Native Jovian

This is true of every story ever. Go look up "The Hero with 1,000 Faces". Or just browse the TV Tropes Wiki for a while.

Lies and slander. For FFVII there was plenty of prequel room but basically no sequel room, given that the game tells the story of the very END of an eons-long conflict between Jenova and the Planet (vis-a-vis the Ancients). For FFVIII there's tons of sequel room but very little prequel room (as Cid and Edea created SeeD not-too-long before the game started). Touche, sir. Advent Children was visually impressive but added nothing to the story for precisely this reason. They had to revive about four different people from the dead (Sephiroth, Jenova, Rufus, and Tseng), completely invent some other things (the antagonist triplets, "geostigma"), and ignore stuff that actually happened in the games (why are Zack and Aeris still hanging around? Shouldn't they have 'returned to the Planet' by now? Didn't Midgar get all blown up at the end of the game?) in order to make it work at all.

This officially made my day. Alas, just one more reason that I really need to get my hands on a DS... Edit - Since I thought of something actually on-topic and I don't feel like double posting. Anyone still play Starcraft? RTS games tend to not have "bosses" in the traditional sense, but I think certain levels sorta count. There's an online UMS map (an official Blizzard-released one, not a fan-created one) called Mercenaries II. It's stupidly hard. A friend of mine -- who is quite good at Starcraft -- actually refuses to believe that it's even possible (he's wrong, because I've beaten it multiple times, but just goes to show you that the frustration level on this thing). The map starts with three players against four computers. With a good group, and a bit of luck in your starting positions, this usually isn't too hard. However, in Mercs II, all four CPUS (a Terran, a Zerg, and two Protoss) start with complete bases; the only limit on how fast they can rush you is how fast they can collect resources to build their units. Three of the four also have hero units; the Terran has a supercharged battlecruiser, the Zerg has a mutalisk, and one of the Protoss has an archon (the meanest part is that, unlike a normal archon, all of its health is HEALTH, not shields, so you can't EMP your way to easy victory). Fortunately the hero units have a bit of custom AI to them; the enemy won't rush you with them (unless they've got like virtually nothing else), but they WILL use them for base defense, which means that any rush YOU might hope to pull off is doomed from the outset. Fortunately, each player also gets a unique hero (though nowhere near as powerful as the enemies') and a specially upgraded unit. Each hero is a normal in-game hero unit (eg Raynor, Hunter-Killers, Fenix) pumped up a bit (and fortunately NOT required to survive in order to win), while each upgraded unit is a standard unit (eg dragoon, goliath, guardian) that starts with full upgrades (including spells, if any). The fun part is that you can apply normal unit upgrades on TOP of that, which makes them awesomely powerful. You start the game with your hero unit and two of your upgraded units already spawned. This is the ONLY thing that saves you from the first rush. After that, you have to clear virtually the whole map of the enemy -- and it's not a money map, so you have to strike quickly and secure expansion bases or else you'll run out of resources and be overrun. Fun times, overall, but it can be frustrating when you see a mass of enemy siege tanks, supported by carriers and guardians, all charge you at once. It's completely impossible unless you have a group of players who are not only individually decent, but good at working together.

Legend of Dragoon was awesome. I remember playing a demo of it in a store I didn't usually go to (a Circuit City, I think?) and not really understanding why these people turned into dudes with flying magical dragon-armor shit, but thinking it was awesome anyway. That pretty much sums up LoD. "I don't know why this is happening, but damn if it doesn't kick ass." Plus the voice actors yelling out the names of the additions when you successfully complete them was amusing in the extreme. Rose's always sounded vaguely dirty -- Whip Smack and More & More...

That probably should have been a hint.

Isn't Rune Factory a Harvest Moon spin off? I like the Harvest Moon franchise, but there's something about the idea of attacking a gryphon with a hoe or a sickle that cracks me up. Granted, you could probably do some damage with the hammer or the axe, but if I were playing the game I'd totally go into battle armed with the fishing pole or something, just for lulz.

FFVIII is unique in the series in that it has a sense of just being one small part of a much larger story, one that continues both before our heroes were aware of it and after their personal stories are complete. FFVII is the story of The Planet vs. Jenova -- specifically, it's the end of that story. Jenova dies, the Planet is saved, hurray. FFVIII is the story of the sorceresses. The sorceresses existed long before the game started and continue to exist after it ends. Some of them (like Edea) are harmless, while some (like Adel) are malevolent. The SeeD exist to control the harmful sorceresses. Because sorceress power can't actually be lost, but only transferred from person to person, SeeD will always be necessary. During the course of FFVIII you defeat Adel and Ultimecia, but that doesn't mean that you "win", or that the conflict is over. It just means that things are safe... for now. Think about it. Every other Final Fantasy has a definite antagonist, a single conflict, a clear resolution. Cecil against Golbez (and Zeromus, from out of left field). The Good Guys (fuck, FFVI had a lot of PCs, and no single "main character"...) vs. Kefka. The Planet vs. Jenova (with Aeris and Sephiroth being their respective champions, though Cloud took over for Aeris after she bit the dust). Gaia vs. Terra. Spira vs. Sin/Yu Yevon. All of those had a single final battle, a win-or-die fight that ended the whole conflict. FFVIII doesn't have that. Sephiroth is dead and gone after FFVII (well, barring Advent Children ass-pulls), but when you kill a sorceress in FFVIII you just make another one somewhere else. It's an ongoing conflict, not one with a clear and final resolution. That's what makes FFVIII's setting and storyline interesting, in my view. It's certainly the best set up to have a sequel. Rather than Advent Children style "holy crap [antagonist] is back somehow!!" or X-2 style "here's a completely different situation we pulled out of nowhere, now go save the world again!" FFVIII sequels (or prequels) could deal with the same situation, the same threat, just in a different form. There'd be a continuity there that the rest of the Final Fantasy series lacks. Really? I'm not overly familiar with the PSP, but the only real RPGs I've heard of for it are Crisis Core and some various remakes, which I've already played elsewhere for the most part. What else has it got?

Not having a GBA slot is a legitimate complaint. Backwards compatibility is one of the Game Boy family's biggest draws (though the DS original/lite can't play original Game Boy or Game Boy Color games, right? So I guess if you care about those then you'd need to bring along another system anyway). It may not matter to you, but it certainly matters to some other people, and it's not unreasonable of them to be unhappy with a feature being removed from a supposed upgraded version of the hardware.

Hey! I liked FFX-2! Retarded though the plot may have been, the battle system was fun and the game had some sweet music.

So very tragically true. The one thing I regret about increasingly powerful consoles with better and better graphics is that it allows character models to actually resemble the Final Fantasy character concept artwork. They've always been pale, thin, platinum blond angst machines on paper... it's just that now the technology has caught up enough to make them so in-game as well.

a) primarily, and c) for remixers that I happen to be fond of.

I'd rather see a FFVIII one that followed Laguna, Kiros, and Ward, but I'd probably play a FFX one too. Granted, we were lucky enough to actually play some of the highlights of Laguna's story (<Laguna> *yells at the voices in his head to shut up* <Waitress> *runs away*), but I'm sure that there's all kinds of hilarity that we didn't see between "visits". Added bonus: a FFVIII one wouldn't be forced into an ending where everyone dies. Good times!

Excuse the noob question, but I haven't bought a handheld since I bought my GBA. What exactly is the difference between a standard DS and a DS Lite? Is it something earth-shattering like the difference between GBA and GBA SP, or something relatively minor, more akin to the difference between the Brick and the Game Boy Pocket?

Do you mean DisneyQuest? DisneyQuest is pretty cool because you pay for a ticket to get in but don't have to pay for any of the actual games, which is awesome. Sadly, the last time I was there (which was... oh, maybe ten years ago) their actual arcade game selection wasn't too great -- most of the focus was on weird "virtual reality" game/ride things. Maybe that's changed, though. Is that any good? There's one (relatively) close to me and I keep meaning to get some friends together and check it out, but I've never actually been. Booze and video games never go badly together.

Quoted for truth. Well, I haven't played through much of Twilight Princess, so I can't really comment on that, but "Majora's Mask is the best Zelda I've played" and "OoT steals the spotlight even from newer, better games" are certainly both true. ...except for bosses, which IIRC have both minimum and maximum level, so they'll always be at least a certain strength even if you're much lower level than that, and they'll never be above a certain strength even if you're much higher level than that. How does selling a game for $50, using that money to buy a second game, and then buying the first game back for $50 result in you getting the second game for free?

FR, I believe that would be an example of a problem by the video's definition. If being evil has no rewards, then the question of "should I be good, or should I be evil?" has a single right answer as far as gameplay is concerned -- you should be good, because its rewards are greater than being evil. If you choose to be evil anyway, then you've created a problem for yourself (you've made the game harder by choosing a suboptimal solution), but that's not a "problem as opposed to choice" by the video's definition. Problems disguised as choices, especially in terms of strategy or equipment, always annoy me. For example, in Elder Scrolls: Morrowind, they presented you with a "choice" between focusing on magic or focusing on physical combat. The reason "choice" is in quotes is because a pure mage character was virtual suicide in that game; you needed at least some physical combat skill in order to survive. It's a problem in disguise, not a choice, and it's annoying because it's dishonest. Why present me with the opportunity to go full mage if it's pretty much guaranteed to get me killed? Especially while insisting that it's a valid choice?

Tip: you must include original characters, especially if you're trying to branch out into original fiction. My biggest problem with fanfiction is the fact that most of it is lazy -- they never create anything original. Using ready-made characters in a ready-made setting doing ready-made things may be good practice for the mechanics of writing -- but the underlying ideas, the setting and characters and events of the story, are equally (if not more) important. What I like is fanfiction that uses a setting but nothing else. If you want to write Zelda fanfiction, set it in Hyrule (or Termina, or Koholint, or the Great Sea, or whatever) but don't involve Link, Zelda, or Ganon(dorf) more than peripherally. Write about the Kokiri before Link's arrival. Or about the people on Windfall before the game starts. Or about a soldier when Hyrule Castle is attacked (which happens at least three times off the top of my head, so take your pick). Or something that isn't touched on by the series proper. Personally, I've got a half-baked idea for a Gundam story that would do something like this, except even more extreme (an alternate history story where I go out of my way to kill off most of the main characters...). What that does is give you a solid base to work with (and for readers to relate to your story through) while still forcing you to exercise those creative muscles in creating and developing original characters and situations. As far as "wasting" ideas on fanfiction -- that's silly. There's nothing that says you can't use the same idea in more than one story -- doubly so if they're intended for different audiences (which "fanfiction posted on interwebs" and "original fiction intended for publication" certainly are!). But yes, as far as storytelling goes, I think the most important thing is to have the whole story in your mind (or better, on paper as an outline, as people have suggested) before you start. A lot of fanfiction is basically a collection of "wouldn't X, Y, and Z be awesome? Let's all throw that together!" This doesn't work, at all. Your story needs to have direction to it, and it can't if you don't already know how it will end when you start. Halcyon Spirit talked about how your stuff will change constantly as you write -- which is true -- but that doesn't mean that your original outline is useless. Keep it updated, if you can, or just use it as a jumping-off point, if you want, but don't start writing without some clear idea of where you'll be at the end.

PURU PURU PURU PURU PURU PURU PURU! *cough* Sorry.

Isn't this true of all of them?

Final Fantasy has an amusing habit of making backstory characters more awesome than the actual playable characters. Zack is more awesome than Cloud. Laguna is more awesome than Squall. Jeckt is more awesome than Tidus. FFIX dodges this bullet, but only because Kuja was an angsty effeminate sissyboy -- in terms of sheer accomplishments he certainly kicked more ass than the party did. (He stole Bahamut and then used it to blow up a bunch of shit! Badass.) I haven't messed with any of the FFVII stuff besides the original and watching Advent Children, but from everything I hear they basically take advantage of this to make main characters that are more awesome than usual.

Why did he capitalize the pronouns referring to the judges? I though you were only supposed to do that for God.

I generally use cheats for lulz value rather than actually to beat a game. For example: I used to have most of the push-button codes for GTAII and Vice City memorized. Fill up weapons and health/armor, turn on flying cars, spawn a tank, and go to town... but never during an actual mission! I don't even own any cheating devices other than the Game Genie way back for the original NES. The only big exception was FFX. Holy crap I hated the sphere grid. There was no real way to judge the relative level of your characters -- it was hard to know who needed to be switched into battle in order to level them up. So I didn't bother. My party was Auron, Lulu, and Yuna (providing melee, black magic, and white magic respectively) for essentially the entire game. So when I got tossed into one section near the end of the game where you had to use Tidus, Wakka, and Rikku (because it was underwater)... I got destroyed. Pretty much every random battle was equivalent to a boss fight, but I couldn't use white magic because Yuna wasn't around, and I didn't have enough healing items to keep it up. I was completely stuck; I couldn't have gone on without either a) restarting the game and making sure my watery-people were leveled high enough, or cheating. I borrowed someone's cheatery-device (I can't even remember what kind it was...) and gave myself infinite spheres and sphere levels long enough to boost my people into not-complete-suckitude and finished out the game. Oh man. I'm terrible at this. For a few games, like Chrono Trigger and Final Fantasy VI, I've gotten the the final boss/dungeon but then got steamrolled (because I'm usually chronically underleveled in RPGs) and didn't have the patience to grind up to the point where I could beat the game. For a handful more, like Fire Emblem, I've gotten a significant portion through the game but got distracted/frustrated/whatever and stopped playing for some reason or other. Then there's some, like Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories, Pokemon Sapphire, or Dead Rising, where I played for a little bit at the very beginning but never really got into it and just stopped playing. I've got a bunch of games I haven't beaten...

How so 10 chars?

Sine's way is more complicated, more difficult, more prone to error, and has limited additional utility. Clearly, his way has superior nerd street cred.

People here (well, okay, it was only one person) have been quoting their credit scores. I find myself wondering how you know what it is. Obviously there's those annoying "FIND YOUR CREDIT SCORE FREE!!!1!1" websites, but I've heard that those are a scam of some kind or another (though admittedly I can't remember how it works). Mine should be pretty good -- I have a Visa card through my bank that I've had since high school (I'm now 22 and have graduated college -- my bank is a Credit Union, incidentally, which I've been told is a good thing but I honestly can't remember why). I don't buy much with it, mainly gas (which is a significant expense now that my job is about 30 miles from my house!) and the occasional online purchase. I keep it paid off every month. I'm also paying off student loans, and I'm careful to pay those on time as well. I seem to have a bad memory for financal stuff. Oh well. At least I can remember to pay my bills on time...