The reverb your using makes everything sound like they're a bit too much in the distance. Increasing the pre-delay on it should bring things more to the front while still keeping the sense of space. You may need tone down the reverb a little as well. Also, try and double track the rhythm guitar to see that helps them sound more substantial.
Also, arrangement-wise, I'm struggling to pick out elements from the original, like the melody, in your remix for some reason. That may be because your changing things up so much or because I'm being dumb.