the very beginning, he remarks that the ship does not seem livable and that it's designed with the game in mind, not the other way around. Immersive level design in part comes from practicality, and if the ship doesn't feel or look realistic, then immersion is hurt somewhat.

Now, not having played Dead Space I can't speak for the design of the ship's floor plan. It might actually make sense. But sometimes proper furnishings would make a place more believable. Hell, even the way-post apocalyptic Fallout 3 tries to create some sense of decent furnishings in the towns that exist, and the ruins of other, abandoned places are convincing enough. But if Dead Space's spaceship is needlessly barren or Spartan in nature, that might not make a lot of sense. It's a military ship, yes, but even real life ships are not completely devoid of comfort.

Furnishings?! You really expect a space vehicle designed to crack open planets to feature couches, armchairs, rugs, and the like? This isn't a resort or hotel...Almost everybody is supposed to work around the clock to to their dang job! Yes, the captains have their chairs, and yes, the hospital rooms have their cots on wheels. But that's all they should have on a spaceship. Why on earth would you think that a military ship needs creature comforts. Part of being in the military is denying yourself of such amenities.

As for the sound, remember Yahtzee accentuates the negative. That's his job, he's a critic. Considering he's obviously played a long line of survival-horror games, Dead Space's sound simply didn't impress him. He says that the game is competent and it's functional, which is more than he says for a lot of games. He just rails on it for being derivative, which is really about par for the course for him.

Personally, I found it funny enough and enjoyed it overall.

So, almost every reviewer expounds on the fantastic soundwork of this game, except for Yahtzee? I thought he could recognize excellence no matter how negative he's trying to be? I'll be darned if he could ignore every hiss, growl, clang, whisper, or splat in the game! It is a moderate oversight of his to have done so.

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Triad Orion Newbie

Triad Orion

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Furnishings?! You really expect a space vehicle designed to crack open planets to feature couches, armchairs, rugs, and the like? This isn't a resort or hotel...Almost everybody is supposed to work around the clock to to their dang job! Yes, the captains have their chairs, and yes, the hospital rooms have their cots on wheels. But that's all they should have on a spaceship. Why on earth would you think that a military ship needs creature comforts. Part of being in the military is denying yourself of such amenities.

So, almost every reviewer expounds on the fantastic soundwork of this game, except for Yahtzee? I thought he could recognize excellence no matter how negative he's trying to be? I'll be darned if he could ignore every hiss, growl, clang, whisper, or splat in the game! It is a moderate oversight of his to have done so.

With respect, I disagree entirely. Unless the ship is essentially a sweatshop, modern demands for workers would require some leisure space. A close personal friend of mine is a nuclear technician on a submarine and even his cramped vessel has space for a bloody *lounge.* Aircraft Carriers have things to do on board as well, and unless the vessel is quite small, I don't see why it has to be completely sparse. I never said the spaceship had to be a cruise ship, but for Pete's sake, you have to give your soldiers *something* to do besides work and sleep otherwise morale goes sinks faster than a torpedoed fishing boat.

And really, do you really think Yahtzee to be like every other reviewer out there? His videos make it clear that he's not a garden variety reviewer. Pretty much all of his reviews are personal opinions on a game based off his own experiences. The soundwork may have been exceptional compared to other games in different genres, but I would venture to guess Yahtzee *expects* competent sound work for a horror game. It's a necessary part of the genre to have a capable game. And Yahtzee himself has said his fans never considered him funny when he's being nice to a game and considering ZP is a humor column as much as it is a review, he *has* to accentuate the negative to please his fanbase. Watch his BioShock review again and you pretty much see the same kinda thing. He *likes* BioShock and he spends three minutes ripping it apart.

All things considered, I think he went pretty light on Dead Space, he was more harsh on its narrative rather than the game itself when you get down to it.

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JCvgluvr Newbie

JCvgluvr

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With respect, I disagree entirely. Unless the ship is essentially a sweatshop, modern demands for workers would require some leisure space. A close personal friend of mine is a nuclear technician on a submarine and even his cramped vessel has space for a bloody *lounge.* Aircraft Carriers have things to do on board as well, and unless the vessel is quite small, I don't see why it has to be completely sparse. I never said the spaceship had to be a cruise ship, but for Pete's sake, you have to give your soldiers *something* to do besides work and sleep otherwise morale goes sinks faster than a torpedoed fishing boat.

Fair enough, but we're talking about a ship that clones babies like a vineyard grows grapes. It seems rather cold to me, which is one reason why the lack of furniture is believable. But don't see any reason to continue debating this. I think we both have good points.

And really, do you really think Yahtzee to be like every other reviewer out there? His videos make it clear that he's not a garden variety reviewer. Pretty much all of his reviews are personal opinions on a game based off his own experiences. The soundwork may have been exceptional compared to other games in different genres, but I would venture to guess Yahtzee *expects* competent sound work for a horror game. It's a necessary part of the genre to have a capable game. And Yahtzee himself has said his fans never considered him funny when he's being nice to a game and considering ZP is a humor column as much as it is a review, he *has* to accentuate the negative to please his fanbase. Watch his BioShock review again and you pretty much see the same kinda thing. He *likes* BioShock and he spends three minutes ripping it apart.

All things considered, I think he went pretty light on Dead Space, he was more harsh on its narrative rather than the game itself when you get down to it.

I didn't expect him to devote glowing praise to DS, just slightly less ****-flinging. We know he can pull that off, because of his Painkiller and OB review (Or at least the part about Portal). I thought that if almost every reviewer is giving glorious praise to DS's superb sound, Yahtzee could have afforded to give it a passing mention. But again, it doesn't really matter to me that much. It slightly disappoints me, as does the lack of humor, but that's about it. No biggie.

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Bleck Newbie

Bleck

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I thought that if almost every reviewer is giving glorious praise to DS's superb sound, Yahtzee could have afforded to give it a passing mention

I'm going to go and assume that all the other reviewers also have big expensive sound systems with which to enjoy said sound

when people play Dead Space on a 28 inch TV from 1995 that only has mono output, trust me when I say that nobody is going to care about the sound quality

Furnishings?! You really expect a space vehicle designed to crack open planets to feature couches, armchairs, rugs, and the like? This isn't a resort or hotel...Almost everybody is supposed to work around the clock to to their dang job!

and the best way to make sure they do that job to the best of their ability is to obvious make them tired and depressed

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Reaif Newbie

Reaif

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Just watched it, and I have to say, that he was exactly right about Fable 2. One strong point for Fable 2 that he likely glossed over were all the extra quests that most reviewers don't have time to experience. In the aspects that he mentioned though, ZP was so right.

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